Queer as Folk (US) quotes

Michael

You're probably going to think I'm crazy but you know what this street reminds me of?

Liberty Avenue.

Brian

Since when did you ever have the least interest in getting married?

Michael

I didn't! But not because I didn't want to. But because I never thought I could. It wasn't a story I told myself like straight kids did, you know, that someday I'd meet that special person and we'd fall in love and have a big wedding... it was never real for me.

Brian

We're queer. We don't need marriage, we don't need a sanction of dickless politicians and pederast priests. We fuck who we want to, when we want to. That is our god-given right.

Michael

But it's also our god-given right to have everything that straight people have. Because we're every bit as much human as they are.

And do you Ben promise to love, respect, and cherish Michael and be his true and faithful husband?

Hunter

Say 'I do,' dude.

Ben

I do.

Ted

Anyway, it's not just for Michael and Ben. If things had been different, maybe -

Emmett

No point in beating yourself up, Teddy. We're still friends, aren't we? Which means we'll be together a lot longer than most marriages.

Debbie

Shit, I just called you boys. You're married men now.

Lindsay

At least that's one good thing about not being allowed to marry.

Melanie

Not having to get a divorce.

Brian

Oh, come on officer, they're just a couple of crazy kids who fell in love and got hitched. Give 'em a break.

Did you bring any fruit into the country?

Debbie

Yeah, 250 of 'em. On bicycles.

Ma'am? Do you like smoked salmon?

Debbie

What does that have to do with anything?

Because of you don't shut up, you're going to spend the rest of your life in Nova Scotia.

Brian

Never should have had that second piece of wedding cake. But when the love of your life marries somebody else what choice do you have but to drown yourself in buttercream filling?

Brian

Fuck the doctors and fuck the nay-Sayers. I'm still young. I'm still g-g-g-gorgeous! I'm still hot.

Michael

You know it!

It looks like you've broken your clavicle.

Brian

And it hurts like a motherfucker.

Michael

They'll teach you to cruise guys no-handed.

Good news is it seems like it's a clean break, so it'll mend well.

Brian

Did I mention that it hurts like a mother fucker?

Michael

Is he gonna have to wear a cast?

Because of the way he injured himself, all he can do is rest.

Brian

I'm sure I mentioned that it hurts like a motherfucker.

(exasperated) We will give you some Vicodin for that.

Brian

(relieved) Hear that? Just like Babylon.

Michael

You're not seriously--?

Brian

Yes I am. Seriously!

Ben

But you're seriously injured!

Brian

Can we stop using the word 'seriously'?

Emmett

[reading a map intently] I think we should have taken a left at this little squiggle here.

Ted

I thought you knew how to read a map!

Emmett

Of course I do! You go down here, take a left at 'up yours' and continue on about three miles to 'go fuck yourself'!