Woody quotes from The Suite Life on Deck

Woody

But she's smart and you're smart. That's stupid.

Woody

Either I need a softer coconut or a harder straw.

Woody

How much preparation do we need? We play invisible instruments. We're basically mimes without make-up!

Woody

Locked and loaded!

Woody

Do not touch me, peasant! I am Lord Pembleton.

Woody

That's us. The Three Muskateers!

Woody

[Seeing that they will be playing basketball against Dwight Howard] We're in trouble.

Woody

Hurtful, sir!

Woody

We're going to need a bigger net.

Bailey

Look! Where did that little piggy come from?

Woody

That's what the doctor said when he saw my extra toe.

Bailey

[to the pig] Are you stuck? Here, I have something for you. You like nuts? [picking up a rope lying on the ground] Oh, this rope will work like a leash. There. Aw, he's so sweet. He reminds me of my–

Zack

Breakfast?

Cody

Football?

Bailey

Y'all hush up! He reminds me of my pet pig from back on the farm. Sir Snorts-a-Lot and I were best friends. Then one day I woke up and he wasn't there any more. I got really worried. But Mama told me he moved to the big city.

Has anyone ever heard of the International Dateline?

Woody

What you say to a French babe so she'll go out with you?

Bailey

No. It's an imaginary line created in 1884, to the east of which the date is a day earlier than it is to the west.

Cody

So when you cross the dateline you have to turn your clocks back 24 hours, a full day.

Correct. [claps] Yay! Which is what we are going to do tonight.

Zack

That works for me. Because if tomorrow is going to be today again, then today is actually yesterday, which means that yesterday's homework isn't due today, it's really due... tomorrow!

In other words, you didn't do your homework?

Zack

Yet.

Woody

Ick Ick Ick! Can't go in there. [Blocks door]

Bailey

Why not? This is my cabin.

Woody

Not at the moment. Right now it's a production studio. Show business.

Bailey

What?

Woody

London's doing a webisode of Yay Me! Star-ring Lon-don Tip-ton! So you can't go in.

Bailey

But I have to get in there to do To-mor-row's Home-work! By Bail-ey Pick-ett!

She's interested in Woody now!

Bailey

Woody! I wouldn't go out with Woody if he was the last guy on earth!

Woody

Hey!

Bailey

Woody, I'm sorry. I didn't mean... [girl smacks her with spatula]

Woody

No Problem! (Uses the beak in his woodpecker costume to change the channel)

Zack

With your hands Bird Brain!

Woody

I'm so scared.

Cody

Keep the camera on me.

Bailey

Cody, are you okay?

Zack

What's happening?

Cody

Severed arm!

Requesting {cough} backup.

No!!!!

Little Kirby. Stay with me. Tiny officer down! Tiny officer down!