Cate quotes from 8 Simple Rules

Cate

(sarcastically) I remember her as just such a happy little girl on the playground, smoking.

Cate

Yeah, I know they mean well, but I'm starting to feel like I'm in some kind of circus where the price of admission is a casserole. Step right up and see the grieving widow.

Cate

(to Kerry) Now look, we should all be supportive. We should be celebrating. Your sister got the lead in... (in disbelief) Anne Frank?

Cate

(reading Paul's last article) Okay readers, today we're having a little pop quiz, it's multiple choice, so sharpen your number 2 pencils and put your thinking caps on. Ready? Here's a quote: "Dad, you're an idiot." Now, contestants, this was said to me because of which of the following transgressions? A: Coming to the breakfast table wearing pajamas and black socks? B: Asking my oldest daughter if that guy I saw her talking to yesterday at school was her boyfriend? C: Referring to rapper Fiddy Cent as "Fifty Cents"? or D: Entering the room? Okay, pencils down. Actually it was a trick question. The answer is all of the above. Now do you know how many times I called my father an idiot? Zero. Why? Because I feared him. Back then we didn't share our deep personal feelings, our deepest conversations usually revolved around the Tigers bull pen. But my kids, I can't get them to shut up! There's not a feeling that my kids are afraid to express over and over and over. And my wife reassures me this is a good thing over and over and over, and she's always right. So do I wish that my kids feared me? Well my house would be quieter, and I'd spend a lot less time in the bathroom, but no. Because I know that whenever they insult me whether it's a "You're an idiot," "You're a geek," or an "I hate you," an "I love you" isn't far behind. And it's the knowledge that my wife and kids love me that makes it safe for me to wear pajamas and black socks to the breakfast table.

Cate

I just got here. I forgot to pick up my allergy medicine. Do you think you can drop by the pharmacy?

Paul

Oh man. You know I hate picking up that stuff.

Cate

No, no, no. It's really allergy medicine this time.

Cate

Keep Bridget off the phone and out of the mall.

Paul

I'm a man, not a miracle worker.

Paul

Come on Cate, dance with me.

Cate

Oh, no, I'm not going to embarrass my daughter.

Paul

Fine, I'll dance by myself.

Rory

Can I sit in the cart?

Cate

No!

Paul

I'm a little stunned. Why would Kerry even want to be cheerleader?

Cate

Same reason you wanted to be a cheerleader.

Paul

Yell captain.

Cate

Paul, give it a rest. You can't make the kids play with you.

Paul

Play with me? They live in my house and don't even like me. They're not kids. They're cats.

Bridget

Dad, do we really have to spend the night in that stupid treehouse again? We do it every single year.

Cate

Every single year.

Paul

Come on. It's our last Halloween tradition. Don't grumble, Bridget. You and Kerry won't trick or treat with me anymore, so now it's just Man With Ax In Head and Little Man With Ax In Head.

Cate

So what's the sudden interest after all my years of begging?

Paul

Well Cate, I just figured it's time. Our daughters are maturing and you know it would be foolish of me not to use expert resources available right at my fingertips.

Cate

They've beaten you down, haven't they?

Paul

They're killing me by inches.

Paul

(about the girls) Well, it's official. They hate me again.

Cate

Aw, congratulations. (holds up two tickets) Maybe these'll make you feel better.

Paul

Red Wings, center ice? Where did you get these?

Cate

(imitating Anthony) Shoot. I was kickin' wit my partner Anthony W., and he gave me the 411 on how he got B to the K all grounded and whatnot. He was all, "Damn, Mrs. Henn, that's cold! I gots to make dat right!" So he hooked me these fazoon duckets. Know what I mean?

Paul

One more smart remark like that and there will be a consequence.

Kerry

My life is a consequence.

Cate

You know honey, that would have more impact if you didn't say it every day.

Cate

You know I think this family should go to visit Grandma and Grandpa in Sarasota. We'd hang out in the sun. It will be relaxing. We'll go swimming and I don't have to cook.

Paul

Cate, your parents don't like me.

Cate

I know that, honey and I weighed that, but I still have to go with don't have to cook.