Mr. Nezzer quotes from VeggieTales

Mr. Nezzer

[after looking at the clock] Yep, I'm just going to stay awake. I'm not tired at all. I'm just going to stay wiiidddee....[snores]

Grandpa George

Heh! The Nezzer Chocolate Bunny! Every day, they make 14,638 of these li'l fellers, give or take a few. Oh yeah, Mr. Nezzer! Nebby K. Nezzer. But you better call him Mr. Nezzer. Now, Mr. Nezzer's not a bad man, he just gets confused sometimes. Why, his chocolate bunnies are sellin' so well, I think he's gotten a little big for his britches. And that's saying something, so his britches'll break out to start out with. What's all that have to do with Rack, Shack & Benny? Well, their troubles started when Mr. Nezzer made a little announcement.

Mr. Nezzer

Attention, little people! I have an announcement! This morning, the Nezzer Chocolate Factory has shipped its two-millionth chocolate bunny! To celebrate this momentous occasion, for the next 30 minutes, everyone may eat as many bunnies they want! Bon appétit!

Mr. Lunt

[operating the TV camera] Hey, boss, that's awfully nice of you to give away all those bunnies.

Mr. Nezzer

Oh, if I could just see the looks on their faces right now. [takes a rest]

Mr. Nezzer

Everybody else is lying down, but you three are standing up.

Mr. Lunt

Actually, boss, I think the tomato is sitting.

I'm standing.

Mr. Lunt

Sitting!

Look, [squats] this is sitting... [stretches up] and this is standing. I'm standing.

Mr. Lunt

Okay, he's standing.

Mr. Nezzer

What're your names, boys?

I'm Shadrach.

I'm Abumblebee... Abennyboo... I'm Benny.

Mr. Nezzer

Well? What do you think?

Um... what would happen, let's say, if someone didn't quite agree with everything in that song, so they, um... didn't sing it? What would happen?

Mr. Nezzer

What's that over there?

That's the furnace.

Mr. Nezzer

What's it for?

Well, that's where the bad bunnies go.

Mr. Nezzer

And let's just say, in my mind, if you don't bow down and sing the song, you're a BAD bunny.

[unnerved] You don't mean...?

Mr. Nezzer

But I'm sure that won't happen. It's almost time for the ceremony. I'll see you out there.

Mr. Lunt

[notices that Rack, Shack and Benny aren't bowing] Hey, boss? Those three guys, they don't look like they're bowing.

Mr. Nezzer

[confused] Hmm... aren't those our new Junior Executives?

Mr. Lunt

I think so. Maybe they're stuck.

Mr. Nezzer

Let's find out. [moves the podium over to Rack, Shack and Benny] I said, it's time to sing "The Bunny Song."

Come on, guys, sing the song! Everybody's doing it.

Mr. Nezzer

[with increasing frustration] Sing the song!

Mr. Lunt

They ain't singing, boss.

Mr. Nezzer

[finally on the brink of losing his temper] SING!

Mr. Nezzer

Is that "The Bunny Song?"

Mr. Lunt

[skeptical] No, I don't think so.

[worried] Are you crazy? That's the wrong song!

Mr. Nezzer

[touched] Oh, that was wonderful. I'm gonna be singing that song myself... [suddenly angry] as I throw you into the furnace! GUARDS! [Rack, Shack and Benny are shocked] Seize them! Take them to the furnace.

I've gotta help them. But how?

Grandpa George

[off-camera] Rack, Shack and Benny will be right back, after this short break.

Sorry, sir! Can't let you cook my buddies!

Mr. Nezzer

GUARDS! Get them!

Hang on, guys!

I said, NOBODY bakes my buddies!

Mr. Nezzer

[as a pin holding the door shut starts to bend under their weight] Listen here, young lady, if you don't plug that back in, you're gonna be in BIIIIIIG trouble!

Mr. Nezzer

[laughs evilly] Nobody's ever gonna stand up to me again! [lights turns off] Hmm?

Mr. Lunt

Hey boss, how many guys did we throw in the furnace?

Mr. Nezzer

Uh, three?

Mr. Lunt

Well, it looks like four guys in there now and one of them's REAL SHINY! One more thing, boss. They ain't burnin' up.

Mr. Nezzer

Rack! Shack! Benny, come out of there!

Mr. Nezzer

God has saved you from the fiery furnace. Oh I was wrong to try and make you do things you weren't supposed to do. What was I thinking? I must have forgot everything my mommy taught me. Can you ever forgive me?

We forgive you.

Mr. Nezzer

Oh, thanks. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?

Well, you could sing one of our songs.

Mr. Nezzer

How's it go?

You know. I was hoping you'd ask.

[dressed as Santa Claus] Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas! Hey kids, do you have the "don't know what I want for Christmas" blues? If I know my toys, and you know I do, than I know just what you're looking for. You want a toy that's fun. You want a toy that's cute. Most importantly, you want a toy with a fully-functioning buzzsaw in his right hand. That's right, you want Buzz-Saw Louie!

Mr. Nezzer

Cool, huh? But wait, there's more! Buzz-Saw Louie also knows the true meaning of Christmas. All you have to do is push his nose and... [presses the Louie's nose]

Christmas is when you get stuff! You need more toys!

Mr. Nezzer

Getting your own doll is easy. Just have your parents place an order, and one of our trained penguins will deliver it right to your door.

Delivery not available to Pugslyville due to the collapse of the Pugslyville Bridge.

Mr. Nezzer

So take it from me, Mr. Nezzer... I mean, Santa Claus and his little elf helper.

Mr Lunt

[wearing pointed ears and hat] Look at me, I'm an elf!

Mr. Nezzer

You just won't be happy until you have Buzz-Saw Louie, the only toy with a working buzzsaw and the true meaning of Christmas.

Billy has more toys than you.

Mr. Nezzer

One more thing. If those parents really care about the true meaning of Christmas, where are they now?

We're right here!

Mr. Nezzer

Huh? [turns to see the Veggie parents and their kids glaring back]

We care much about the true meaning of Christmas, Mr. Nezzer!

That's what we came here... to give you what you deserve!

Mr. Nezzer

Wha-wha-oh! You didn't really think I was going to... heh... oh, that was just... just a joke! I wouldn't... What are you going to do?

Mr. Nezzer... Merry Christmas!

Mr. Nezzer

Huh? Is that for me? Oh, it's a little bear! Oh, I always wanted a Christmas present, but we were too poor! You don't know how happy this makes me! Look! Isn't it cute!

What a nice man! (The Mother Weed looks at Alfred, and when nice words are spread, Alfred smiles and they both look down at everyone. Suddenly the ground starts to shake from under the mother weed as everyone backs away from the weed. Due to all the kind things said by all the city folk, more flowers sprout all over the weed until her head becomes a flower, defeating her for good.)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! (Alfred is shown sliding down the stem and lands safely)

We're sorry for thinking that you were a robot.

Mr. Nezzer

We didn't even ask you if it was true!

Oh, I forgive you... I forgive you all! [looks around] Has anybody seen LarryBoy?

Hey, Alfred... everyone... someone was telling me that you were a robot- [Everybody shushes him loudly] Is there a flower show?

Mr. Nezzer

Its a bug! A big bug!

Do I look like a bug to you?

[suddenly runs in the church, almost out of breath] Somebody! Anybody! The factory! The chickens! IT'S ALL GONNA BLOW!

Mr. Nezzer

What?

We tried to turn off the chickens, but they're too hot. I got out okay, but Cavis is inside! He's trapped!

Someone, call the police!

Call the fire department!

Mr. Nezzer

Here we go! 10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2... Hit it!

AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!

Mr. Nezzer

Whew! We made it!