“Animator’s Alley/Can’t Buy a Thrill/Hollywoodchuck” quotes from Animaniacs

[first lines] And now, Animator's Alley. Your hosts: The Warner Brothers.

Today, our guest is Cappy "Cap" Barnhouse, a pioneer in animation. Welcome, Cappy.

It's a pleasure to join ya.

Why? Were we coming apart?

Say that again?

Never mind. Cappy, you were with the Warner Bros. studio from the very beginning, right?

Yeah, I started with Warners back when all we made were pies. We just started making cartoons when people weren't buying the pies. Now, let's see. Now, that was back in 19...oh, I don't know. But it was back when we made pies. [Yakko wakes up] One day, the head guy, his name was Leon something-or-other, he says to me, he says, "Cappy, today I don't want you to make a pie. I want you to make a cartoon." [Yakko snores, Dot yawns, all Warners bored] Well, Rudy Ising and Hugh Harman and Friz and me and some other guy with a lisp was brought onboard. [the Warners all snore] And then we made our first cartoon, which was, uh...uh, Bosko and Honey. Oh, we made a few of those and... [mumbles, then snores, followed by the Warners] Pies! [the Warners wake up] We made pies. Uh, the cartoons came later.

And speaking of cartoons, let's get this show on the road.

We now return to Animator's Alley.

So, uh, then, in '43 we made Winky, the Finicky Tapeworm. He lived inside a British buffalo, Sir Poopsalot. Then we made a bunch of fish cartoons. Fish are funny creatures. [Wakko makes gookie face, Dot gasps] Cappy: We did Timmy Tuna...

Shh!

...Barney Bass, and Frieda the Overly Friendly Fluke. [Wakko and Dot spray each other with water] But the fish lip is the hardest to draw. [Yakko whispers to Dot] I've seen people scream when they see a poorly-drawn fish lip. [Dot whispers to Wakko] 'Cause they think it's a monster. But it's just a fish lip. [the Warners run away, get TV] Lips are important. You can't talk without lips. Well, you could, but you'd sound like: [babbles]

We now return to Animator's Alley.

In 1954, I got a bunion. So I figures, what if a bunion could talk? [the Warners literally melt. Bubbles come up] That's when I come up with Bunion Boy. [the Warners crawl away] Bunion Boy lived on a farmer's toe. Uh, I think that was a mistake. Farmers step in things that aren't decent. Then in '57, I made Kiki the Sickly Lemur. [the Warners get models of themself and replace themselves, which automatically nods] Would you like me to talk about it? Well, all right. Kiki had no torso.

[running off] We're free! Free! Free!

[offscreen] Night, Wakko.

Wakko

[offscreen] Good night, Dot.

Dot

[offscreen] Good night, Yakko.

[offscreen] Hey, I wonder what happened to Cappy.

[wakes up] Pies! We made pies. [snoring]