Bailey quotes from The Suite Life on Deck

Bailey

I think I have a crush on the teacher.

Bailey

I'm pretty sure we lost some viewers when you and your mascara started running.

Bailey

Woody! Your B.O caused a K.O! [Woody approaches her about to hug; avoiding his underarms] No no!

Bailey

[To Cody] How could you hate me so much?

Bailey

[A couple minutes later] Cody, I'm so glad you want to have six kids.

Bailey, I'd let you stay; but unfortunately we don't have a cabin to put you in.

Zack

She can stay in my room. I'm willing to take one for the team.

I meant, a girl's cabin. Every girl has a roommate.

London

Except for me!

Bailey

Oh, London. Thank you. Thank you.

London, so nice of you to offer to share your room with Bailey.

London

I wasn't offering! I was gloating!

Bailey

I want to stay here and be your BFF! (hugs London)

London

Get O-F-F.

Bailey

Look! Where did that little piggy come from?

Woody

That's what the doctor said when he saw my extra toe.

Bailey

[to the pig] Are you stuck? Here, I have something for you. You like nuts? [picking up a rope lying on the ground] Oh, this rope will work like a leash. There. Aw, he's so sweet. He reminds me of my–

Zack

Breakfast?

Cody

Football?

Bailey

Y'all hush up! He reminds me of my pet pig from back on the farm. Sir Snorts-a-Lot and I were best friends. Then one day I woke up and he wasn't there any more. I got really worried. But Mama told me he moved to the big city.

Has anyone ever heard of the International Dateline?

Woody

What you say to a French babe so she'll go out with you?

Bailey

No. It's an imaginary line created in 1884, to the east of which the date is a day earlier than it is to the west.

Cody

So when you cross the dateline you have to turn your clocks back 24 hours, a full day.

Correct. [claps] Yay! Which is what we are going to do tonight.

Zack

That works for me. Because if tomorrow is going to be today again, then today is actually yesterday, which means that yesterday's homework isn't due today, it's really due... tomorrow!

In other words, you didn't do your homework?

Zack

Yet.

London, can you tell me what this is?

London

A bad manicure.

No. Though, ew. Okay. Has anyone heard of the International Dateline?

Cody

Wait a second. What's going on here? We already learned about the International Dateline.

I'm sorry if you read ahead, Cody, but I have to teach to the lowest common denominator.

Zack

Whoa, whoa, we're doing Math now? I thought this was Geography.

Cody

No. I mean, what happened to the dance?

Bailey

You mean, the one we're having tonight?

Cody

I'm having the strangest sense of déjà vu.

London

Déjà who?

Cody

Déjà vu. It's French for "I've seen this all before."

Zack

Wait a second. This is French? I thought this was Math.

Woody

Ick Ick Ick! Can't go in there. [Blocks door]

Bailey

Why not? This is my cabin.

Woody

Not at the moment. Right now it's a production studio. Show business.

Bailey

What?

Woody

London's doing a webisode of Yay Me! Star-ring Lon-don Tip-ton! So you can't go in.

Bailey

But I have to get in there to do To-mor-row's Home-work! By Bail-ey Pick-ett!

London

Unpack what? She can't afford any luggage.

Bailey

Why don't you guys just flip a coin?

London

Who has a coin?

Maddie

(holding a coin) I do.

Wonderful. Thank you Maddie.

Maddie! (they all greet Maddie)

Maddie

London, so good to see you. And Mr. Moseby, rockin' the knee socks.

And I have a crest.

Maddie

I see. And Cody, no sweater vest?

Cody

Oh Maddie, that was the old Cody. You're looking at the new cool Cody. (hugs Maddie)

Maddie

Ow.

Cody

Oh sorry. That was my astronaut pen.

Maddie

And you must be Bailey, London's roommate. Did she give you any space for your clothes?

Bailey

I just got upgraded from a nail to a hook.

Maddie

Nice.

Zack

Hey sweet thing. How about some sugar?

Maddie

Come here.

Zack

(about to hug her but goes to the pool and throws up in there then comes back to hug Maddie)

Maddie

I think I'll pass.

London

Told you she's poor! She sleeps on a raft!

Bailey

London, they make very comfortable inflatable mattresses these days.

Maddie

They do... But this happens to be a raft.

Maddie

I can't believe I'm being forced to marriage at gunpoint!

Bailey

More like cannon point!

London

Hey, I have the same sunglasses!

Bailey

These are your sunglasses. [takes off her red wig and sunglasses] It's me, Bailey.