Will Smith quotes from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

Carlton

Why don't you act like an adult?

Will

Why don't you look like one?

Philip

Oh, my God.

What is it? A boy or a girl?

Philip

This isn't a sonogram. It's a bill for $25,000. This baby's costing me a fortune.

Will

Congratulations, you're having a Hilary!

Will

Hold up, Hold up, Time-out Time-out, flag on the play, traveling, offsides, clipping. What up with this here?

Carlton

Hillary, how'd you know that?

Easy, Geoffrey's been watching that Brain Storm tape all day.

Will

This is my little brother, Carlton! He knows we can't afford new clothes so he just doesn't grow!

Carlton

(To Geoffrey) Daddy! I wanna grow!

Geoffrey

(To people in restaurant) These aren't my children!

Will

Is it our fault you never married Mom? I know she embarrassed you! She only had one arm! And whenever you two would go to concerts, she'd clap like this (slaps left hand on neck)

Ashley

What happened in here?

Will

We was robbed!

Hilary

Oh, my God! What did they take?!

Will

Tell me there's a baseball in this case.

Carlton

It's empty.

Will

I guess you weren't listening!

Philip

What baseball?

Will

(in Hispanic accent) What baseball? Well, baseball sport where man with stick hit ball and run. Sorta like this. (he tries to escape the empty living room, but Philip catches him by the shirt)

Will

You know, I used to think the only reason to kill a man was self-defense, but I just spent 45 minutes in the Volvo with another reason.

Hilary

What's wrong with him?

Will

This idiot is taking a mime class.

Will

Carlton, get... I swear to God, Carlton, get away from me with this. Stop. Stop playing. Carlton, stop or I'll hang you with that rope!

Will

All right, that's it. That's it.

Will

I was going to throw him out on the freeway... but you know the old saying: A mime is a terrible thing to waste.

Will

Carlton, say something to the baby.

Carlton

Never let Will borrow money... even if he begs and he will.

Will

(talking into recorder} That's your brother, Carlton. You'll recognize him. He'll be the one at eye level.

Phillip

I'm eating.

Will

(talking into recorder) You'll hear that a lot.

Phillip

You're grounded.

Will

(talking into recorder) Well, that about sums up Uncle Phil.

Philip

My dining club is what made me what I am today.

Will

Nah. Too easy.

Carlton

Will, wake up.

Will

Yo, man. Go away.

Carlton

Will, this is the Senior prom. Also known as "Guaranteed Action Night".

Will

Rack 'em up!

Will

Man, we're eating.

Carlton

I have a big zit.

Philip

Carlton, we're eating.

[all scream] STOP WITH THE DAMN BELL!!!!!