The Captain quotes from How I Met Your Mother

Ted

Where's Zoey?

Well, I'm afraid she's feeling under the weather. Guess it's just you, me, and six hours in frigid international waters.

Ted

Or we could stay in dry land, hang out with some witnesses?

Zoey

Oh man, this movie is scary.

I know, right?

I don't know who he is, but I pictured him with a mustache.

Ted

Limit the search to guys with mustaches. Smart.

Anyway, soon the inevitable happened. She told me she was in love with someone else. Obviously, it made me angry.

Ted

And the, that was the last time you saw her...

...but I gathered my composure and told her I'd do anything to keep her. I begged her not to leave. We made love that night -

Ted

[spits out drink] It's damned good brandy.

Lily

Where is it?

Riker's Island. The artist is serving two consecutive life sentences for aggravated homicide. I'm willing to go as high as six cartons of cigarettes and a jug of toilet wine.