Lilo & Stitch: The Series · Season 1
[Gantu captures Fibber and returns to his ship; he tries to lie to Hämsterviel to cover up his spa vacation]
No, no, no. I wasn't on vacation. [Fibber beeps loudly] It was an educational conference. [Fibber beeps again]
You lying lump of rubber! You're on probation! [disconnects; Gantu sighs and facepalms]
Y'know, Fib, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
[they both drink their sodas and Fibber gives out a loud belch]
I tell you, bra, I'm giving you the kind deal. They don't 'em like this no more.
Hmm. You sure the body's in ok shape?
You kiddin'? All-metal body, chrome trim. No plastic junk like today.
[As the driver washes his car, Experiment 586's pod gets wet and activated]
'Cause you know, we got a rust problem in Hawaii. This island air eats cars like nothing else in the universe. [Experiment 586 starts eating the car, leaving only the rubber tires] Except maybe him.
[Experiment 586 grows a little bigger, roars, and runs away, laughing]
Sorry, bra. Deal's off.
Hey, Gantu, ever thought about growing a goatee?
No!
I'm serious. Because with your bone structure, it would look very spiffy.
Really?
Sure. May I? [grabs a pencil and draws a mustache and goatee on Gantu's face] There. See? [holds up a mirror]
Not funny!
What? I think it looks nice. Helps disguise a few of those chins! [laughs]
Warning. Experiment 586 activated.
"Primary function: metal consumption. Experiment grows exponentially larger with everything it eats."
[Mertle and the girls are calling for a radio contest to win tickets to an Elizabethan festival]
Come on, come on!
Congratulations, Caller 12!
What?! Already!
I won?!
[the girls turn to see that Lilo was the lucky caller via payphone]
Yes! You and a group of your closest friends and adult guardians are going to the Elizabethan festival!
I don't believe it!
I won the contest for you. Now we can all go to the festival.
Nu-uh! We have somewhere better to be. Right, girls?
Well... not really.
According to their homepage, the festival is way cool!
Plus, we're sick of playing dolls!
Really?
Fine, if you wanna go with the freak, then go! I'm staying here!
[pause]
Okay! [they leave with Lilo and Stitch]
[Pleakley is getting his costume ready for the festival]
I'm so excited! My first festival dedicated to primitive Earth history! Are you dressed yet?
[dressed as King Henry VIII] Dressed, yes. Happy, no!
Cheer up. Henry VIII was a powerful ruler, even though he had a nasty habit of having his wives beheaded!
I am liking this Henry person! [laughs]
[Stitch, angered that he's not allowed to go to the festival, sees Mertle and pounces on her]
What's the matter? Upset that your friend dumped you?
[releases Mertle] Amagata!
Face it. You know she'd trade up someday.
Kachuga naga!
[Since Lilo is too busy with the girls, Stitch reluctantly takes Mertle to find Experiment 586, who has grown huge due to all the metal it has eaten]
We're not here because of that thing, are we?
Ih!
I don't like this anymore. Take me home!
[Stitch leaps out of the buggy]
Hey, come back!
[Stitch throws a mailbox into 586's face, but it does not hurt it]
Kachumba!
[586 kicks Stitch to the hood of the buggy]
I'm never gonna get home with you in charge!
[Tank rampages through the festival, with Gantu's ship in hot pursuit]
Where should we hide?!
I say we hide in the blacksmith's!
No, the dueling buckets booth!
We don't hide. That ship is trying to catch the experiment, but we have to beat him to it!
But why?
'Cause we're the good guys, and the good guys don't chicken out just 'cause the bad guy has a gigantic spaceship with advanced alien technology.
Mertle was right: You really are weird.
YYEEEEEAAAAHHHH!!
[Gantu holds Stitch and Mertle hostage after accidentally capturing them]
I swear something's different about you. No shoes? Wait, I got it! Perm and red highlights!
Hey, that was pretty funny what you did that tubby guy. You know, the face.
Really? You think so?
Oh, yeah! I know how be mean to people. What you did, it was special.
I'm glad you said that, 'cause I was afraid I wasn't pushing the envelope. Y'know? Thinking outside the box.
I hear ya.
Hey, I got a prank I'm working on right now. You wanna take a look? I mean, if you got time.
I got nothing but time!
[chuckles] Oh, right. It's in the other room. [presses a button, releasing Mertle] I call it "Ants in Gantu's Pants". That's figurative, by the way...
[Mertle grabs 625 and traps him in her own containment chamber]
That was so easy, it was sad. [releases Stitch] Come on. Let's get outta here.
[Gantu departs with Tank. Stitch prepares to go after them.]
[calls out to Stitch before he can go after Gantu and Tank, prompting Stitch to turn to her] [to Stitch] Wait! Stitch, it's okay. I let the experiment go.
[surprised] Huh?
I'd rather lose that experiment than lose my best friend. Stitch... I'm really sorry I didn't treat you right. I got carried away 'cause I wanted the girls to like me... but that's no excuse for neglecting you.
[embraces Lilo] [accepting] It's okay.
[Lilo apologizes to Stitch for not treating him right and Stitch accepts her apology and forgives her; Mertle watches the whole thing from a pole]
Mertle?
[slides down] My friends! You've come back!
Here's the thing: we tried going with Lilo, and didn't exactly work out. So...
We were thinking of going back to you, but only if we do something besides play dolls all the time.
Oh, really? And what makes you think I would even take you back? I had a lot of fun without you. I chased a monster, then I got sucked into a gigantic spaceship, then...
Maybe this was a bad idea.
Yeah! Being alone has made her weird.
Uh, just kidding! So, let's just be friends again. [the three girls continue glaring at Mertle; defeated] And play less dolls.
[Lilo finds an experiment pod on the floor in the post office while dropping off a letter to her pen-pal]
Look what I found. It was right there on the floor. It must have been in somebody's mail. Experiment 509.
Hmmm... 509. Agricultural experiment.
It's a plant?
Experiment. Designs to be violent and indestructible. Looks like harmless plant one moment, but suddenly rises up like savage beast and attacks!
Let's activate it, so we can find its one true place.
[snatches the pod from Lilo] No, no, no! Too risky.
But we could make friends with it, and then it won't attack.
You're wanting to make friends with a plant? [laughs] Oh, is very compassionate, also silly! [puts the pod in a drawer and locks it] No. Impossible to activate without causing extreme destruction. Of course, is fun for me, but for planet's sake, I'm putting away, permanently.
But--
End of discussion! Not looking so sad. Hundreds of experiments left on the loose, wreaking havoc on island. Make friends with those.
[Mertle challenges Lilo to compete against her in the orchid growing contest in the Kokaua Town Fair while Stitch trains himself to enter the rodeo; Pleakley is using a jackhammer to sew seeds into his garden]
Pleakley, can you help me grow an orchid for the town fair?
Town fair? What town fair?
Kokaua Town Fair. They have rides and food and competitions for stuff like flowers.
What about pineapples?
There's a homegrown fruits and vegetables competition.
Homegrown fruits?! I could enter... my Pinormous! [gestures to his gigantic pineapple plant] Pinarmous will revolutionize Hawaii's pineapple industry. And then... IT WILL REVOLUTIONIZE THE WORLD!!!
[chuckles] You are starting to sound like evil genius.
Maybe, but... I'm be an evil genius for good!
Always it starts that way. Here is evil genius fertilizer you are requesting.
What about my orchid?!
Sorry, Lilo. I can't waste my precious time on something as renowned as an orchid. My Pinormous needs me, and the world needs my Pinormous! [notices some bamboo shoots growing] AAH!! My personal Eden is being invaded by bamboo runners!
Runners?
Underground roots spreading their grasping, choking evil from the mother plant. Couldn't you ever plant this to contain the roots so it won't keep spreading? So inconsiderate!
[Lilo goes to the rental hut to ask Nani to help her grow an orchid]
I'm sorry, Lilo, but I don't have time to help you with the fair. I'm working.
But I want to enter something.
Uh, miss? Do you have another mask? This one doesn't fit quite right.
Oh, yes, sir. [gives the diver another mask] Here you go. [to Lilo] If you'd told me weeks ago...
BUT I ONLY JUST FOUND OUT TODAY!!
Lilo! I have a customer.
Uh, miss? This mask doesn't fit right either.
Uh, okay. [gives the diver another mask] Here. Try this one.
[as the two sisters talk, Stitch, still practicing to be a cowboy, wheres flippers as boots and twirls two snorkels as if they were guns]
But I gotta enter something! Mertle's entering orchids, Pleakley's entering a huge evil pineapple, Stitch is going to be a cowboy at the rodeo.
[to Stitch] Cowboys where boots, not flippers. [to Lilo] Look, it takes a long time to grow an orchid. Maybe you could enter next year.
Oh, uh, miss? I'm sorry, but this one...
THE MASK DOESN'T FIT BECAUSE YOUR HEAD IS SHAPED WEIRD!!!! [storms out the hut]
Bachuga! [follows Lilo]
[chuckles nervously] Kids.
[Lilo and Stitch go to the fair carrying Sprout on a wagon]
Howdy, stranger. [Stitch glares at him angrily] I hear you're the only bullrider in this here competition. [Stitch nods] You see this? I got five of'em. One for each time I won the rodeo. And I don't expect to lose the sixth time... to a stranger.
Ihkata....
Help me get Sprout in place, then you can kick that cowboy's rear in the rodeo.
[reluctantly] Bachoo.
[laughs] Hey, son! A real cowboy don't get told what to do by a little girl!
[Stitch grumbles angrily as he takes Sprout to the orchid competition]
[Lilo and Stitch retreats to the old water tower after Sprout lands on the ground and grows into a giant plant monster]
All my fault. Jumba locked the experiment in the drawer because he knew it was dangerous, and I took it anyways just so I could beat Mertle. I messed up everything.
Ih.
You could at least pretend that I didn't mess up so bad, just to make me feel better.
I cannot.
Ugh! Fine!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Lilo & Stitch: The Series pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
