Manny, you can't force people to change. But you're not doing it to me, so who cares, right? All right, let's get going.
Yeah, me and the Atomic Sombreros are doing a lunch concert, remember?
ETEl Tigre/Manny
This band thing is going nowhere, Frida. You need to give it up and learn something practical, like how to tap dance!
[gasps in shock] Give up my band?! Wait, now you are doing it to me!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
[shaking irately] I said… LEARN TO TAP DANCE! [smiles and leaves]
SSergio
Somebody should really do something about that guy, huh?
Yeah. Somebody should. [later in a closet, she assembles all the students for a meeting] People, I want Help-zilla out, and the old Manny back. And Sergio here has an idea how we can do it.
SSergio
[stepping in] I believe I know someone who can help. Someone who can… show El Tigre the error of his ways.
SSergio
[laughs] Yes. A counselor. [starts laughing maniacally] Uh, I, uh, I just remembered a joke.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
[examining his statue] Man, I look good.
BBoy
You look like a BULLY!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
[turns around, seeing Frida and all the other students angrily facing him] Frida? What is this?
[sternly] Manny, there's someone I want you to talk to. Where's Sergio's friend?
SSSeñor Siniestro/Sergio
[drops down in front] Here!
Ooh, this may have been a mistake.
SSSeñor Siniestro/Sergio
It's over, pardner! No more bullying these fine-a folks!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Bullying them? I was helping them. Right, guys? [the other students tear down his statue] I thought I was doing good.
[as Manny makes it school, just in the nick of time; happily] Manny, we are so proud of you!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
[weakly] Hooray.
I was finally going to be rid of him!
SSergio
I was finally going to be rid of him!
[his mustache piece falls off; enraged at Sergio with a background of fire] YOU'RE LATE! 500 DETENTIONS!
[Sergio screams in shock]
Everything worked out great, Manny. There's just one problem.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
My shattered spine?
We gotta keep getting here on time every day for the rest of the year.
[Manny faints and passes out]
SSSeñor Siniestro/Sergio
What do we got here, pardners?
It's El Tigre and Puma Loco, man. Do you have any eyes or something?
Oso! Dr. Chipotle Sr. suggests you get rid of this hideous creature!
Creature? He my twin brother, El Ossito! We exactly alike, man!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Let's get to what we came for.
PLPuma Loco/Grandpapi
Yes! It's time… To sign up for the Supervillain Grand Prix!
Puma Loco, this illegal street race is for villains only!
PLPuma Loco/Grandpapi
Aren't you saying I am NO VILLAIN, VOLTURA?!
Not you, the boy! He more like a hero than a villain, lately.
ETEl Tigre/Manny
Me? Ha! Would a hero do this? [gives Dr. Chipotle Sr a wet willy]
SSSeñor Siniestro/Sergio
A wet willy?!
[The other villains all gasp]
Dr. Chipotle Sr. still feels that El Tigre should be DISQUALIFIED!
ETEl Tigre/Manny
But I gotta be in the race! Me and Grandpapi always do it together.
El Tigre wins! Uh, go figure. And to ensure that no one leaves, all losers will be shackled!
Nobody shackles Mal Verde!
[glares at him and blasts him with her mystic guitar and he gets shackled with the other losers] Anyone else got a comment?
SSSeñor Siniestro/Sergio
What's a comment?
Good. You will all be freed once we have a winner. Now, prepare for your events!
[Sergio and Diego shockingly realize they both have a crush on Frida and angrily get into each other's faces]
SSergio
You after my girl!
SSergio
You might as well give up now! Frida will melt at my charm, and the cool accent. I'm suavé.
No, my brains will melt her. From math to science, my knowledge is encyclopedic.
BBoth
FRIDA WILL BE MINE! Jinx!
Stop! If you guys want Manny, you gotta deal with me first!
[Sergio and Diego both gasp in shock]
SSergio
They are so close. [cries in heartbroken] Frida can never be mine.
[also heartbroken] Or mine. And if we can't have her…
SSergio
[moaning] Oh, Frida, my be-goggled lady love.
Frida, blue-haired light of my life.
BBoth
One day, you will be MINE!
El Tigre: The Adventures of Manny Rivera · 255 quotes
