Michael [to Debbie]: I know how hard it was for you, raising me alone... and you did more than make the best of it. You were the best.
S5[Episode 503]
S5[Episode 504]
How long have you guys been together?
[Brian and Justin speak at the same time] Four years.
Four weeks.
S5[Episode 504]
The way gay men are obsessed with youth and beauty. An entire subculture convinced that the meaning of happiness is no love handles. How pathetic. How tragic. How profitable.
S5[Episode 504]
[As Melanie and Lindsey argue] Maybe I better go...
No, we are having tea, goddammit!
S5[Episode 504]
Are you sure you should be eating all that?
What goes in today gets sucked out tomorrow.
S5[Episode 504]
I'll make you a deal. I'll come check out your new place if you come check out ours.
Just like when we showed each other our dicks.
S5[Episode 504]
I'll bring a bottle.
Red would be nice.
I meant poppers.
S5[Episode 504]
[Referring to Justin witnessing Melanie and Lindsay fighting]
I'm just sorry you had to witness our performance.
Oh, please. Brian and I have had a couple of Academy Award winner's ourselves.
S5[Episode 504]
It's amazing.
That I've been soaping your crack for the past ten minutes and you haven't asked me to fuck you?
S5[Episode 504]
I'm not being cynical, I'm being--
Justin [mockingly]: Realistic.
Do you mind if I finish my own sentences? I despise when couples do that.
Huh, did you hear that rubby ducky? He said couples. I should quit while I'm ahead.
Not before you give me some, Mon Amour.
S5[Episode 504]
Mon Amour? I love how other people's tragic marital plight makes you romantic.
Hard.
Christ. What a big boner.
All the better--
To fuck me with?
What did I just warn you about--
About finishing each other's sentences.
S5[Episode 504]
MMonty
Which one of you is the gardener and which one of you is the chef?
I really like cooking.
And I love planting my seed in some hole... in the ground.
S5[Episode 504]
Come on, fellas. Don't tell me that after - how many did you say - 10 years together, you haven't had a little extra-marital ass?
EEli
Actually, we never have. It's called being in a mature, loving relationship.
That's called being dead.
S5[Episode 504]
DDarryl
[After harassing his ex] Come on, let's go!
[Bangs bat on counter] [Darryl turns around] What part of fuck off don't you understand?
DDarryl
Who the hell are you?
I'm the one with the baseball bat.
S5[Episode 504]
CClassmate
Hey faggot, here's 5 bucks. Why don't you suck me off?
I charge way more than that for asshole's like you.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Queer as Folk (US) pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.