Mr. Moseby quotes from The Suite Life on Deck

[Holding up a carved pumpkin] I brought you her head.

London

[Stares at the pumpkin for a while] Yep! That's her!

[rips a mask from his imposter, sees he's a robot, and screams]

Bailey

[gasps] Mr. Moseby is a robot!

London

That would explain why he never wanted the company of a woman.

[walks to everyone in a scuba diver suit] Mr. Moseby, I think I got to the bottom of things.

And?

It seems something clogged an air duct causing an internal rupture which cracked the window.

Bailey

Was it my corn snips?

Cody

Was it my sujihiki?

Woody

Was it my powerful bowels?

[to Bailey] No. [to Cody] No. [to Woody] Ew. It was this pocket hanky! Apparently you dropped your hanky into the vent when you got scared by that dolphin and wet your pants. [she leaves]

[smiles nervously] Oops. [his cellphone rings] Ah! It's Mr. Tipton! He's gonna wanna know who to throw off the ship. I don't want to leave!

Bailey

We can't let Mr. Tipton fire Mr. Moseby.

London

Oh give me the phone! [takes the phone and talks to her dad] Daddy, I flooded the Aqua Lounge. It was all my fault. Yep, it's Switzerland all over again. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yay! Bye daddy! [hangs up]

Marcus

Well, did he kick you off?

London

Nah. He just cut my allowance to 50,000 a week.

Cody

Looks like no one is leaving the ship after all.

Marcus

[looks at his cellphone] I'm leaving the ship!

What?!

Zack

But it's Moseby's fault.

Marcus

I know, but I just got an email from those producers about my hip hopera, they said it was the most ridiculous thing they have ever seen!

Bailey

Then why are you so happy?

Marcus

They said it's going to be the next big comedy. They're moving my whole family to New York; I'm going to star in a Broadway show! I'm going to be the lead tooth.

Zack

Comedy? I thought you said it was a serious love story about overcoming adversity.

Marcus

Look, it's a stupid song about a girl with bad teeth.

[singing] Retainer baby, retainer baby, I require that wire.

[still singing when everybody stops] Retainer baby! [makes weird noises then stops] Guess it's cake time.

Marcus

Well Mr. Moseby thanks again for everything. Before I leave I want to give you something.

Please Marcus you don't need to do that. Your friendship is gift enough.

Marcus

Well it's a Little Little t-shirt made into a pocket hanky.

THIS IS THE BEST GIFT EVER! [hugs Marcus and leaves]

Bailey

Aww! This reminds me of my goodbye party when I left Kettlecorn except you're leaving and I'm not. And we're on a boat not on a barn. And there's not a giant twister barring down on us. [hugs Marcus] Oh Marcus, congratulations!

Marcus

Thanks! [Bailey leaves]

Marcus

[to Woody] Well Woody, I'm going to miss you.

Woody

Marcus, I always thought of you as a brother. A real brother. Not like this kid named Neil who's forty years old and lives in my treehouse.

Marcus

Well I got nothing to say for that so let's just cut right to the man hug. [hugs Woody]

Woody

We're gonna miss you Marcus.

Cody

Just want to say good luck big guy. To think you'll be entertaining people while promoting proper dental care? I am so proud of you. [hugs Marcus]

Marcus

I'm going to miss you Cody.

Cody

I'm going to miss you too.

Marcus

[to Zack] Zack, I think I'm going to miss you most of all.

Woody

Hurtful.

Zack

I'm going to miss you too buddy. You know you're the only roommate I've ever had that I didn't hate.

Cody

Hurtful.

Zack

[hugs Marcus]

Marcus

Well you guys, I just want to say thank you for everything. Before I came here I was going through a really, really tough time but you guys took me in. You made me feel like family and I will always be grateful to you so thank you. And if you guys are ever in New York, please just look me up.

Zack

You know what? We just might do that someday.

London

Someday? How about now? Take me with you!

Marcus

Okay! [picks up London and starts to leave]

London

Next stop Tiffany's! Whoo!

Our next victi- uh, challenger is - [gets picked up by giant sumo wrestler; screaming] Aaahh! NO! NO NO NO, NOT ME! I'M THE HOST!

[Puts Mr. Moseby down] Oh, sorry lady.

Young London

(sad) Daddy's not coming home for Christmas?

You know what? Let's head down to that shelter and help the less fortunate. That always bucks up your spirits.

Young London

My spirits are fine. I just want to stay here and play with my toys. (starts backing up with her car)