Those pork dumplings sent us on a fake pizza delivery!
The address was to "Dogdoo 8", but the universe ends right after Dogdoo 7.
[to Dwight] Child mon, is this true?
Yeah, but why are you mad at us? Your dummy brigade wasted a week on an obviously fake mission.
[points at Bender] Plus, they're making bootleg beer inside company property!
[nervously] Lies! Lies and slander! [belches foam]
FFarnsworth
Accusing gentle Bender of a misdeed?! That's the last straw! You boys have been underfoot long enough!
You jerked the words right outta my mouth! We're their fathers, and it's high times we acted like it!
[eagerly] Ooh-hoo! Here comes violence!
[clears his throat] Get a job, you lazy kids!
[Dwight and Cubert gasp]
[groans, then gets out a baseball bat] I guess if you want children beaten, you have to do it yourself.
What kind of a father would I be if I said no?
We're making beer. I'm the brewery.
I heard alcohol makes you stupid.
Actually, Dwight, you're right. Alcohol is very, very bad ... for children. But once you turn 21 it becomes very, very good.
What's this device's marketability? Who's the target consumer?
There is no target consumer! Only targets. Targets that will tremble in fear as their new master hands down edicts in my glorious, booming voice!
FFarnsworth
This is my latest invention; a device that lets anyone sound exactly like me!
[Speaks into machine] Good news, everyone! I'm a horse's butt!
FFarnsworth
I am? That's not good news at all, you little--!
If you were my kids, you'd get quite a talking to ... from your father ... when he got home from the Senate.
You don't wanna miss the unveiling of our new company, do you?
Company? [He laughs.] How cute! What will you be pedalling? Lemonade? Shoe shines? Cootie insurance?
FFarnsworth
Perhaps they've constructed a teddy bear hospital!
[They laugh]
Actually, we're starting a competing delivery company.
[He pulls the sheet off to reveal a red "Awesome Express" logo. Hermes and Farnsworth look at each other and stand up]
Welcome to the world of business.
[He and Farnsworth kick the logo and smash it down]
Gets movings. These papers ain't gonna deliver themselveses. Only the Sunday edition can dos that.
How dare they call us kids? We're old enough to find the Fox network infantile.
People, as you know, our young sons have become great successes in the very same field as us.
Naturally, we're humiliated.
That's why we need you, our loyal crew, to make Planet Express eight-hundred-percent more profitable.
We'll start by slashing salaries. And this time, I mean REALLY slashing.
Uh, guys, I don't know how to tell you this... so I'll just let Fry blurt it out thoughtlessly.
[cheerfully] We don't work for you anymore!
[Hermes gasps]
[Dwight and Cubert have taken over Planet Express]
YOU ROTTEN KIDS! Uh, will you be hiring?
Ah, beer. So many choices, and it makes so little difference.
How 'bout Löwbrau? It has dots.
Overruled! The choice of champions is Pabst Blue Robot.
I can't drink that. The metal shavings make my throat bloody.
Wah, wah! Baby wants a Zima!
Hey, hey! We can all fight when we're drunk.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
