Toki Wartooth quotes from Metalocalypse

Pickles

Guys I'm really worried about Nathan. Dating a fan is kind of a no-no.

Toki

What abouts a quicks humps with a groupies. What ams wrongs with thats?

Skwisgaar

Well, Tokis, you cans humps all the groupies you wants but, you know...

Pickles

But don't make a fan your girlfriend!

Murderface

Why not?!

Pickles

Because fans are crazy obsessed weirdos, you can't have a real relationship with them! Mark my words! He'll see! It always ends badly! [Nathan enters] What a sad dildoooo...[notices Nathan] Hi.

Nathan

...Hi.

Toki

[disgusted] Uhhh, come on guys, we gots to gos to a meetings.

Nathan

Yeah you're right. Let's go. Charles always gets pissed off when were late, you know? [chuckles; Charles walks in] He's such an uptight [notices him standing right beside him] diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiildooooooooooooooo-hi.

Ofdensen

[not amused] ...Hi.

Skwisgaar

Oh my Gods, looks at dis place.

Nathan

Sweaty nerds!

Toki

Ugh, cosplay geeks!

Pickles

Dethklok furries!

Skwisgaar

Just what we needs, more homoskektuals fanfictions.

Toki

[upon seeing a naked picture of him] Hey looks that ams a really good renderings of my abs!

Can you guys get out of my way? I wanna...buy a Dethklok comic book.

Murderface

Where did you get a 100 ounce Coca-Cola?

It's a galloner...

Nathan

Can I ask you something, did you eat all that garlic crazy bread?

[moving on] Yeah...

Nice Nathan outfit!

Nathan

Thanks. [Pickles gorans] ...Fat Pickles...

Skwisgaar

Hey fat Pickle, you don't know wheres the Tringles exhibition is, do you?

Oh, I do, it's over there...

Skwisgaar

Ams thats supposed to be me?

Are you guys smoking? You know that's bad for you...

Nathan

[clearly annoyed] Thank you for the, uh, heath advice. Come on let's go!

Skwisgaar

[about the special costumes Toki made them wear for the Diversity event] Holy shit, guys! We ams dressed likes the fuckings Klans!

Pickles

Toki, your special outfits, while very comfortable, are going to get us killed!

Toki

[watching on TV having been left behind at Mordhaus] Ah, you fuckers left me again!

Murderface

Watch this. You're about to witness the art of a prank call. [dials phone]

Toki

[phone rings] Hello?

Murderface

[in a high pitched voice] I'm a little old lady and I'd like to come over!

Toki

Uhhh, I'ms ins a stupid meetings, buts uh...maybe you cans come over laters. Who is this?

Murderface

We can order pizza!

Toki

Oh I loves pizza! How did you gets my number?

Toki

Hello? Some nice old lady just hungs up on me! Oh I hope she's okay!

Skwisgaar

One moment, Toki. Hello, this ams Skwisgaar Skwigelf-uh speakings.

Murderface

[different voice] This is a divorced overweight, African-American lady. Can I come over?

Skwisgaar

Maybe I cans squeeze you ins?

Nathan

[holding the record] Guys do you think the red in this album cover is too pink?! This looks like fucking soup! It looks like pink tomato soup! Can we send it back and ask them to make it more blood red?

Ofdensen

Nathan, I'm sorry but the albums have already shipped!

Pickles

Told you so.

Ofdensen

It's too late.

Skwisgaar

Huh, dats ams weirds...uh...

Toki

Oh what happened?

Skwisgaar

Dis lady calls me and says she's horny and thens shes HANGS UPS ON ME! ... I hope she ams okay...

Nathan

Okay, did you remember to pack your deady bear?

Toki

Yeps.

Nathan

Kay, you got your fluoride whore's blood extra-whitening toothpaste with flavor crystals?

Toki

Yeps.

Nathan

You got your pentagram crackers, right?

Toki

Yeps.

Nathan

You got your severed fingerpaints?

Toki

Yeps.

Nathan

You got your Dante's Inferno Seven Layers of Hell coloring book?

Toki

Yeps.

Nathan

You got your My Little Disemboweled Pony lunch box, right?

Toki

Yeps.

Nathan

You got your Rock-A-Rooni disguise so no one knows who you are, right?

Toki

[puts on a baseball cap] Yeps, as long as I wears dis, no one will knows that I'm famous!

Nathan

Good. And of course, you got your insulin and your needles, right?

Toki

Yeps, never leaves my sides.

Toki

You know what? Dis ams bullshit! I'm not just some dildo jack-off campers! My names Toki Wartooth, and I'm in Dethkloks! [audience gasps at his identity] Now I'ms taking my snow globes and gettings the fuck outta here! [turns to get his snow globe, which is missing from it's spot] Oh no, where's my snow globes?

You mean thiiiis? [holds up the snow globe and smashes it on the ground, Toki stands upset] Oops. [laughs]

Nathan

[picking up the snow globe] Oh shit little kid...you just fucked up real bad...