Wait wait wait...How am I supposed to know who the real Diana is?
Well if you come across a woman and she looks exactly like me and she displays any interest in you whatsoever as a man, that's the bad one.
She is bad! Real bad...
S2 E6Warrior...Princess...Tramp
MMeg
Hold it right there. In the blink of an eye I can split the skull of anyone who moves with my trusty...shamrock!
S2 E7Intimate Strangers
Do you know how boring Tartarus can be. Same old torture everyday, everyday.
CXCallisto/Xena
Look into my eyes old woman, Xena's not home.
Who are you?
CXCallisto/Xena
Just another loving daughter.
XCXena/Callisto
A long time ago you told me the cycle of hate has to end and the only way to end it is through love. It's a hard lesson to learn. Callisto couldn't possibly know or understand that.
XCXena/Callisto
'Cause when you think of the dead...
CSCallisto's Mother
...the dead can hear you.
S2 E8Ten Little Warlords
Pain! So that's what it feels like. Not so bad really.
Oh ya like it, huh? Well there's plenty more where that came from.
Are you alright?
I've been hanged, swung over a fire and nearly shishkabobed on razor sharp spikes! How do you mortals get from day to day?
S2 E9A Solstice Carol
Well-- what? Oh. I don't have a gift for you.
Gabrielle, you are a gift to me
S2 E10The Xena Scrolls
JJanice
Now, that's no way to treat a lady. Run along now, boys. I don't have time to play.
Now, you listen to me. Gabrielle was never useless. She cared for others more than herself
S2 E11Here She Comes ... Miss Amphipolis
Xena! I was just talking about you! Sort of.
Beauty contest!! You sent urgent word for us to see some underdressed, overdeveloped bimbos in a beauty contest!
Wake me when you get to the urgent part!
Now why don't you just cancel the pageant?
Lord Clairon's tried that. Each of these guys is so invested in winning, nobody wants to quit first. The way I see it – what we need is a contestant to keep an eye on things from the inside.
Oh, no, no, no! Don't even look at me. Now you know how I feel about these women being victimized by meat markets.
She's right. But war makes everyone a victim. So... meet Miss Amphipolis.
Looking for this? Now I want some straight answers.
AMiss Artifice
you've got the wrong girl. Okay, okay, I was just kidding where's you're sense of humor?
Gee, I must have sweated it out. That you idea of funny too?
AArtifice
I was just trying to scare you.
Why did you want to scare me?
AArtifice
because I knew you knew. You know about me. And I didn't want you telling anyone. But when I came back to unlock the door, you had already gone.
What made you think I would tell.
AArtifice
You really don't get it do you? I guess being born a woman, you wouldn't. This is a chance for me to use a part of me most people usually laugh at. Or worse. The part I usually have to hide. Only here, that part works for me, see?
I don't think so.
AArtifice
Look, I don't expect you to understand. And I'm sorry I got you steamed, I just hope you'll let me quit the pageant in private instead of going public with it.
No way. May the best person win.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Xena: Warrior Princess pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.