Do these pants make my bottom look big?
"Bottom?!" You're so Amish!
(shouting to Henry, upset and angry) You know me, you know who I am! If-if we've been dating long enough for you to know that if I could have been there I would have! And that, you know, I'm sorry but something came up and I don't feel that I should be punished for that! And to be perfectly honest, I think you're being a little bit of a bitch right now!
I have to have major surgery...
Oh my God, what is it?
I have to have my wisdom teeth removed.(laughs)....
... No one knows they're going into a (hush tone) coma when they go into a (hush tone) coma.
Peter says I've got to be a team player. I have always been a team player, I just happen to hate this team.
If you hate work so much, why don't you just quit? Start your own company and you can have everything exactly the way you want it. Hire all women and maybe a sassy gay guy!
(circles a finger around Holly's head) Oh, I wish I lived in there, I bet it's full of funny cartoons and stuff.
Look, Val, if this is about money, I've got 1300... no... 1100... I've got $75 in my savings account! It's yours.
Okay, Val - now, the way Gary sees it, you got three choices: you can find yourself another job and pray it's going to be a better situation, do what Holly said and start your own company, or do what 99% of the world does and stay where you are and suck it up.
PPeter
Here, call the wife and tell her that Mike has arranged for you to take her out on the town, anywhere she wants to go, anything she wants do. If it's furry, get it. If it's sparkly, get it. I want this credit card company to call me up scared.
So you're talking some hot girl on girl shopping.
You know the worst thing a guy can be in his life is a chump. And when I said that, I totally set myself up to be a chump.
You're not a chump.
Not yet, but it runs strong in my family. My dad was a chump, his dad was a chump, my cousin's a chuuuump. Somebody's got to step up and break the cycle.
You need me to chill out, don't you?
So so much.
Well, I promise you, I will I will chill out. Because, I don't want to lose you. And the dentist gave me these. (Holds out some prescription pills)
Val, you were awesome, I'm so proud of you. I'll be back in two seconds, I'm gonna hit up the supply closet and steal everything that's not nailed down.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's What I Like About You pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.