Lindsay quotes from Parks and Recreation

Leslie

You might have a fancy car and a...mahogany purse or whatever rich people have but I remember something that you're trying to forget. You're a Pawnee girl.

Lindsay

No Leslie, I'm not.

Leslie

Then why do you come here at dinner time to get take out from the legendary JJ's Diner?

Lindsay

It's not for me! These waffles make great dog laxatives!

Leslie

Don't you dare feed that waffle to that dog to get it to poop.

Lindsay

[feeding the waffle to the dog] Sambuca need to make? There you go!

Leslie

HOW DARE YOU!?

Leslie

I will never apologize to her.

Lindsay

Nor I her.

Leslie

[In a mocking British accent] Nor I her! I doth proclaim to be a stupid fart face.

Lindsay

Nice retort. Did G.B. Shaw write that for you?

Leslie

Did G.B. Shaw write your stupid fart face!?

Lindsay

What's going on here?

Leslie

Hi Lindsay. Introducing the Pawnee Wiffleball League. It's an idea that I came up with after my best friend Ann over there said she wanted to bash your head in with a baseball bat.