I quit.
[pause] You can't quit.
I think you're confusing me with Jake Gyllenhaal.
S6 E3Epic Fail
You saw House, how was he?
He was... good. He was honest, took responsibility. It was kind of weird.
What was my one condition for allowing you to tag along?
Try not to be a jerk. I'm trying. I'm just failing.
Roll your meatballs and keep an open mind. [After a few seconds] How hard are you trying not to make a ball joke right now?
They're smoking. Your balls.
Oh! Ow. No, no. They're browning way too fast.
Blue is the color you got to watch out for.
Enough!
Taste this.
God. This might be the best thing I've ever eaten... and yes, I'm including what you're thinking of now.
I brought you a donut. [pause] The florist was closed.
I'll get a vase and put it in water.
S6 E4The Tyrant
[Foreman, Cameron and Chase enter the office]
Oh my God it's three years ago! — Does that mean I'm still crazy?
[Thirteen got a job offer]
Douglas owes me a favor.
Most people send chocolates.
I'd stand outside your apartment all night holding up a boombox, except you told me you hate eighties music.
[to House] It's easy to be nice to people you like. But being nice to people you hate, that's a skill. Do it.
Only psychopaths can kill other people without having some sort of breakdown.
I went down to the morgue to rerun the antibodies test.
We ran it twice.
Turns out I couldn't get in. They had an armed guard. But I saw this. [He holds out a sheet of paper.] It's a sign-in sheet from the morgue. Your signature. [Chase slowly takes the paper from Foreman.] 9:45 this morning. That's right before you guys ran the test. What were you doing there?
Follow-up on a clinic case.
What case?
You think this is really important...
One of the patients in the morgue was a 70-year-old woman who had scleroderma. You and Cameron, if you took that woman's blood, you could have messed up the test results so we treated Dibala for the wrong disease.
Cameron had nothing to do with it.
[loudly] You son of a bitch.
He was going to kill the Sitibi. Every last one of them.
[shouting] I don't care what he was going to do. He came to us and put his life in our hands.
[quietly] All the good we've done... Every life we've saved... It would have meant nothing... If we just sent him off to kill hundreds of thousands of people. Look at the news. The moderates are taking over. There's hope for peace talks. You tell the world that I faked this test, Dibala becomes a martyr. The massacres begin.
I cover this up, I become your accomplice. You think you can guilt me into that?
If the cops are going to come for me, please warn me... So that I can tell my wife first.
[Foreman takes the sign-in sheet and Chase sits back down.]
Chase... You really think you can kill another human being without any consequences to yourself?
[his mouth moves for a moment without sound; shakes his head] No.
S6 E5Instant Karma
[about House] When is he getting his license back so we can stop playing this game?
[looks at the file] Maybe never. This game is fun.
[Thirteen arrives at House's apartment; House answers the door]
Stay out of my life.
Okay. [goes to shut the door, but Thirteen stops him.]
I know you cancelled my reservation. You obviously saw me log in when you were spying on me in the coffee shop.
I was talking to you. I was spying on the MILF in the running shorts.
Thirteen called.
She have a theory that makes more sense than abdominal epilepsy?
She said someone hacked into her email account and cancelled an airline reservation. I'm guessing Foreman.
Really? You're accusing Foreman, not me? Cool.
[After Chase realizes House knows about the real cause behind Dibala's death, and House switched the records to cover it up]
How'd you find it?
Fat old black guy, knew he had to be taking something for his cholesterol.
And what now?
I'm not the boss.
You don't think I should be fired?
Why? Doubt we'll ever be treating a genocidal dictator again. Better a murder than a misdiagnosis.
[Standing up and looking House in the eyes] Whether you want to be in charge or not, you are, and you always will be.
S6 E6Brave Heart
I need to know what your plans are.
First we take Berlin and then we circle around behind Poland and yell "surprise!".
These quotes come from Wikiquote's House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.