JoeWow. For someone who ruined our world tour you think he'd have more trouble sleeping.
I think I know what'll wake him up. (Kevin touches Nick's keyboard)
Don't touch my keyboard. (wakes up after Kevin touched the keyboard)
All right, good. You're awake.
Joe
Me and Kevin figured out a way for you to learn this geometry stuff a lot easier. All right, here we go. (Kevin is strumming his guitar)
Guys, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but that's just one law of geometry. There are dozens of those for me to know.
Joe
Well, let's a'singing.
This is gonna be better than a Christmas album. (rock music playing)
It's the next day and Nick has taken his retest. Let's check in as they anxiously await the result. (Nick growls when Macy puts the camera close to his face) On second thought, I think it's best to give them their space. (backs away from Kevin, Joe and Nick)
(runs upstairs) Nick, it's your geometry teacher.
(walks to Tom and takes the phone to talk to his teacher on it) Yeah? No. Yeah. No. Yeah. Okay, bye. (hangs up the phone)
Joe
No, he needs a perfect score.
But my teacher said I could make up the last point if I calculate the volume of nacho cheese spread consumed by each screaming fan per cubic foot of arena space.
What does that even mean?
That means the tour is back on. You did it.
Joe
Yes!
Whoo-hoo! Oh, I'm so relieved. This means I won't have to spend the summer picking through garage sales with your mother. I mean, how many old fire helmets can one woman have? I get it, we live in a firehouse.
Whoo, what drama. The bigger-and-better-than-the-last-tour tour, was on again, off again, and now it's back on again thanks to Nick acing his test. Yay, Nick!
This is been an incredible journey and a very difficult decision. But as you know, I can only take three of you on tour with me. So, Olivia... Lulu... and Grace, you will be coming on tour with me. And to the others, I want you to stay in tune until I come home. (sighs) I will miss you. (he walks away)
Come on, Joe. I want to see what you look like. (Joe walks out of the bathroom) You look-- you look great.
Joe
I'm gonna miss you, Stell. (hugs her goodbye)
Aw, don't start. I'm gonna cry. And I can't be responsible for how cute I might look.
Joe
You sure, you okay with this?
Yeah, I mean, I just have to get used to the fact that you're a rock star with girl fans. Just don't forget about the girl back home that sews your pants.
Joe
Of course I won't. What's her name again? (Stella slaps Joe friendly when he forgots her name then Joe smiles)
You remember Joe's flip and split? Well, he finally went for it and I got it. But there's a little glitch. You'll see it.
Joe
Okay, for the first time ever... tried by a lead singer. Rock and roll! (doing a flip and split but failed)
I'm fine. I'm fine. Just something coming out of my nose, and I think it's my tooth.
Joe
L.A., baby.
Gentlemen, let me present to you le crib de la Jonas. Game room.
Joe
Bathroom.
BMBig Man
Occupied. (toilet flushes)
Joe
Sorry, big man. This summer in L.A. is gonna be epic.
Play all day, party all night.
Let's get busy. Maybe we'll get busy tomorrow. (Kevin is snoring on a floatie then Joe and Nick flipped it over) (Kevin yelps)
Joe
Ha ha. (he and Nick high five each other at the swimming pool)
Joe
It's so cool that mom and dad let us come here for the whole summer.
Well, yeah, with an eldest brother this trustworthy, they can actually relax.
Joe
So in this scenario you're kind of like our L.A. dad.
You have two hands. Make yourself a sandwich.
Joe
Guys, we're free now. We can eat whatever we want whenever we want.
Yeah, if we had any food.
Joe
We can just ask Macy and Stella to stop somewhere on the way home from the airport.
Nice, Joe-- putting your girlfriend to work before she even gets here.
Joe
She's not my girlfriend yet. I haven't even seen her since the tour started.
She does know that you want to be her boyfriend, right?
Joe
Absolutely. Probably.
Joe, what exactly did you say to her?
Joe
I said, "hey, we're gonna be in L.A. The whole summer." And she was like, "oh, cool, I can totally come." And I was like, "huh?" And she was like, "yeah." And I was like, "cool."
That's even vague in Joe language.
Joe, if you want to be with Stella, you have to tell her.
Joe
Guys, trust me. I've got this covered. When I see her tonight I'm gonna say it loud and clear. Stella Malone, will you be my girlfriend?
Joe
See? Kev likes it.
Joe
Mom's not gonna get that, is she?
Rights of freedom, my man.
Nick, neihgbros. What's up, buddy? Whoo! JONAS in the house!
BMBig Man
No strangers in the house!
I'm not a stranger. I live next door. You see, the haters call me Dennis Zimmer, but the players call me D.Z.
BMBig Man
Let me run them through the lab.
So when's the party, guys?
Joe
What party?
He's messing with me, right? Let me break it down to you, okay, guys? In L.A., if you don't throw a party, you don't get invited to the parties, okay? Then the paparazzi forget you. Then the media forget you. Then the fans forget you.
Joe
How do you know so much about this?
I watch a lot of "So, Where are they now?" shows.
Actually, I think this sneezy guy might have a point.
Look, if that's the way this town works, then I say bring it. We're known for our parties, am I right?
I thought we were known for smelling super good, or is that just me? (Nick and Kevin smell themselves).
Hey, thanks for the tip. We're gonna announce ourselves with authority. I'll take care of the guest list.
I'll take care of the music.
Joe
I'll take care of my looks.
Nice, Joe. Way to be a team player.
Joe
Dude, I gotta look good for Stella.
Okay, so Barnaby is still with us... I think. (Aunt Lisa chuckles) Barnaby. Barnaby. (cat meows, growls)
Now listen, I know I'm your chaperone this summer, but remember, I'm the cool aunt, okay? You can tell me anything.
Stella's gonna date Joe from JONAS.
What? I'm calling your mom.
Aunt Lisa. I thought you were the cool aunt.
Not when it comes to dating rock stars. I made that mistake once. Okay, 12 times.
No, Joe's different. I mean, I've known him since we were little kids. He's funny. And he's sweet and smart.
Yeah, and he's still a rock star. Look, honey, I just-- there's always gonna be another girl, and I just don't want to see you get hurt.(melodic ring tone playing)
That's Joe's ring. Where's my phone?
I'm sorry. Find it. Find it.
Joe
Hey, Stell, hope you landed okay. Anyway, we're throwing a party tonight. Can't wait to see you. Call me. Oh, sorry.
It's fine. I'm fine. Wow, you're Joe from JONAS.
Joe
Vanessa Page. Your show rocks. Me and my brothers never miss an episode of "Malibu High."
That means so much, because I love your work.
Joe
Seriously?
So seriously. Your last album helped me get through a bad haircut.
Joe
Glad I could help.
Joe
Yeah.
Okay, I'm in Hollywood. I can do this. (dials) Hey babe, party, JONAS. Be there. It's Nick. Yeah, from JONAS. (dial tone) Babe? She's not coming.
Why don't you let me be the entertainment? I got mad skills. Check this out. (beat boxing) D.Z. On the beats, getting honey on the streets.
Oh, you like that? Whoo! Kevin, neighbro, k-dog.
This is the best organic clothing store in L.A. Everything here biodegrades before it goes out of style.
Joe
Cool.
Joe
I knew that so much. So are you working on anything new this summer?
Well, this is totes hush-hush, but you know the "forever April" books?
Joe
Yeah, I love anything with ghosts.
Well, you're looking at one. I'm playing April in the movie.
Joe
That's awesome. I'd love to be in one of those.
Joe
No, it's just I've always wanted to.
Joe, don't want-- Do. Oh, here. Try this on for your party tonight.
Joe
How did you know about that?
Everybody knows. And yes, I'm coming. Go.
Joe
Okay. (melodic ringtone playing)
Joe
Good afternoon, Stella. You smell nice. Is that a new perfume? No. Stella, what's up? Yeah, I rode a motorcycle here. Formal, casual. Formal, casual. Stella, meet your boyfriend. You're so lame. How do I look?
Joe
You didn't even look at me.
Joe, I've been looking at you my entire life.
Joe
I'm changing.
Listen, Stella likes you for you, not for what you wear. Please don't be so shallow. (phone rings) Yeah. That's good. No, A-list-- that's what we're going for. Thank you. Unbelievable. Could you please take these to the pool? I'm getting good at this. (car horn honks) Hey.
Joe
She's here.
Gentlemen, say hello to our new best friend.
Oh, I was hoping, but I never expected-- you're talking about the car. Cool.
Joe
You bought a car.
Not just any car. This baby is a fully modified, Retrofitted biodiesel cruising machine. And it runs on cooking oil.
Kevin, you were in charge of music. (engine revs)
Sounds like a sweet symphony to me. (Joe sniffs the car)
Joe
Smells like a side of french fries.
I've been busting my butt all day trying to get this party together, and your contribution is buying yourself a car?
It's not just for me. It's for all of us. And it even can fit Stella and Macy.
Joe
Yeah, if they ever get here.
Joe
Hey, Stell
He calls you Stell. It's a cute nickname. It's affectionate.
My rocker had a nickname for me too-- Lis, as in, "hey, Lis, it's over. Can I get my cat back?" Could he, Barnaby? (Barnaby meows)
Joe
Hope you landed okay.
He's aware of your itinerary. And he cares about your safety.
Joe
Anyway, we're throwing a party tonight.
Stop. Okay, big question-- who is "we Is it "we" as in him and his brothers Or "we" as in him and--
The laker girls? Let's roll.
Okay, can I say something? Joe called and said he can't wait to see you. So let's go to Aunt Lisa's, get super pretty And go blow up the party. What do you say?
(sighs) I say yes. And you know what? When I see Joe, everything will just be clear.
Hi, hello. Yeah, I'm gonna need a push over here. So just put your back into it. Thanks.
Hey, fans. It's Macy here again. We are at the crib de la JONAS, which is really bad spanish, but it's still a pretty cool place. Let's check in with the guys and see what they have planned this summer. So Kevin, what's up?
Oh, hey. Just feeding my baby. Found out bacon grease made her backfire. But what she really loves is Chinese. So big shout to all my friends over at hunan lotus. Thanks for sending over all that peanut oil. Oh, and keep frying up those greasy egg rolls.
Joe
This book's got it all-- It's got adventure, romance. The cover's pretty cool. And the movie's starring Vanessa Page, although she told me to keep that totes hush-hush.
You realize this is going on the web?
Joe
Can we do that over?
Say hello to our new summer roommate.
Hi. I spoke to Stella's mom and we decided the best way to chaperone these girls was up close and personal.
Just doing a video blog about what the band is up to this summer.
Just working on a california-inspired song.
Oh, can you give the fans a preview?
(plays one note) We've only been here one day.
Yo, what's up, people? D.Z. Here. And this summer I plan to spend 24/7 with JONAS. I mean, if the days were longer, We'd probably spend 25/8, right?
BMBig Man
You got my muffins?
Okay, well, that was the behind-the-scenes look. Macy Misa is saying Welcome to a summer like no other.
What are you doing? (Joe is screaming)
Saving Joe. What are you doing?
Joe
Nick, Vanessa said there might be a part for me in her movie. We're working out my acting chops.
Okay, that explains nothing. And you?
You know I've always wanted to be a director.
At least for the last couple of weeks.
Well, I've always wanted to go to sleep, so please keep it down, okay? (Joe screams) Joseph!
Joe
Sorry, I bit my tongue. All right, let's do it again.
Okay, down. And... (Joe screams)
Okay, so this is an expression drill. The first one is gonna be happy. Action! And sad. Scared. Okay, enamored.
Joe
What's that?
You know, like when you like somebody, you have feelings for them. Action!
Joe
Dude, I'm not giving you my love face.
It's not for me. You know, just picture me as a girl. You know, and you're trying to impress me. Action!
Joe
All I can think about is Stella.
Joe
Be right back.
Joe
Vanessa, hey.
Joe
Always. For what?
Well, I talked to my director about who should play my love interest in "Forever April," and, dramatic pause, she wants a Joe from JONAS type.
Joe
I can play that.
Joe
That's amazing. I'm gonna be in a movie.
Totally. The audition is today.
Joe
Whoa whoa, wait. There's an audition?
Oh, it's just a formality.
Joe
But they're looking for me. How am I supposed to play myself?
Joe, don't worry. The part is as good as yours. We're gonna play boyfriend and dead girlfriend.
Joe
The director said she wants a Joe from JONAS type. How do I look more Joe-ish?
Okay, how about something from your last music video? So a leather jacket... you like that?
Joe
Oh, yeah.
-...And glasses - How about a bandanna?
Joe
- Classic Joe.
Hi, they just emailed me the scenes for your audition later.
Joe
Cool. Just put it over there.
I don't know, man. I was looking them over, and they're pretty emotional. I think we should go over it.
Joe
Kevin, what do you really know about directing?
Well, as much as you really know about acting.
Joe
The whole thing's practically a done deal.
You know, Kevin's right. I mean, you've never done this before. You should prepare.
Joe
It's all about my look. Vanessa said the whole audition's a formality.
Vanessa? Well, she would know.
Joe
You know there's nothing going on between us, right?
Yeah yeah, I know. And even if there was, I'd be fine with it. We agreed to be friends, so...
Joe
You're the best.
I know. Do you want that one?
Joe
Yeah. Aunt Lisa, hey. Mind if I help you with those?
Oh, I see what you're doing. You're trying to get on my good side. It's not happening, no. I don't trust rock stars.
Joe
To carry your groceries?
Joe
I know I got it. No problem.
We're gonna be late. Nick, where are you? - Nick!
No. Macy! There he is. Nick, have you seen Macy?
Joe
Yeah, I want her to film me landing my first movie role.
Where's the camera? I'll do it.
Joe
No, I want Macy.
Yeah, you're not so good with the pictures. You like to cut off the head.
That is an artistic choice.
Maybe she went shopping or quit or went to get her hair done. Who knows what girls do these days, right?
Whoa, back up. Macy went shopping without me?
Joe
Wait, what was that middle one again?
She quit, okay? She quit.
I don't know. We were talking about the Japanese stock market And she just went nuts.
Nick, you must have done something to hurt her. You have to fix this.
Joe
Guys, we gotta get to my audition. Nick, whatever you gotta do to change her mind, do it.
Joe
Okay, buddy, you can do this. You're one of a kind. (Joe enters the room and sees a roomful of him then he leaves the room and calls Kevin) (phone rings)
It's Joe. Hey, dude. Tell me you nailed it.
Joe
There's a roomful of mes in there and I'm freaking out right now.
It's okay. Just calm down. Breathe. Remember everything I told you.
Joe
Kevin, we're way past happy face/sad face. How am I supposed to get in front of a famous director and do a love scene with real emotions?
Hang in there, man. I've got an idea.
Joe
You mean me, right?
This one looks all wrong.
Oh, Mona, this actually is Joe from JONAS.
Well, okay. Mona Klein, - A huge fan.
Joe
Wow.
All right, let's rock this. And action!
Don't you get it, Dade? I'm a ghost. Ghosts can't love. They covet. They desire. But they can't love.
Joe
I could choose to believe that... But if we never try... They we'll never know what could have been.
Cut. Is he in love or is he ordering a cheeseburger?
Just give him another chance. He's a little nervous. That was really terrible.
Joe
I know. I'm sorry.
Joe, look at me. You get to be in love with me. It shouldn't be hard.
Joe
Can I please try again?
You're lucky lunch hasn't arrived yet. All right, one more shot, rock star. What's that Taylor Lautner guy up to? And action!
Don't you get it, Dade? I'm a ghost. Ghosts can't love. They covet. They desire. But they can't love.
Joe
I could choose to believe that... But if we never try, then we'll never know what could have been.
Joe
I got the part!
Are you kidding me? - Dude, congratulations.
Joe
Dude, you might just turn out to be a good director.
Well, I do know how to motivate my actors.
Joe
Stella.
Joe
When I saw you in the window, I just felt so...
Hey, sometimes you just need to see a friendly face.
Congratulations, dade! You were wonderful. I could totally feel our energies colliding.
I'm Stella Malone. I love you on "Malibu High." I never miss an episode.
That means so much. Anyway, we're gonna be working together a lot. It's going to be so intense. (Joe mouths)
Joe
So where do we begin?
Jonas · 237 quotes
