Vince quotes from What I Like About You

Val

(loud whisper) What is wrong with you?

Holly

(loud whisper) Me? What is wrong with you?

Val

(loud whisper) I just want five minutes alone with Dad so I can show him what a success I've become.

Holly

(loud whisper) Well, I really want him to like Vince, and Vince has already made a horrible impression!

Vince

Okay, you're not whispering.

Holly

Did you see the impression that Vince left? Dad is only here for two days and every second is crucial!

Vince

Again, within earshot!

Vic

Um, okay, well, the good news is that this is way bigger than both of your secrets.

Vince

Oh, ho ho, my cheese pants pale by comparison!

Lauren

Hi! Sorry, I'm late. I wanted to make my grand entrance for the Silver Fox.

Vince

Gay.

Tina

Hey guys. This place is awesome. Your dad and Toshi did a great job decorating.

Vince

Gay.

Vince

Hey, man, hey! Can I talk you about something? It's kinda embarrassing.

Gary

Oh, say no more. Use the cream from the third shelf in the medicine cabinet, takes away everything.

Vince

Gary, it's about Holly.

Gary

Oh. Tell Holly to use the cream from the third shelf in the medicine cabinet -

Vince

Gary, it's not about that. I saw Holly's paycheque - it's huge. I can't stop thinking about it, man. She makes so much more money than me.

Gary

And?

Vince

And it bugs me. I mean I'm the man. I'm supposed to be the provider.

Gary

No, no, you're the man because you found yourself a rich girlfriend. High five!

Vince

So, it wouldn't bother you that your girlfriend makes twice as much money as you?

Gary

Look, why make it a problem when there is no problem? You love her, she loves you.

Vince

Yeah, but it bugs me that she-

Gary

Okay, so you think that Holly is so far beneath you that she isn't entitled to make more money that you?

Vince

No, it's just that-

Gary

Oh, so then she doesn't deserve to make more money.

Vince

No, she deserves-

Gary

Then it's your stupid pride.

Vince

Oh... that could be it.

Gary

Now, what are you going to do about it?

Vince

I'm gonna get past it. Try to get past it.

Gary

No, you're gonna do it. Because real men get past it. Now, are you a real man?

Vince

Raah!

Gary

Weird, man, but real man.

Gary

Now, you know you're gonna have to pay for that.

Vince

Put it on Holly's tab. A real man can let his woman pay for his muffin.

Gary

Now, that's what I'm talkin' about. Keep it pimpin, player, keep it pimpin.

Vince

Can't do it, Gary. Tried be cool, but I cannot be a kept man.

Gary

You ain't trying hard enough.

Gary

You know what? Your-your hair is so Footloose!

Vince

You did NOT just drag Kevin Bacon into this!

Holly

(gasps) Oh my gosh, you're on a bus bench? Vince, look how big your head is!

Vince

I know! I have a big head. People trust people with big heads.

Holly

Hmm, yes, you know what, you're right! Who wouldn't want to buy an apartment from that big head?

Holly

So it's decided then?

Vince

We're... thinking.

Holly

Guess I shouldn't wear this while we're thinking. (hands Vince her bracelet)

Vince

Val gave you that.

Holly

Oh. (puts her bracelet back on) Then we're good.

Don't say a word.

Holly

(back turned, thinking its Vince) Oh, I won't--

Vince

Holly.

Holly

Ohh!

Just give me all your money.

Holly

Yes, and our valuables.

Yeh-yeah. Thanks!

Holly

Okay, if that what you want to believe, that's fine. But I know something you don't know.

Vince

What do you know?

Holly

I can't tell you. I promised Robyn that I wouldn't tell.

Vince

What are you talking about?

Holly

If I tell you what I promised, then I would be telling you.

Vince

Tell me.

Holly

I can't.

Officer Rubin

Can you tell me?

Holly

Well, if Robyn never said that I couldn't tell you. So, Robyn fired him, remember?

Vince

She had every-

Holly

Remember how you were rehired five minutes later? Did you ever wonder why?

Officer Rubin

Why?

Holly

Because I went back that day to beg for Robyn to give you your job back. (to Rubin) And instead I struck a deal with the Devil.

Officer Rubin

Oh my god!

Holly

I know, right?

Vince

I can't believe it - why didn't you ever tell me?

Officer Rubin

Uh, she promised!