Pvt. Dancer quotes from Scrubs

Even though no one ever comes, every time I hit this nurse's button, I feel a bit better.

Dr. Kelso

That's morphine.

That explains it.

Dr. Kelso

Let's just say that around here, I'm not as loved as your Sargent Borden.

We hated Sgt. Borden.

Dr. Kelso

Come again?

Yeah, he demeaned us, overworked us... Still, maybe sometimes that's what being a good leader is. Uniting everyone by giving 'em someone to hate.

[about his physical therapist] Why don't you just ask her out?

J.D.

Expertly flirting is one thing, but I just got out of a serious relationship. Plus, I'm a tent-dwelling poop-fainter who can't drive.

I have a fiberglass skull.

J.D.

It's always gotta be a competition with you, doesn't it?