A character in Animaniacs
Yakko
Animaniacs · 261 quotes
Most-quoted character in Animaniacs: in 144 of its 261 quotes
Most scenes with: Dot (98), Wakko (94), Warners (33)
[The Warners hold shovels. Dot spray paints boots pink]
Detail, halt. [they did so] A foxhole is a soldier's best friend.
Must be hard to go to the movies together.
Dig! [the Warners dig down, a fox comes out] Huh?
We'd move if we were you.
[The sergeant startles and falls into the hole, screaming]
Did we dig it deep enough?!
[The sergeant lands with a thud offscreen]
[Inside the plane]
Normally, parachuting is reserved for well-trained, elite troops. But in your case, I'm gonna make an exception. [chuckles; grabs the Warners and jump from the plane] Geronimo!
Sitting Bull!
By the way, we took your dirty sheets to the laundry.
What dirty sheets?
The ones you stuffed in your knapsack.
Huh? [pulls the string, and the bag opens to reveal the dirty sheets] Aaah! Ohhh! [falls down]
No starch, right?
[The sergeant crashes to the ground]
[in glorious 60fps] Don't worry, kids. It's almost over.
[The Warners land safely to the ground]
[dressed in a casual camping outfit] Come on, guys. Let's go camping. Build a campfire, make s'mores, sing songs. Come on.
[singing]
Do your ears hang low?
Do they wobble to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot?
Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Can you throw 'em over your shoulder
Like a continental soldier?
Do your ears hang low?
[Iris out, but Dot pushes it away]
[spoken; last lines] Camp is okay, but these pink boots are killing me. [lets go of the iris as the cartoon ends]
[The scene takes place at the graveyard in Hamlet. Yakko plays Hamlet and Wakko plays Horatio, while Dot translates the Shakespearian language]
And now, the Warner Brothers in a scene from Shakespeare's "Hamlet", translated for those viewers who, like Yakko, have no idea what he's talking about.
[Yakko gives a stern look, and Dot, the translator, giggles. Wakko has dug up Skullhead. Yakko sees this, rushes back and snatches him from Wakko, then returns to his previous position]
Alas, poor Yorrick!
Whoa, check out Skullhead!
[while Wakko digs up an odd lamp and tosses away] I knew him, Horatio - a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy.
He was funny.
[while Wakko digs up a mummy who runs away] He hath bore me on his back a thousand times.
He gave me piggy-back rides.
And now, how abhorred in my imagination it is. My gorge rises at it.
I'm going to blow chunks. Bleugh!
[Wakko pulls a squid out of the grave and tosses it aside]
[kisses Skullhead while Dot looks away, embarrassed, as Wakko tosses a kitchen sink] Here hung those lips I have kissed I know not how oft.
[Wakko pulls a pink 1959 Cadillac DeVille convertible out of the grave, then pushes it away]
We kissed a lot - not!
Where be your jibes now? Your gambols? Your songs? Your flashes of merriment that were wont to set the table on a roar?
[while Wakko pulls up a large rocket] How come you're not funny now?
[Wakko must stop to rest before he's through]
Not one now to mock your own grinning... [Skullhead's jaw falls to the ground as the rocket launches] ...quite chop-fallen?
No one's laughing now, and, by the way, your lower jaw's missing. [picks up the jaw from her interpreter's circle and hands it to Yakko]
[Wakko uses his shovel once more and lifts Cher out of the grave. She screams, bonks him on the head, and runs off]
[watches Cher run towards the hills] Now get you to my lady's chamber and tell her. Let her paint an inch thick. To this favour she must come. Make her laugh at that. [tosses Skullhead toward the hills]
[Skullhead runs after Cher]
Follow that woman and tell her, no matter how much makeup she wears, [Skullhead grabs Cher from behind] she's still going to croak and end up looking just like you, [Cher punches Skullhead] and see if she laughs.
[Wakko motions for Yakko to come to the grave]
Prithee, Horatio, tell me one thing:
[jumps out of her circle and joins them] What'd you find in the hole?
Our next cartoon!
[first lines] And now, Animator's Alley. Your hosts: The Warner Brothers.
Today, our guest is Cappy "Cap" Barnhouse, a pioneer in animation. Welcome, Cappy.
It's a pleasure to join ya.
Why? Were we coming apart?
Say that again?
Never mind. Cappy, you were with the Warner Bros. studio from the very beginning, right?
Yeah, I started with Warners back when all we made were pies. We just started making cartoons when people weren't buying the pies. Now, let's see. Now, that was back in 19...oh, I don't know. But it was back when we made pies. [Yakko wakes up] One day, the head guy, his name was Leon something-or-other, he says to me, he says, "Cappy, today I don't want you to make a pie. I want you to make a cartoon." [Yakko snores, Dot yawns, all Warners bored] Well, Rudy Ising and Hugh Harman and Friz and me and some other guy with a lisp was brought onboard. [the Warners all snore] And then we made our first cartoon, which was, uh...uh, Bosko and Honey. Oh, we made a few of those and... [mumbles, then snores, followed by the Warners] Pies! [the Warners wake up] We made pies. Uh, the cartoons came later.
And speaking of cartoons, let's get this show on the road.
We now return to Animator's Alley.
So, uh, then, in '43 we made Winky, the Finicky Tapeworm. He lived inside a British buffalo, Sir Poopsalot. Then we made a bunch of fish cartoons. Fish are funny creatures. [Wakko makes gookie face, Dot gasps] Cappy: We did Timmy Tuna...
Shh!
...Barney Bass, and Frieda the Overly Friendly Fluke. [Wakko and Dot spray each other with water] But the fish lip is the hardest to draw. [Yakko whispers to Dot] I've seen people scream when they see a poorly-drawn fish lip. [Dot whispers to Wakko] 'Cause they think it's a monster. But it's just a fish lip. [the Warners run away, get TV] Lips are important. You can't talk without lips. Well, you could, but you'd sound like: [babbles]
[Last lines; we see the Warner Bros. Water Tower]
[offscreen] Night, Wakko.
[offscreen] Good night, Dot.
[offscreen] Good night, Yakko.
[offscreen] Hey, I wonder what happened to Cappy.
[Back at the studio, Cappy's snoring. Yakko's model's head falls off]
[wakes up] Pies! We made pies. [snoring]
That was kind of fun.
Yeah, like waiting in line at the DMV.
Would you like to take a survey?
No. Would you like to take a hike?! [presses the button, which causes the survey lades to be sucked back inside the cash register]
[from inside; offscreen] Maybe they don't like beans.
And now, the Warners present: the senses.
[The Warners dance as the song plays]
The sense of sight is what guides us right when we go out on walks.
The sense of smell is the way to tell that you need to change your socks.
The sense of touch is what hurts so much when you bang your toe on the bed.
The sense of hearing is something good, 'cause if a tree falls in the wood, would there be a sound? You bet there would, if it landed on top your head!
Your head! If a tree lands on top of your head!
The sense of taste affects your waist.
Which makes five senses in all.
There's a sixth sense, too, but it's hard to explain. It's a psychic connection inside of your brain so you can understand people like Shirley MacLaine.
Who wear crystals they bought in the mall!
The mall! Who wear crystals they bought in the mall!
And now, the other senses!
There are scents you can smell like cologne from Chanel or the scents of expensive perfume.
There are scents of flowers we hope overpowers the kitty box next to your room.
There's a sense of pride you have deep down inside.
When you practice a sense of fair play.
There are dollars and cents that you pay at a toll.
Or the census man who is taking a poll.
And a sense of confusion we're out of control.
And they really should take us away! Away! They really should take us away!
There's a sense of humor, a sense of doom, or a sense of awe, sense of timing.
The sense of a word, a sense of absurd like trying to do all this rhyming!
There's incense.
And horse sense.
And common sense, it's true.
Sense of wonder, sense of beauty.
Sense of honor, sense of duty.
A sense of doubt, a sense of danger.
A sense of fear when you meet a stranger.
A sense of style, a sense of worth.
A sense of direction for knowing the earth.
A sense of dread as we're singing this song that it's starting to turn out completely all wrong and it's time that we end it because it's too long! [deep breath] 'Cause it just doesn't make any sense! Nonsense! This song doesn't make any sense!
Now, we would like you to begin work immediately.
[The Warners look around]
Who's like us to begin?
We would. Us. Ourselves.
[jumping up on Queen Elizabeth and looks down her throat] How many people you got in there? Hello?! HELLO?!
Get away from us!
She needs therapy. [plants the queen on a therapy couch] Alright Sybil, whom I'm speaking to now?
We insist that you stop this! You people are crazy!
Look who's talking.
[The Warners flap their mouths with their fingers as they make sounds]
We are not amused.
Well "we" certainly are.
[The Warners laugh uncontrollably]
[pretending to be a psychologist] Yes, tell me all about Petey.
Oh Petey, how I didist love that hamster so, I tooketh him to bed with me every night you know.
[to the viewers] Goodnight, everybody!
[to the Warners] Be gone, pests, and give me the bird!
We'd love to, really, but the Fox censors won't allow it!
["Video Review" song plays]
Hey, look at this store!
There's movies galore!
We've seen them a thousand times over before!
And that's why our brains don't work anymore!
The Player is a movie about finding fresh new scripts, like Rambo III and Rocky V and Star Trek Number VI.
Eva toured with Zsa Zsa and they formed a sister act, but both were Unforgiven because neither one could act.
The Hand That Rocked the Cradle once belonged to Hook, you see, but it got bored, and so it joined The Addams Family.
Amadeus was a genius, Beethoven was a dog, The Muppet Family Christmas is about a pig and frog.
There was a sled named "Rosebud" and a citizen named "Kane," he rode 'til the snow was melted, now he's Singin' in the Rain.
The Princess Bride got married to the handsome Prince of Tides, which now makes her dad, The Fisher King the Father of the Bride.
And pretty soon, you'll see them all inside the TV Guide. Along with all the stars you like to see!
Like Hitchcock and Spielberg and Oliver Stone...
Shirley MacLaine and Sylvester Stallone...
Francis Ford Coppola, Hepburn and Tracy...
Robert Zemeckis and Martin Scorsese...
Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, Woody Allen and Mia...
Robert DeNiro and Andy Garcia...
Sophia Loren, Barbra Streisand, Joan Crawford...
Paul Newman, Rock Hudson, Spike Lee, Peter Lawford...
Jack Nicholson, Brando and Marilyn Monroe....And that's all the people we know!
[to Mobster henchmen] Show these kids the door!
That's okay, we can see it from here. [Mobster henchmen pick the Warners up and carry them bodily to the door] Ooh, nice door.
Faboo!
Great hinges.
[Camera changes to outside the restaurant as the Warners are thrown flying out the door]
[to his siblings] Was it something we said?
So what'll it be Dadoo? The calamari or the squid?
The calamari is squid.
Well, how 'bout the pasta or the noodles.
The pasta is noodles.
Well, would you like red sauce or marinara?
Marinara is red sauce!
Zucchini or squash? Ham or prosciutto? Drink or beverage?
[yelling] THEY'RE ALL THE SAME!
[to Dot] Do you realize that this cuts our menu in half?
DotTress MacNeille · 109 quotes
WakkoJess Harnell · 106 quotes
SlappySherri Stoner · 45 quotes
WWarners38 quotes
SkippyNathan Ruegger · 27 quotes
SDr. Scratchansniff24 quotes
BBrain17 quotes
PPinky17 quotes
NNarrator15 quotes
TPThaddeus Plotz14 quotes
RitaBernadette Peters · 11 quotes
RuntFrank Welker · 8 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Animaniacs pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.