Niles does not want to get involved in undoing Frasier’s criminal activity
Fine, I’ll do it myself! Here, hold this for me. (hands Niles the stolen item)
What for?
[grabs it back] Now your prints are on it too, you have to help me!
Fiend!
S11 E17Coots and Ladders
Frasier claims that Niles is afraid of spiders…then also that he is afraid of heights…then also of crowds
You are looking at that rarest of beasts: the arachno-acro-agoraphobe!
S11 E18Match Game
[Daphne’s doula insists on a drug-free childbirth, and Roz, as a mother, can hardly believe her ears.]
HHarvest
A natural childbirth needn’t be painful.
It needn’t be, but it be!
[Daphne changes her mind about the natural birth after seeing a video of one.]
I’m having my baby the way God intended: in a hospital, numb from the waist down!
S11 E19Miss Right Now
Niles has discovered fast food. Frasier remains unconvinced
I guess he's got the fast food bug.
And which one would that be? E. coli?
S11 E20And Frasier Makes Three
Frasier explains his strategy for winning Charlotte over
I am merely going present myself as the anti-Frank.
Ah, so you’re going to be not rugged and not handsome. Interesting.
No…
You could also be not passionate and not committed.
Very funny.
Maybe she’d like you if you were not interesting and not informed…
Niles!
[Charlotte has just told Frasier that she no longer remembers what she and Frank were fighting about.]
[to Niles] You know what that means, don’t you? They had a long night of acrobatic make-up sex.
I’ve just thought of another way you could be the anti-Frank.
S11 E21Detour
I've always been a sucker for that romantic movie-ending goodbye. A fog-shrouded train platform, a passionate kiss.
With a romantic dip.
Yes, well, maybe I am, but there are damn few of us left.
(leans back) Dip. Dip.
I had a great time with you today. With somebody else, it would’ve been a disaster.
With somebody else, I would’ve been in Portland.
S11 E22Crock Tales
Roz is dropping by with someone she wanted me to meet.
Ooh, a lady friend?
[sarcastic] No, we’re going to form a jazz trio, Niles.
[Niles is drowning his sorrows after separating from Maris]
Alice is so cute! She fell asleep hugging her bottle.
I’m right behind her!
S11 E23Goodnight, Seattle
Charlotte is cooking dinner with Frasier
We’re such a cliché: the little woman at the stove, the big rugged man with his brawny arm…
[interrupts] Oh, the hollandaise is breaking!
I've had enough easy goodbyes, I'm kind of glad to have the chance to have another tough one.
[After spending time with Daphne’s brothers, Niles is worried about his child]
The idea that our son might take after them is making me crazy!
Now Niles, just remember, those hearty Crane genes are in there, too.
Oh, please. Those Moon genes have probably beaten our genes up and stolen their lunch money!
[Last lines on his KACL talk show] For eleven years you've heard me say, "I’m listening." Well, you were listening, too. And for that I am eternally grateful. Goodnight, Seattle.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Frasier pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.