Teresa Lisbon quotes from The Mentalist

Lisbon

[on the phone with Jane] Hey. So, you might be right about this case. Might be. Thanks for the insight...no, did I say that? I'm acknowledging the fact that you might be right, that's all. I mean, if you wanted to come back, I couldn't stop you...yeah, fine, I'm asking you to come back...because...because you're useful to the team...no. No, I won't say "please". Go screw yourself. [Lisbon hangs up] Jackass.

Lisbon

[To the local Sheriff] We don't help, we take over.

Lisbon

[To Patrick] Your people are carnie folk, it's finally making sense to me.

Lisbon

That's funny. "Don't listen to control freaks." "Whatever you say, sir."

Lisbon

[to Jane] Just do me the favor of listening to me for a minute, so I can say "I told you so" later.

Lisbon

[to Tamzin] Unfortunately it seems that one of your friends helped your magic along with a blunt instrument. In which case, you're as unmagically guilty as they are.

Lisbon

[To Grace on the phone] Things are getting weird, we're off to see a witch.

Lisbon

A brawl? you started a brawl? Come on!

Lisbon

[After Jane let Walter's car fall off a cliff. Lisbon gets a phone call] Hey Cho... Oh no... Oh great. No. No, you can handle this one. Just be clear that the CBI is not liable. He is just a consultant.

Lisbon

We really need to get you a bell.

Lisbon

If there's a group hug coming, I am so outta here.

Lisbon

I'm sorry.

Lisbon

It's like a bad date. I wish these bozos would just vanish.

Lisbon

Give him some lipstick and some blush.

Lisbon

Jane... I need your help.