Cat quotes from Victorious

Cat

(gasps) Hey!

Jade

What?

Cat

I haven't said anything for a while.

Andre

Cat, no!

Tori

What are you doing?

Cat

I wanted to lick the laser beam with my tongue.

Tori

Why?

Cat

(sighs) Well...

Tori

You wanna know what flavor it is, don't you?

Jade

[explosively] Somebody just get me A SANDWICH!

Cat

Kay-kay. [runs through the laser-beams and the alarm goes off]

No, Cat!

Cat

[screams] I'm sorry!

Andre

C'mon, Rob, let's go back inside.

Robbie

No.

Cat

Robbie, come on.

Jade

Yeah, we'll get you some ice for your, uh...injuries.

Robbie

No! Just leave me here on the dirty ground where I belong.

Jade

(shrugs) K. (walks off)

Cat

This Hambone battle is really scary.

Jade

We're about to watch two nerds compete by slapping themselves, I think we'll be okay.

Cat

You didn't sound anything like me!

Jade

Tori believed it was you.

Cat

You didn't get my laugh right.

Jade

Yeah, I did. You go (imitates Cat's laugh) hahahahaha!

Cat

I don't laugh like that.

Jade

(pause) Puppies wearing sunglasses.

Cat

(laughs, then realizes she sounds just like Jade's imitation) Dang it.

Jade

(on the phone to Tori, as Cat) Hi, Tori! Um, my brother locked me in the closet and I'm really bored and I just wanted to know what you guys were doing. (laughs)

Cat

(to herself) That's so disrespectful.

Jade

Well?

Cat

Thank you for the ice cream cone.

Jade

I bought you the ice cream so you'd tell me where Tori and Beck are.

Cat

I don't know where they are!

Cat

I feel like you did that on purpose.

Jade

God, I hate being stuck in traffic! We're gonna be late, and we're gonna miss Beck and Tori. ugh (blows horn)

Cat

HONK!!! (giggles) I honked. Just like your car. Oh, let's think about all the different kinds of honks there are. I like the one that's like "meep-meep." You know, like the bird does it in the cartoons.

Jade

The Roadrunner?

Cat

No, I don't like him. He's so mean to that dog.

Jade

That "dog" is a coyote.

Cat

Oh, my god! Was that racist???

Jade

How do you know so much about animal hospitals cat?

Cat

My brother has a turtle with "special problems.

Tori

You have no right to be mad at us because you and Beck broke up and we like each other, ok?!

Jade

I'm not.

Tori

[surprised] You're what?

Jade

I'm not mad.

Cat

Careful, it's a trick!

Jade

It's not a trick. I...I thought I was mad, but now that I'm here, what do I have to be mad about? We broke up, we're all friends, (gestures to Tori) kind of. I mean, any of us should be able to hang out with whoever we want.

Cat

Still thinkin' it's a trick.

Cat

Don't you just love how dogs hang their heads out the window and lick the wind? Watch. (She hangs her head out the window, pants and barks)

Jade

Pull your head back in the car before I roll up the window and cut it off!

Cat

(pulls her head back in, frightened) My head's back in the car.

Jade

Now call Tori and find out where Beck's taking her.

Cat

(to herself) Bossy.

Jade

What?

Cat

Calling Tori!

Cat

Hi!

Tori

Oh, hi, Cat.

Cat

Hi! (pause) Oh, wait, I already said that.

Tori

It's alright.

Cat

So, you guys are all gonna go see the big bone tomorrow night?

Tori

No, Andre and Robbie decided they're gonna make a video to try to win the new Pear Pad 3.

Cat

Oh, I hear it has a new screen. Slightly better.

Tori

It's very exciting.

Cat

So you don't have any plans tomorrow night?

Tori

No, I do. Beck and I are gonna...

Cat

Oooooh...

Tori

Stop, it's not like a date.

Cat

Oh, right. (winks)

Tori

Stop doing that with your eye! We're just hanging out. You know, friends...ish.

Cat

Oh, so I can tell people you're going out with Beck?

Tori

We're not going out.

Cat

So you're staying in with him?

Tori

No!

Cat

I see you, girl.

Tori

Just don't tell anyone!

Cat

Ok. I'll keep your dirty secret. (winks repeatedly)

Cat

Hi, Jade!

Jade

Hey.

Cat

Do you wanna do something fun with me tomorrow night?

Jade

Sure, what?

Cat

I don't know. I figured you'd pick cause you're bossy.

Jade

Don't say I'm bossy!

Cat

Ok! (pause) But you are. (Jade glares) A little bit.

Jade

Whatever. Yeah, let's hang out tomorrow night.

Cat

Ok. But we can't ask Tori to go with us because she's -- (gasps in shock upon realizing she let it out)

Jade

What's Tori doing tomorrow night?

Cat

Nothing! I don't know. (pause) She told me not to tell you.

Jade

5!

Cat

Oh, god.

Jade

4!

Cat

Don't count!

Jade

3!

Cat

Oh, I love 3!

Jade

2!

Cat

Have you heard about the new Pear Pads with the slightly better screen?

Jade

1!

Cat

Ok, ok! (pause) Tori and Beck are going out together.

Jade

What?

Cat

But it's not a date, they're just hanging out as friends!

Jade

Ok. Well, I know what you and I are doing tomorrow night.

Cat

Going to see the big bone?

Jade

No. We're gonna find out where Beck and Tori are going and see whether they're just friends.

Cat

I thought you said I could pick what we do.

Jade

No, I'm picking. (walks away)

Cat

(to herself) Bossy.

Jade

What?

Cat

Nothing.

Jade

Where is he?

Cat

Hi.

Tori

I don't remember saying "come in".

Jade

I don't remember saying you could hog Moose.

Tori

What are you talking about?

Jade

(imitating Tori) Oh, Moose my goodness, I certainly do enjoy a fine game of hockey.

Cat

(imitating Tori) Oh, please take me to the hockey game, Moose. I'm ever so desperate!

Tori

I don't talk like that!

Jade

Whatever. You have been hogging Moose and you know it.

Cat

Moose hogger.

Tori

How can I hog a guy if he's not even here?!

Jade

Then where is he?

Tori

He said he wanted to hang out with Beck.

Cat

Hmmm.

Jade

I bet they're at Karaoke Dokie right now.

Cat

Cause that's where the hamburgers are.

Jade

Later.

Cat

Gator.