Johnson quotes from Yu-Gi-Oh!

He used his Deck Master's special ability right away. Not bad, but this trial has just begun.

Pegasus

Now, gentlemen, Let's see if I understand your proposition. Seto kaiba has abandoned his corporate station, And now you five wish to seize control of kaibacorp. You then want to merge with my company, And you'd like me to handle any messy details, yes?

Precisely, mr. Pegasus. With our money and your leadership, We will easily take control of kaibacorp.

Pegasus

Do tell.

For our plan to succeed, Kaiba must be taken out of the picture... Permanently.

However, there is one catch. As per the corporate by laws, Only a kaiba family member can legally control kaibacorp.

Pegasus

Hmm.

To that end, pegasus, We recommend kidnapping kaiba's brother mokuba. In name, he will control kaibacorp, But we will control him.

Do these things for us And we will lay all of kaibacorp's technology at your feet.

Pegasus

Agreed. The elder kaiba shall meet with an accident, And the younger kaiba will be captured.

Excellent. But we have one final condition.

The brat who beat kaiba Has tarnished kaibacorp's good name, And we must insist that you restore it.

Pegasus

Well, how fortuitous. Plans for me to duel Yugi are already under way. Now, to show that I truly am the man for this job-- Kemo, bring me young Kaiba, would you?

Mokuba

Noooo! Aah! Unh! Let me go, you creeps. I heard everything, and when I tell my big brother, you're gonna--

Pegasus

You see, gentlemen? This is how efficiently You can expect me to handle our business. Young Kaiba is captured, Yugi will be defeated, And Seto Kaiba will bother us no more. Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Ta-ta, Virtual Kaiba. Soon that will happen to the real McCoy! You see, if your deck master is destroyed, you automatically lose the duel, regardless of life points. And when each of you loses a duel, one of us will take over your body!

Seto Kaiba

I've heard enough! I've defeated you five white-collar has-beens once before and I can easily do it again! No matter what the rules are, I'll still take you down!

Joey

Let us out of here, you crotchety old cranks!

We've never even left this room, you fools!

But make no mistake, you kids aren't going anywhere for a long while.

Huh?

You're trapped and your only chance of escape is to defeat each of us in a virtual duel.

Mokuba

There's no way you're gonna get away with this, you stuffed shirts!

Joey

Yeah! We'll kick your big-business butts!

Joey, wait!

Joey

Don't worry, Serenity. We can whip these five geezers one, two, tree. I promise we'll win. And I've never broken a promise to you.

Then promise you'll be careful, Okay.

Joey

Deal.

If we stick together, they won't stand a chance!

Duke

Don't worry, I got your back, man.

Tristan

Me too!

Joey

Pass the jam, 'cause these guys are toast !

Hold on, guys. They never said which of us will actually have to duel.

[chucking] Good question, kid. Just to make sure that you all suffer equally, we'll be dueling against every one of you brats!

Remember, we need to take over five bodies. So the first five of you to lose will have the honor of gaining our minds while yours stay trapped here!

In your dreams!

Ever since you destroyed our bodies, all we've had are our dreams, Mr. Kaiba! Until now! The time has come to make our dreams a reality, by escaping from this virtual abyss and leaving you here in our place for all eternity! [The Big Five evil laughing]

So much for the Big Five. I should never have hired those corporate clowns!

[on virtual screen] Excellent dueling, Téa!

[on virtual screen] Thanks, Yugi.

How could they be out-dueled by these two in a virtual world where I make all the rules? If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself, so perhaps it's time for me to step in. I'll make sure they never leave this place!

On behalf of myself and the Big Five, I want to offer your our most sincere apologies, Noah.

Johnson, please.

Let me explain!

There's nothing to explain! You five failed me for the last time! Now you're all fired!

Just hear me out, sir.

Your slick lawyer talk won't get you out of this one, Johnson, so don't even try it. So far your partners Gansley and Crump each suffered an embarrassing defeat. So why should I believe the rest of you won't fail? I have no choice, Johnson. I must dispose of you all!

Please, Noah! Don't do it! We've analyzed our attack patterns and we come up with a solid dueling strategy that is guaranteed to bring success, sir! Understand our position. The Big Five are desperate to defeat these brats. It's the only way we can take over their bodies and leave the cyber world behind! We can't let them win!

Very well. I'll give you a chance to redeem yourself. Don't let me down.

You won't be sorry.

No. 'Cause if they fail me again, he will be the sorry one. Their failures are a reflection of me. And I can't allow Yugi and his friends to make me look like a failure.

Objection. Before we begin, you have to choose a monster from your deck to serve as your Deck Master.

Joey

Whatever. [looks through his cards] This shouldn't be too hard. Folks, we have a winner! So, meet my Deck Master, Flame Swordsman! As long as this guy's standing next to me, judge, there's no way I can possibly lose this duel!

You have my word as your Deck Master that I will serve you well and guide you through this duel.

Joey

[thinking] Awesome! He talks!

I assure you we shall defeat our opponent.

As you know, I will be acting as my own Deck Master. So this court is now in session. [Duel begins] Since we're in my courtroom, I'll begin this duel. Watch and learn. Now, I call Hysteric Angel to the stand. She'll make sure you the maximum sentence.

Joey

[annoyingly unimpressed] That is the most annoying monster I have ever seen! She looks just like you do, Johnson!

Silence. It's time to call out your first witness.

Joey

Yes, your Honor.

I summon Curtain of the Dark Ones. Then, I reveal my facedown card-- activate Polymerization to fuse together my Mystical Elf and my Curtain of the Dark Ones.

Joey

[thinking] Whatever monster he's creating will get sucked right into my Bottomless Trap Hole!

Meet Kamionwizard!

Joey

[disappointed; thinking] Aw, man. It's only got 1300 attack points!

You're up to something. Oh, well, I'm not too worried. Because I have this card! Ready, Joseph? Reveal the magic card, Leading Question! This card adds 800 attack points to any monster that's made up of two other monsters fused together. So my Kamionwizard is now stronger than your Panther Warrior. Wizard, attack now!

Joey

Not so fast, Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Gruesome! You triggered my trap! Go, Skull Dice! The higher I roll, the more attack points your monster loses! [the dice lands on a six] Yeah!

[smirking] Perhaps he should take a closer look. [changes the dice to a one]

Joey

WHAT?! A ONE?! NO WAY! All right, I don't know how you did that, but I got my eye on you!

In my courtroom, twisting the facts is perfectly legal, especially when it helps me!

Joey

I summon Swordsman of Landstar! And then… I'll play this, my Graceful Dice! Yeah! Raise my Swordsman's attack points with a high roll! [the dice lands on a six] All right, it worked!

[smirking] Not quite. [changes the dice to a one]

Joey

[screams overwhelmingly] WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE ALL THIS?!

I've never seen him have such terrible luck before. Poor Joey.

[as Joey activates his Gamble trap card; to Yugi] Gamble?

Yep. It's a risky card, Téa, but if it works, it can help Joey turn this entire duel around, and it starts with a coin.

And what exactly is so risky about it, Yugi?

Well, Joey flips a coin in the air, then he calls heads or tails, and if he's right, he gets to draw five cards, but if he's wrong, Joey's next turn gets skipped and he can't afford to let that happen. It could cost him the entire duel!

He can take all the risks he wants, because in my virtual courtroom, I control everything!

TIME OUT! Stop the duel!

What's the deal?

Noah! You can't, sir, please! I'm only a few moves away from taking over this fool's body!

You don't deserve that prize, Johnson! Not after what you just pulled!

Joey

So, he is a cheater.

Sad to say it's true. The honorable Judge Man is nothing but a fraud who's been cheating you from the very beginning. He's been using my virtual technology to tamper with your dice rolls.

Joey

[to Johnson; enraged] How 'bout I tamper with your face?! Mr. So-Called-Man-Of-Justice, you big, fat fake!

But, Noah, I couldn't risk losing this! Please, you must understand me! I can't take living in this virtual prison for one moment longer! It's torture!

Your excuses bore me! I brought you five into my virtual world with the understanding that under my leadership, you would defeat Seto Kaiba and his little friends. But if you cheat, I can't prove that I'm truly more deserving than him!

Than me?! More deserving of what?

For years, I've lived in Seto's shadow, always trying to prove that I'm the better one! I should be the president of Kaiba Corp, not him! And it's about time I've proven to Gozaburo Kaiba that he should have left the company to me!

What?! [thinking] But my stepfather, Gozaburo, has been missing without a trace for over five years! And why would Noah want to prove something to him, anyway?! This kid is not who he seems to be! But who is he?

Joey

Excuse me, boys. If I may interrupt this little quarrel for just a second, the defendant would like to speak. [thinking] If Johnson plays by the rules, I may still be able to win this!

Sorry, but this doesn't concern you. Johnson, it's time for me to do something that I should have done the day I met you!

Noah, please, don't!

You four are absolutely pathetic! You lost your duels, So you decided to just take what you wanted by force. Which is something I won't tolerate! Is that clear!? I hired you fools to duel for me. So by losing and then cheating you make me look weak!

Let us explain, Please...sir!

We understand that you have laws But we must escape from this place!

And to do that we need bodies!

You already have one. That Tristan kid!

One won't do! Sir...we need five bodies so we can all escape!

Greetings. I just came to say farewell before I go. Now that I have a body of my own I'm ready to escape to the real world!

Nezbitt!

Technically, my robots and I are the only ones that won a duel. So Tristan's body belongs to me now. A deal's a deal, right gentlemen!?

You lost that duel!

Crump is right, those kids defeated you Nezbitt!

Therefore that body isn't your property! You're guilty of seizing control of somebody else's personal possession!

Not quite.

I'm the one calling all the shots here So I'll decide what's wrong and right.

So can I go?

Not yet, I have a much better idea, So listen up.

Huh?

All five of you will share Tristan's body in a duel against Seto's strongest rival, Yugi Muto. Defeat him and I'll prove once and for all That I deserve control of Seto's empire! And you'll get five bodies.

We won't fail you... Master.

We can't. The odds of us disappointing you are zero percent.

Thank you sir. Good day.

[Thinking] It better be!

Seto Kaiba

[looks back up] Why don't you worried about him instead.

Look guys, up there!

Tristan!

Joey

That's not Tristan, remember? [as Seto Kaiba leaves off alone to find Mokuba himself]

Duke

It's the techno geek of the Big Five, Nezbitt, even though he kicked his nerdy butt in that duel, he still took Tristan's body!

I'm not alone in here!

Today's special is-- five for one!

And the verdict is in.

Our combined force will destroy you!

They're all using Tristan's body!

Give him back!

Listen, Yugi! There's only one way we'll return your friend.

[laughs] But believe me, Junior, the odds are in our favor!

Hey, that's Crump! Sicko!

All right! Tell us what we have to do to get Tristan back from your control!

Why duel us! Win, and he's yours!

Hold on! What's this about returning the body? We never discussed that! I'm the one who won this body and I won't give it up!

Nezbitt, it belongs to all of us now, and this was a group decision!

[chuckles] I can't believe you two are actually arguing as if we're going to keep our word.

Now, let's duel, Yugi!

You five are on!

Let's do this… for Tristan!

Joey

Hold it right there! Your man's a little off if you get in my drift. Five on one's are even, so count me in!

Are you sure?

Joey

Yeah. No question. The two of us are a team, Yugi. Now, let's waste these five suits!

Yes, and together, we'll save Tristan.

Fine, Yugi. Five on two.

When you two lose this duel, you and your friends will be sentenced to an eternity in this digital dungeon!

Joey

You're the one who's going down, Johnson! I beat you once and I'll beat you again!

Yes, but now we're up against all five of them!

That's right, I'm not alone in here. Now then…

I can't believe the Big Five are all in Tristan's body!

Tristan

Those business geeks are sharing me like I'm a corporate condo!

My first maneuver should seem familiar to you, Joseph. The move's called, Clear the Courtroom! It's Judge Man's Deck Master ability!

Joey

Oh, no! Not this move!

Oh, yes! First, I'll give 1,000 my Life Points. Proceed, Your Honor. Prosecute all of their monsters to the full extent of the law!

All four of our monsters are gone now.

But that's not all I've done.

Joey

What?!

Have you forgotten already, Joseph? Next, you'll both lose 500 Life Points for each monster that I've crushed.

Tristan

If they keep this up, I'll never get my body back!

Don't worry, Tristan. Yugi and my brother are gonna win this!

Now that I've cleared the field of all of your monsters, it's time to work on your Life Points! I call Hysteric Angel to the stand! And now, I think our spectators are really going to enjoy this next move. Especially that little monkey-boy up there. [Tristan shrieks angrily] Time to put this body to good use! Now, Hysteric Angel, attack Joseph's Life Points directly!

Joey

Well, now I remember why I love your lawyers so much.

If you loved that one, just wait 'til my next move! Angel, use my Catapult Turtle's special ability to launch yourself at the defendant, Mr. Joseph Wheeler!

I activate Revenge Sacrifice!

Joey

No!

This card allows me to sacrifice the monster you just attacked me with! So consider your Rocket Warrior dismissed! And I'll use it to summon a new monster. [laughs] So please welcome to the stand, Machine King! This mechanical menace gains an additional 100 attack points for every machine monster in play, including itself! The decision is unanimous! You two don't stand a chance!

Joey

All right, Yuge! Finish this guy!

I'll try. [thinking] All right, I need to play Des Volstgalph, but, in order to summon it the field, I need to sacrifice another monster first. And I have no other monsters! Not yet, anyway! [speaking] It's my move, so here goes! [draws; thinking] This is just what I needed! It's The Rock Spirit monster card! But, in order to use it, I first have to take a monster out of my graveyard and remove it from the game. I was forced to send my Buster Blader to the graveyard before, so I guess I'll take him out of play. [speaking] First, I'll remove my Buster Blader from the game in order to summon, The Rock Spirit! But I'm afraid that's not all, Johnson! Next, I'll sacrifice my Spirit to summon this, Des Voltsgalph!

Joey

[thinking] What? Is he serious?!

And now I'll place a card facedown and end my turn.