I can't believe this!
Why not? Last year, you believed a flyin' saucer was over East Rutherford.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
You wanna train him to be a professional killer?
Oh will you stop! They're soldiers. And the United States Army hardly ever goes to war anymore.
They were marching with rifles, Tony.
The barrels are plugged! They're symbolic!
Symbolic of what?
Respect!
He will be subjected to the discipline of kids hardly older than himself. Does that seem smart? Boys his age still kill frogs and small animals.
The Cusamano's Binky? The cherry bomb with the nails in it, you think it was AJ?
No, that is what I'm trying to tell you. He is still a child. He's a normal child. He's made some mistakes. God knows, he's got a shitload to learn about life. That does not mean that I'm gonna let you send him to the type of school whose whole reason for being is to make him follow orders by instilling fear.
He thinks the world owes him a fuckin' livin'.
What could've given him that bizarre idea?
We tried it your way for fifteen years now, with Berry Brazel to validatin' his feelings and that fuckin' school did the same thing and what a surprise. He thinks the world runs on his feelings! Well, he's gonna go learn to be a man.
I will not send him to that place.
World really went downhill after the World Trade Center. You know, Quasimodo predicted all of this.
Who did what?
All these problems, the middle east. The end o' the world.
Nostradamus. Quasimodo's the hunchback of Notre Dame.
Oh, right. Notredamus.
Nostradamus and Notre Dame, that's two different things completely.
It's interesting though they'd be so similar, isn't it? And I always thought, "OK, Hunchback of Notre Dame. You also got your quarterback and your halfback of Notre Dame".
One's a fucking cathedral!
Obviously, I know. I'm just sayin'. It's interesting, the coincidence. What, you're gonna tell me you never pondered that? The back thing with Notre Dame?
No!
MLMurf Lupo
We had a little scare. Thought it was a shunt in his heart, he passed some gas. He seems better. (about Uncle Junior)
Why don't you go on Joe Franklin, tell the whole tri-state area.
There is no reason you shouldn't be able to pass Social Studies.
You passin' Social Studies?
You just revealed your own ignorance...it's only been five days, we didn't get grades yet.
I what? I reveal my own what? (Tony smacks AJ in the back of the head)
(about Tony) Fuckin' asshole. Ever since I questioned his judgment on some Ralphie-Jackie Jr. problem. Like he's fuckin' infallible. Pope Tony the twenty third or some shit.
And I provide for my children.
Yes, Tony. You do. But I don't know how you do it, because you won't tell me. Well, let me tell you something, or you can watch the fucking news...everything comes to an end.
I hear Ginny Sack's getting a ninety five pound mole taken off her ass.
So I was thinkin' right...what we do is start our own group. I'll be the singer and you two can back me up.
DDanielle
Yeah right...ha ha ha...
Puh-lease!!
What?!! It's so hard to rap? Mah bitch. Mah Ho. Mah Ho. Mah bitch. Mah bitch bitch. What? A joke? You don't wanna back me up?
The therapist told her it is her "right" to go to Europe.
Whoa, whoa, she actually thinks this a good ide- [sits on a bowl of cereal, tosses it onto Meadow's desk] She actually thinks this is a good idea?
She says it's no big deal, I can pick up my education wherever, whenever.
: Oh, really?
Meadow Soprano Wendy said she can get me into a school in Barcelona if I decided to stay.
Who's "Wendy"?
Dr. Wendy Klober.
Barcelona...
I could take Melfi's head and crush it like a fuckin' walnut.
I feel battered!
[getting out of bed] I've gotta get to the salon.
Did you tell "Wendy" you didn't work all summer?
Meadow Soprano[sarcastically] Wait, you're right, I forgot to mention the "pivotal role" of the work ethic in this family!
You can lose that smart mouth right now.
Or what? What is this, Afghanistan? I'm over eighteen now, I'm a grown woman, I can go wherever I want and do what I want.
Alright! Jesus, God, we know that! Is that your only point here? Because "just" getting what you want is for babies, not adults.
It may interest you to know she thinks I probably should be on Prozac.
She does?
She said that?
Jackie was murdered! I know you think it's nothing screaming my head off at the Columbia-Army game wouldn't cure.
That is so unfair.
Alright, look, I've been thinking about this: now you're a smart girl, the right move is for you to wait. Just until next year maybe?
You know what I don't understand, Dad? You were all in favor of me going.
Your mother doesn't want it.
Meadow Soprano [sarcastically] Wow, listen to "Mr. Mob Boss"!
What did you call me?
Meadow Soprano All this fucking pussyfooting around, years now? Why don't we just get it out all there?
[Tony is furious, and marches up to Meadow's face]
Tony...
Shut up.
Tony!
[to Meadow] You got something you wanna say to me?
What do you mean?
What do I mean? What do you mean? All these innuendoes. You inferring to me that I didn't do everything I could to keep that kid from fucking himself up? That yeah, knowing him and his family... that I didn't try to be a better dad to him than his own dad, God rest his soul? That I didn't try to protect Jackie Junior? That I didn't actually smack him around, 'cause I was so frustrated? Is that what you're trying to tell me?
[breaking down in tears] I'm through telling people you help with environmental cleanup!
That's not what I asked you.
Like you could talk honestly for three fucking seconds!
You try me!
[...]
I've made my plans, I'm going to Europe, and I'm getting the fuck out of here! [runs out of her room]
So how's yer love life?
Why don't you mind your goddamn business?
I don't know, it kinda feels like it is my business considerin' I had to haul your last boyfriend outta your kitchen in a hefty bag.
You're a miserable fuck. You know that? You're just like Ma.
Oh yeah?
Yeah really, with your condescension and your sabotage. For your information, Ralph is a great guy.
Trust me, I got more information than I need about Ralphie.
Well it's always something, Tony. What are you, threatened by the fact that he has a sense of style?
Oh a sense of style?
Ralph Lauren? Collegiate?
Let me ask you a question Janice, do I know this guy better than you? Cause I'm tellin' you, he's no fuckin' good.
My happiness really drives you crazy, doesn't it, Tony?
Ralph told this funny fuckin' joke though at umm..at Albert's party. He goes, "Ginny Sack had a ninety five pound mole surgically taken off her ass."
He said that?
Yeah...
And you think its funny?
Uh...it's some bad taste...huh?
And don't think I forgot about you goin' through my fuckin' fiance's underwear drawer.
That wasn't me you fucking jerk!
NANative American Protestor
Mussolini was Hitler's bitch!!!
You need a lot right now, and I don't think there's anything I can do.
RARosalie Aprile
You can be there for me. You can comfort me.
What about me? What do I get out of it?
RARosalie Aprile
There it is. Right there. What do you get! How 'bout yer every need taken care of sexually, everything. All yer shit! It's all about you, isn't it?!!!
It's not all about me, but I mean...let's be realistic.
RARosalie Aprile
Let's be realistic?! What, you wanna leave me?
(pause) yeah...
RARosalie Aprile
Then get the fuck out!!!
It doesn't have to be like this.
RARosalie Aprile
How should it be, huh? How the fuck should it be?! (Ralph leaves)
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Sopranos pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.