Patrick Jane quotes from The Mentalist

Jane

[observing Cho] Kid's a natural. Look at him. The Cho. No business like Cho business.

Jane

But first, could someone please make me a cup of tea?

Jane

Is that a yes? [Sniffs a few times] Rigsby.

Jane

Yeah, you guys go find out. I'll find the couch. [Stands up and turns around] Oh, there it is.

Jane

It's lovely to meet you, doc. You're a horse's ass, but you mean well.

Jane

This is beautiful. [places the crown on Lisbon's head]

Jane

Really?

Jane

Hogwash. (meaning nonsense.)

Patrick Jane

Ladies and gentlemen, quick announcement: I'd like you to give a very warm welcome to Walter's new girlfriend, number one - Teresa Lisbon.

Jane

Memory is unreliable because the untrained brain has a crappy filing system. It takes everything that happens to you and throws it all whilly-nilly into a big, dark closet. When you go in there looking for something all you can find are the big obvious things, like when your mom died or stuff you don't really need. Stuff that you're not looking for, like the words to Copacabana. You can't find what you need, but don't panic because it is still there.

Jane

We both cheated death! That's remarkable. We should get T-shirts made up!

Jane

My parting gift I will give to you tomorrow morning. Good night.

Jane

[from bed] There's room up here.

Jane

Good luck Teresa, I love you.

Jane

Have you ever seen your mother naked?

Jane

Could you pass the cheese plate? This is getting good.

Jane

Discipline always comes with a price.