Suzanne Warren quotes from Orange Is the New Black

There used to be a sign that said 'CAUTION! WET FLOOR! Really told people what was going on.

Sometimes the feelings inside me get messy like dirt. And I like to clean things. Pretend the dirt is the feelings. This floor is my mind. That is called coping. And the COs don't care 'cause they like things clean. And that is called symbiosis.

Sometimes people just don't want to play with you, and that's okay.

I am not crazy. I am unique.

Piper Chapman

I'm not your wife.

I threw my pie for you.

So there I am, topless, sitting on this bulldozer, like, in a construction site. So I'm sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties, and I'm like, "What the fuck? Again?" And then I look down and I see there's this dude down on the ground with his head by, like, the tire. And when I look closer, I see that the dude is wearing my shirt, barbeque sauce all over his face, and he's dead. That's when I knew it was time to make a change. Thank you.

Almost the exact same thing happened to me, but it was tuna salad.

Can I ask you one more question?

Piper Chapman

Yeah, of course.

How come everyone calls me 'Crazy Eyes'?