Scenes with Chapman 5
MMakonnen
You know, Captain, every year of my life, I grow more and more convinced that the wisest and best is to fix our attention on the good and the beautiful...
CACrow [as Chapman]
Don't hit him...
MMakonnen
...if you just take the time to look at it.
CChapman
You're some guy, Makonnen.
. . .
MAMike [as Makonnen]
You know, Captain...
CACrow [as Chapman]
Shut up, Ray.
. . .
[Chapman has just landed his ship solo]
Mike [as Chapman] Wow, how did I manage to land without that mincing co-pilot jabbering on about the good and the beautiful?
[After shrinking out of his spacesuit and then fighting tiny people, Chapman is put on trial.]
JEJudge Eden
Man from Earth, you are accused of causing injury to one of our people.
CChapman
I thought I was being attacked, and I defended myself.
SAServo [as Chapman]
…with courage and nudeness.
[Chapman is confused by Eden's explanation of how his ship was landed.]
CChapman
I don't understand.
SSessom
There are many things you will not understand here…
CACrow [as Sessom]
…being an obvious doorknob.
[Lt. White, from the rescue ship, has found Chapman lying on the ground in his spacesuit.]
SAServo [as White]
You got any gum?
CChapman
He's dead. Gone.
MAMike [as Chapman]
He kept yapping about beauty, so I shot him out the airlock.
[The rescue ship flies away from Rheton]
CChapman
Now they'll never believe me...
MAMike [as Chapman]
[Unemotionally] I'll have to kill them all.
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Mystery Science Theater 3000 · 3,167 quotes
