Bridget quotes from 8 Simple Rules

Rory

I would appreciate it if you could stay off the phone for a while. There are going to be a lot of women calling me.

Bridget

Calling you what? Geek?

Kerry

Perv?

Bridget

Freak?

Kerry

Loser?

Rory

Not anymore.

Kerry

They had a lemonade stand.

Cate

That's cute!

Kerry

They're in high school!

Bridget

Yeah, it's more like a lame-o-nade stand!

Kerry

And last week, they had a cookie stand!

Bridget

Yeah, it's more like a lame-o-cookie stand!

Kerry

And they even had a mud pie stand!

Bridget

Yeah, it's more like a...I got nothing.

Bridget

I am like so back on top with these things! (names her boobs) Hello, Mary Kate! Hello, Ashley!

Rory

Talk about a "Full House."

Bridget

I never would of got this far before. Dad would never let me go out like this. He would of definetly sent me up stairs to change and tell me to cover myself up in some hideous sweater and then give me a one hour lecture on how I should respect myself and how guys are only out for one thing and I always hated when he did that! I just want my dad back!

Cate

Bridget-

Bridget

Leave me alone!

Bridget

What?

Kerry

I just think it's for some girl who has to try really hard and you don't. You should respect yourself like dad was always telling you to. You deserve the best.

Bridget

You deserve the best too.

Kerry

No, I don't.

Bridget

No, listen. What Kyle said to you, he meant it.

Kerry

How do you know?

Bridget

Kyle and I went out for a really long time.

Kerry

Yeah.

Bridget

He never said it to me.

Bridget

Kerry, are those my earrings? They are! God, first you steal my popularity & then my earrings?

Kerry

You forgot about your boyfriend!

Paul

Bridget, I think it's an honor your mother is going to teach you sexual education. After all, she taught me.

Ew!

Bridget

Do you guys not understand what situation I am in here? I mean, Donny Doyle's coming in this weekend to see me.

Paul

So?

Bridget

So, people already perceive my dating Donny Doyle as a slap in the face! I mean, you know, he's older and he goes to the naval academy instead of his school, and then Danielle's going to this party this weekend, she's all, "You better be there," and I'm all, "Uh, yeah," but Donny's all, "Oh, no, I don't want to share you," which is actually very sweet when you think about it, but it's just the sort of thing that Danielle's gonna use against me, and then (points at Cate) you have to go and exacerbate the whole thing by teaching sex ed at my school!

Rory

On the bright side, she did say "exacerbate."

Bridget

Why do bad things always happen to me?

Paul

Nothing bad ever happens to you.

Bridget

Oh, yeah.

It wasn't so much a fight as-

Bridget

That is so cool.

A battle to the death

Cate

(on the phone) Hello? Yeah, this is Mrs. Hennessy.

Kerry

Gosh, you are so jealous.

Bridget

Oh, please, I debuted at number two on the hot list.

Rory

Yeah, but she didn't have to do the things you did to get on it.

Kerry

(nervously) Mom?

Cate

(fighting back tears) My... my keys, where are my keys?

Kerry

Mom, what's going on?

Cate

Oh, my... (dashes out the back door)

(uneasily) Mom? Mom!

Kerry

Bridge? Grandma and Gramps are here.

Bridget

Is Dad with them?

Kerry

No.

Bridget

Well, then I really don't give a damn.

Bridget

The last words I said to Dad were, "I hate you."

Cate

Oh...

Bridget

(guilt-ridden) He wouldn't let me borrow his stupid car, and I said "I hate you." I had my dad, and the last thing I ever said to him was "I hate you."

Cate

Aw, honey. I think those were the first words you said to him, also.

Kerry

My last words were an insult, too. He was wearing his Michigan sweatshirt with chinos, and I told him there weren't enough Queer Eyes in all of San Francisco to help him.

Cate

Well, I sent him to the store for milk, so the last thing he heard out of me was, "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah." You know what his last words to me were? "Hasta la vista, baby."

Bridget

No, I said it's what I'm most thankful for.

Jim

And, what about you, Cate? What are you thankful for?

Cate

Well, I'm thankful for my wonderful children, and for my great dad and my mom even though she couldn't be here.

Jim

That's what I'm thankful for.

Cate

Hey, Bridg. I thought I heard something up here. What are you doing?

Bridget

Reading The Diary of Anne Frank. Mom, I don't think I can do this.

Cate

Well, honey, when you get to a word you don't know, just sound it out.

Bridget

I mean, how could I have taken on the role of Anne Frank? She's just so incredibly wise and brave. I mean, I came up here to see what it was like to be her. I just can't do her justice. I can't.

Cate

Of course you can.

Bridget

I know you never see this side of me, but it's true. Sometimes I can be a little bit superficial. I'm just not Anne material. Think I should quit? Because it's not like I'd be letting anybody down. There are tons of girls that could do a way better job than I can. I should quit, right?

Cate

Well...do you want to quit?

Bridget

No. I don't wanna quit. But I don't wanna embarrass myself. I don't wanna embarrass you either.

Cate

Oh, that's just crazy, honey. But do you want to quit?

Bridget

I don't know what else to do. I'm out of my depth.

Cate

Wow, you really did read the book. Well...I don't think you should quit. I think you can do it. I know you can do it.

Bridget

It just doesn't seem right that I play Anne. We're nothing alike. I mean, we have a nice attic, and a nice house...I can go to sleep at night when it's dark, in a warm bed...I can leave whenever I want...I don't know, my life is easy. I just have not experienced that kind of hardship.

Cate

Well, I can't imagine anyone playing the part has that kind of experience, but an actor finds things to draw on. You know, you have had your share of sadness. Start there.

Jim

Bridget, you're not going back to that job.

Bridget

You're not my parent. You're my grandparent. You're supposed to give me money and presents and be cute.