[Giving Billy's eulogy] I've heard it said, that as you're about to pass into the next world, the final truth of this world... hits you. And the last thing Billy spoke about, right before he sat down in the courthouse, was love. How it was all that mattered. He um... He seemed so lost in these last few months, but looking at him in the courthouse right before he died, he... He suddenly seemed so... found. He um, said to me, recently, he said, 'It's stronger than death.' And I wasn't sure what he meant. And now I am. When we were little, we would talk about this day... Well actually, we would sing about it. He would sing this song: 'And when I die... and when I'm gone... there'll be one child born... in a world, to carry on.' And that child... that child has big shoes to fill. [Looks up at Billy directly, then continues] Billy Thomas, With all of my heart... Forever. [She then returns to addressing the rest of the mourners, then smiles] Oh, and uh... As for Heaven? [Then slams her fist into the palm of her hand, and the opening of "A New Man in Town" explodes into the church as the choir rises to sing and the mourners begin to dance and clap, celebrating the life of Billy Thomas]
S3 E16Boy Next Door
S3 E21Ally McBeal: The Musical, Almost
Nelle, whatever you believe my opinion of you is, I can't see it wounding you to such depths that...My disapproval of you, it only went to your...
Being a "rich bitch ice queen elitist cold snob." In case you're in search of the words.
S4 E2Girl's Night Out
I have a friend who refuses to get a pet because he says in the end they die and it's just too hard... maybe it's the same with relationship.
How DARE you.
I didn't TELL him!
You were ABOUT to!
No, no, no. I was just ...
You had NO right.
Mark is a FRIEND of mine!
I've HAD boyfriends before. Things have been JUST fine.
They have? Wait, how?
I tell them I'm Catholic.
I'm confused. Catholic girls have penises? 'Cause I thought ...
I tell them I'm against pre-marital sex!
No, I'm still confused. What other kind of sex IS there?
S4 E3Two's a Crowd
It's not easy finding a person to love in this world. whoever you end up with, she won't be perfect.
S4 E7Love on Holiday
You can sit anywhere you like. Is there a required time limit thing?
For What?
Our date.
Is this it? A trip to your office?
I'm busy. I can talk for five minutes to make it official.
Are you serious?
You really expect me to date a man who bids on women at auctions?
If I'm willing to date a woman who allows herself to be bought.
That was for charity.
Yes. And you seem like a real giver.
[Holds up a clock] Hey! What do you know? Time's up.
Guess it flies when you're having fun.
Let's see if you can fly, Superman. I'll open a window.
S4 E9Reasons to Believe
It's very hard to make any sense of this without - well, at least with any degree of persuasion.
Well, does it have to make sense? I mean, the best things don't. Do they?
Such as?
Love... Beauty is another - it's in the eye of the beholder. Even humor doesn't make sense, when you think about it - sense of humor? Who can explain what people find funny? I mean, to me, it's the insistence on making sense that doesn't make sense.
S4 E10The Ex-Files
Ling, uh, do you still like this guy?
No! No, I- I'm with Richard now. I- I... I might... I mean, he's not Richard.
Oh, come on. Richard has the depth of an ashtray. He's got nothing to offer but money and sperm, and you know it.
You having fun with this case?
It's okay. I prefer being a plaintiff, but a defendant's nice too. I get a martyr glow.
So Jackson Duper, you don't tell a woman your real name?
Hey, for all I knew...
You knew me well enough to go to bed with me.
Look...
Why the alias? You wanted?
No.
Certainly not by me.
Excellent. Do I get to talk
Fine. Quick, think up something.
Look...
We're back to look.
Hey...
We're back to hey.
Ling...
How do you know my real name? Oh that's right, I gave it to you. What an odd thing to do.
[Ally is outraged when Ling convinces a dying boy that he could sue God]
Do you know how his father died?
No. Do you?
Yes, I overheard the nurses talking. He was crushed by a tree that was struck by lightning. THAT was an act of God, so we go after the Church, HOUSE of God. I need to pee.
In a pinch, I sometimes allude to not wearing any underwear.
I won't be in that pinch.
Ally, what makes your problems so much bigger than everybody else's?
They're mine.
Are you always such a bitchy little thing?
Bitchy?
Coming in here, insulting the Talmud, insulting me!
What kind of rabbi calls somebody bitchy?
I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
'Cause I'm bitchy? God has no love for the bitchy?
Get out.
Have no fear, Nelle, that girl is a bagel!
Bagel?
[pauses] I meant to say 'toast.'
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Ally McBeal pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.