Rachel‘Scuse me. Can I just get through there for a second? Sorry.
Rachel
Uh, Mr. Greenfield?
Yes, but you may know me as… the cloaked avenger!
Rachel
Uh, no.
Oh. Well, before your time, I expect…it was a big TV show in the 70s. Would you like an autograph photo?
Rachel
No, no, no, no. Uh, you requested a pickup for your dog, uh, an hour’s exercise at 2pm.
Oh, yes. Of course. (standing up) I’ll get it. (He shows Rachel a dog named Cloak Girl) This is Cloak Girl! Of course, she’s not the original cloak girl. She was played by an actress, C.C. Walmier. C.C. gave me this, Cloak Girl, when she was just a puppy. Oh, C.C. was so beautiful. I asked her to marry me, then we had this silly argument over the width of some drapes. I went to Spain to do a Spaghetti Western…and I never saw her again.
Oh! She likes you. She’s barking.
Rachel
Yeah. She’s not the only one.
Hey, have you seen it’s a massive roller parked outside?
I wonder what it belongs to.
Bradley brought that home.
Yeah. Well, I had to. I finished at the restaurant. It was closed. The customers are left. There’s one car left over, so I thought I’d bring it home for safety.
Rachel
So, do I look stupid?
Well, a little bit more stupid than Zena, but less stupid than Wonder Woman.
Rachel, I had no idea. When did you join the Power Rangers?
Rachel
Shut up, Jon. I lost the cloaked avenger’s dog and now I have to take her place.
Well, then shouldn’t you be fetching sticks and wearing up trays?
Rachel
I have to take her place when he opens some tire shop tomorrow and until I find his dog, I have to keep on taking her place every time. He appears in public… and I have to wear this stupid costume.
Okay. Um, Bradley? I’ve got the manager at cafe goffi on the phone. He wants to know if you’ve got any idea what’s happened to his car. A Rolls-Royce?
Hello, Mr. Riskin. Yeah, it’s perfectly safe as good as new. Well, apart from the little mayonnaise stain when I went for the driving.
RMr. Riskin
(talking to him on the phone)
Yeah, but it wasn’t my fault. The cheerleaders were hungry! But they wanted to ride. This isn’t sounding too good, is it? Yeah, Yeah. Okay, I’ll ask him. (putting it back) (to his band mates) That was Mr. Riskin. He said he’s too busy to come over, but he wants one of you lot to fire me.
Bradley, you’re fired. Now get a job.
Rachel
(speaking to him on the phone) Mr. Parker. Hi. It’s Rachel. Rachel from Puppy Cities International. Hi. Yeah, um… I’m outside a tire store at the moment, but, um… Well, it’s a long story, but I’m afraid I’m running a little late. Um, I won’t be able to get Mr. Dibbles back until about half past 3.
No problem. I’ve got stuff I can do.
Rachel
Good. I’ll see you later.
Well, I’ll just head back to work and come to you at 4pm.
Rachel
I’m sorry again about the delay in getting your dog back to you, Mr. Parker.
Oh, don’t sweat it, Rachel. Besides, you really did me a favor.
Hey, over there. Isn’t that the cloaked avenger?
Oh, wow! I loved your show as a kid! I had a cloaked avenger outfit. I wore it every Halloween!
Could I have your autograph? I-I know I have a pad in there somewhere.
How the heck did she get in here?
Rachel
She must have stowed away when you picked Mr. Dibbles up yesterday. Oh, and look. She’s made a little nest under the seat. Ugh!
Obviously, I’ll pay to have your repulse shampooed.
Oh, no. It’s not necessary. Actually, it’s a privilege.
Rachel
Okay, Cloak Girl, time for my nightmare to end.
After her! Follow that dog!
Rachel
Cloak Girl, stop!
CCC.C.
Hold on. I-I recognized that dog.
Rachel
Bradley!
Come on! Hurry up, otherwise we’ll be late for Joni’s exhibits.
Rachel
Yeah, and we’re due at the cloaked Avenger’s wedding at 3pm. Can’t wait see what the cloaked wedding dress looks like.
I can’t believe Joni’s got the nerve to try and sell her paintings. Already, I mean she’s only been going to that art class for 2 weeks.
Yeah, I can’t believe we’re not DJs anymore. I don’t understand it. Every day at 2 o’clock Jerry would go off and be gone for at least an hour. Why did he have to come back at five past?
Rachel
Yeah. Well, we’ll never know, will we? Best not to think about it.
Well, the main thing is that we raised the $200 and Wally repaired the building and Joni’s none the wiser.
Hmm. It has the certain naive charm. A primitive appeal that evokes cubism surrealism, and yet, remains defiantly…
A picture of Brad holding a dog over his.
This is so embarrassing, I mean, who’s gonna buy this, huh?
Well, according to the ticket, it’s already been sold.
Man’s Best Friend. You know, this was the first one to sell. I was gonna spend the money today on rewiring our building because, well, it was a bit of a death trap, but then when I came and looked this morning, I found that somebody had already rewired it. So I think I’m gonna spend all the money on myself. Oh. Gotta go.
Who the heck will pay $1,000 for a picture like that?
Come on, Tina. Look. Look. It’s obvious.
Hey! My mum’s just bought my dad a new extension lead for a strimmer. Now he can really get stuck into that scruffy bit of more grass behind the shed. Isn’t that
WOWoman on TV
I don’t know who to dress.
I think we’re getting into a rut here. I mean we’ve been in L.A. for months now and nothing seems to be happening for us.
Yeah. I think we need a change.
Joni Alert! Joni Alert! Joni Alert!
I thought she was in an assertiveness workshop!
I’m sorry, but that woman needs assertiveness like the desert needs sand.
Look at this place! It’s a tip!
Gosh, she’s gonna kill us!
Rachel
Yeah, do you remember the last time she saw this place in a mess?
This place is a mess! Look at it! I mean don’t you ever clean it up? It’s disgusting! (to the rest of the band mates) Listen up, everybody! The terms of your lease say that this place must be kept clean or I can throw you out at any time.
I’ve got to go and see a man about the goose.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no you don’t! No!
Erm. How was the assertiveness course?
Hmm? What course? All that. No. I didn’t go, didn’t go, I couldn’t. Not since I tried meditating while driving and, oops, ran my car into the ditch.
Car was the total right off. So, place is looking good, by the way.
Are you alright? You’re not injured. Anything not.
Especially like in the brain.
Oh, no. I’m okay. As a matter of fact, I’ve never been more okay and all my life. Especially since I met the tow truck guy. Yep, loves me a truck.
Rachel
Okay, Joni. What’s his name? What does he do and where does he come from?
His name is Jim who lives in Arizona and he doesn’t just drive a tow truck. He raises snakes for the movies.
And that’s not all. We’re getting married!
Yeah. Isn’t that great? Jim Bob and I were so in love. We’re just gonna sell up and start at this snake ranch in Tucson.
Sell up? You can’t do that. What’s gonna happen to us?
Don’t be selfish, Bradley. Congratulations. It’s amazing here.
What is gonna happen to us now?
I think we should give it one more try.
Yeah, okay. We should just go straight up to our so-called agent and say “Amish. Either things starts to happen.” or “We’re outta there.”
And then they’ll be begging us to stay.
TRTina, Rachel, Bradley and Hannah
Yeah.
Okay, so I’ll call him and see if he’ll meet us at the cafe.
No. Don’t go. I’m begging you. What do you want? Just-Just tell me. I’ll do anything if you’ll stay. Please. (finishing his conversation on his phone) Roffers. He’ll wait 6 months for him to show up and then the first great offer that comes along. They-They drop you faster than a pooper-scooper with a hole in it. Say you don’t happen to know anything about guttering, do you, Jo?
Anyway, enough about my problems. What about yours?
You do not want to hear about our problems, Mr. Walters.
Hey, sure. I do your problems or my problems, unless they have to do with a dry skin conditioner. In that case, you’re on your own.
Well, we did have one question for you.
And for once, we’d like to hear an honest answer.
Hey. Hit me with it. Honesty is my middle name.
Rachel
That is such a lie.
So, are we ever gonna make it here in L.A.?
And if so, what are you gonna do about it right now to make sure it happens?
It’s difficult, it’s very difficult.
And your final answer is…
I don’t know. I think I’m gonna have to get a regular builder to do the guttering.
I hate… Look, I’m sending your tape to a big producer friend of mine. I’m sure he’s gonna love it.
Is he really any chance related to that other big producer you were talking about last time?
Hey, hey, hey. No, no. This guy is straight up, honest. He’s a head honcho at Polymer Records. He’s a big big friend of mine.
Rachel
Great. What’s his name?
It’s been nice not working with you.
L.A. 7 · 159 quotes
