Dino Stefanson quotes from Jackie Chan Adventures

Dino Stefanson

Network's gonna love this.

Wesley Rank

And thus, "Just the Artifacts" has the exclusive scoop on this infamous Snake Talisman, whatever that is. You do think everyone was fighting over the chalk drawing, don't you?

Dino Stefanson

[packing away his camera] Oh, maybe we should ask an archeologist.

Wesley Rank

I AM AN ARCHEOLOGIST!

Dino Stefanson

Oh right, destroying 4,000 year-old drawings, yeah that's what archeologists do.

Wesley Rank

Everything all right?

Dino Stefanson

Maybe a sprain.

Wesley Rank

I meant the camera! Now point it at that exit, let's wrap this up!

Wesley Rank

And with this phenomenal find, firmly in hand, this is Wesley Rank bidding you farewell, 'til next time on "Just the Artifacts"! [turns to leave through the tunnel behind him, before running back screaming in absolute terror] AAH!

Dino Stefanson

Let me guess, edit that out?

Wesley Rank

Welcome, I'm Wesley Rank and you're watching "Just the Artifacts" at the legendary once lost Temple of Culebra Gigante! I have just braved a treacherous climb to the temple's harrowing heights to bring you this...the Snake Talisman!

Jade

[on television, enters the shot, punching Wesley from below] No!

Jackie

Huh?

Jade

I'm on TV!

Jackie

Rank didn't edit that out?

Jade

[on television] Liar, liar, liar!

Wesley Rank

[pushing Jade offscreen; mockingly] Ow, that hurt! [immediately cuts to him running in fear from Culebra Gigante] AAH!

Dino Stefanson

[laughs] Welcome to a special edition of "Just the Artifacts"! Wesley Rank may not know how to treat little girls, but he sure knows how to scream like one! I'm Dino Stefanson, and I'll be your new guide!

Jade

[laughing] Go camera guy!

Jackie

Look!

Dino Stefanson

You'll also get the full scoop on how we recovered this rare Snake Talisman from a local pawn shop Rank sold it to. We of course donated the artifact to the New York Museum.

Jackie

[sigh] After what we've been through, getting the Talisman from the museum should be a snap. [pops neck]

Jade

We're off to the jungle!

Jackie

Jade?

Jade

New York? The concrete jungle? Duh!