Val quotes from What I Like About You

Gary

Well, I say we celebrate.

Val

Oh, not with a song...

Holly

Let's celebrate sitting down.

Holly

I quit.

Val

What, you can't quit! You're on a roll.

Jeff

You're fired.

Holly

Thank you.

Lauren

Where's the can?

Val

God, I used to know.

I'm not gay.

Val

Well, your bedroom is.

Val

You've wanted this apartment for the past five years. I can't believe you would stoop this low to get it.

Hey, nobody's making you leave, Val. Just your sister.

Val

Yeah, but you know that if she goes, I'll go with her.

Awwww. How cute. What could be sweeter than two sisters who love each other? Oh, I know. (points to Val's window) Me having a latte every morning on that balcony!

Holly

So, how old were you the first time you did it?

Val

Eight...years older than you are now!

Holly

Now, can I ask you a question?

Val

Hmm?

Holly

Were you really 24 your first time?

Val

No.

Holly

I knew it!

Val

I've never done it!

Val

Hey. Where have you been?

Holly

Dinner with Henry. We had a magical mystical urge to eat.

Val

Do these pants make my bottom look big?

Holly

"Bottom?!" You're so Amish!

Val

Peter says I've got to be a team player. I have always been a team player, I just happen to hate this team.

Holly

If you hate work so much, why don't you just quit? Start your own company and you can have everything exactly the way you want it. Hire all women and maybe a sassy gay guy!

Val

(circles a finger around Holly's head) Oh, I wish I lived in there, I bet it's full of funny cartoons and stuff.

Holly

Look, Val, if this is about money, I've got 1300... no... 1100... I've got $75 in my savings account! It's yours.

Here, call the wife and tell her that Mike has arranged for you to take her out on the town, anywhere she wants to go, anything she wants do. If it's furry, get it. If it's sparkly, get it. I want this credit card company to call me up scared.

Val

So you're talking some hot girl on girl shopping.

Holly

Did you figure out your new company's name?

Val

Yeah.

Holly

Well, what is it?

Val

Val Co.

Holly

Val Co.?

Val

You'll like it when you see it with the logo.

Holly

Does it cover up the name "Val Co." ?

Holly

well i think the hobo around the corner will like it

Val

People from Yale are such jackasses.

Vince

Hey! My father went to Yale!

Val

Ooh. Sorry. I'm sure he was a very nice man.

Vince

No, I'm just kidding. My father's a loser.

Look at you!

Val

Look at you!

I'd rather look at you.

Lauren

Sweet mother of God!

Val

Holy crap!

Damn!