TV show quotes
[Carol is alone in recovery now, caroling without any other ER docs- horribly.]
On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me....uhhh....
[All the other ER docs enter surprisingly and start singing.]
12 tone-deaf doctors.
11 lords a lording.
10 drummers drumming.
9 something, something.
8 maids a milking.
7 swans a swatting.
6 geese a gagging.
5 golden rings! 4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree!
Guess who's in the suture room? Come on, guess.
We don't wanna guess.
He's wearing a Catholic girl's outfit. Plaid skirt, ballet slippers, frilly blouse. David Morganstern ring a bell?
Our David Morganstern?
Knee socks, too.
Somebody get a camera!
Do you have anything to eat?
I think there's some haggis left over.
What's that?
Don't ask...
[Ruby is mad at Carter for lying to him about his wife]
What do you want from me?
The truth!
Fine, your wife is dying and she isn't leaving this hospital!
Thank you!
[Ruby storms out]
Ruby... I'm sorry.
Call me "Mr. Roubadoux!"
What are you doing here on your day off?
I went for a jog and ended up here, and I figured I might as well save some lives.
One other good reason not to exercise.
Denial is a funny thing; it keeps you from asking the tough questions.
What questions are those?
Am I dangerous? Should I be practicing medicine?
And the answers are: no and yes, in that order.
I hope so. I lost my family for this job.
Boy, are you arrogant! There's you and the Pope. You guys are infallible. And then there's the rest of us.
Well, as of today, the Pope's on his own.
Hey, what happened to those worms in radiology?
They're doing a consult.
No, no, those earthworms. I put a bucket of earthworms in there and they're gone.
[at the funeral] Mr. Rubadoux, I'm very sorry about your wife. I made a mistake. Not in the way I treated her, but in the way I treated you. I wasn't honest, wasn't fair. I was wrong and I am very, very sorry.
This day isn't about you, Mr. Carter.
[to Carter] You know, when you first got here, we were a little concerned about you. You seemed to care too much. We're not worried about that anymore. What happened to you, Carter?
I'm heading upstairs.
Can we watch?
My God. Connie, haven't you had that baby yet?
Oh, you won't have me to make fun of after today.
Thought you were working up to your due date.
I have, and then some. Doc's gonna induce if nothing happens by Monday. I'm going up to OB for a non-stress test. I feel like a damn elephant.
An elephant's gestation period is two years.
Oh, shut your mouth.
Chuny, you were on yesterday. Tell Dr. Ross Scottie Pippen was in here.
Oh, yeah and so were Jordan and Rodman. Jerry and Conni and I beat them three-on-three.
I didn't think it would be so hard.
That's why they call it labor.
[to his dad] I was standing there, Ray. It was 7:30, and you were supposed to be there. I was standing there. Where were you? You were exactly where you have always been your entire life: someplace else!
Randi, you meet a cute guy for the first time. What do you do?
Run a credit check.
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