Cat Valentine quotes from Sam & Cat

Cat

What if I fall in the toilet and get stuck again?

Cat

  [pulls Sam out from inside the sofa bed]  That's not how you sleep on a sofa bed.

Cat

  Oh, please!  You saved me from being squished in garbage!  Let me repay you with the gift of bathing!

Cat

  [loudly into a megaphone]  I'm stopping my vehicle!

Cat

  Where's my Nona?!

Cat

  Bye!  [gum falls out of her mouth and into a trash can]  Dang it!  My gum fell out of my mouth!

Cat

I'm gonna faint. I'm gonna puke. I'm gonna fuke!

Cat

  I fell off my bike, but I don't think I broke any of my parts.

Cat

  Boys, boys, boys!  Fighting is never the answer!  Now let's try using our words.

Cat

  Excuse me!  I am looking for an elderly man who I do not know and whose face I do not remember.  Has anyone seen an elderly man who I do not know and whose face I do not remember?

Cat

(to Ellie) Let's make a deal. How about we buy you any two desserts you want and you throw Poober in the toilet?

Sam

I don't have anywhere I really need to be, and you kinda seem like you need a roommate.

Cat

Are you saying what I think you're saying?!

Sam

Yeah.

Cat

Your gonna stay here with me in L.A. for a while and help me find a roommate?!

Sam

I already found you a roommate!

Cat

[throws her money on the couch] Shut up, who is she?!

Sam

Me!

Cat

Oh my god! [runs and hugs Sam] This is the best day ever! So much better than yesterday when we were in garbage.

Sam

Isn't it?

Dice

  You look like Sam from that web show iCarly.

Sam

  Nah, that chick is way hotter than me.

Cat

  (giggles) She is Sam!

Dice

  Woah, you're awesome!

Sam

  Yeah.

Sam

  Uh, what are you doing?

Cat

  I'm gonna sleep next to you so you don't get scared.

Sam

  I'm not gonna get scare— Oh, whatever.

Cat

  So, how long you going to be in L.A.?

Sam

  Uh… I don't know.

Cat

  Well, don't you want to get back to Seattle?

Sam

  Eh, I'm in no rush. I mean, my best friend moved to Italy with her dad, and my mom is kind of a nut job.

  Can you take Darby?  He's heavy!  [hands the baby to Cat]

Cat

  No, you guys, I gotta go!  Here.  [hands the baby to Sam]

Sam

  Woah, I don't want this beast!  [places the baby in a flower pot]  Oh, yeah, pretty flowers.