Eddy quotes from Ed, Edd n Eddy

Eddy

This ain't right!

Edd

[takes his shorts off] Right on.

Eddy

WHO ARE YOU?! [speeds to get a boomerang from Edd] Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

Edd

[loses the boomerang] WHAT THE SAM HILL IS GOING ON HERE?! I'M NAKED!!!

Eddy

Do something, will ya?

Edd

I know just to do, Eddy. I little dab of soap will do the trick.

Ed

And I'll go fetch the Kankers since they’re are whizzes at stuck fingers.

Eddy

NO, WAIT! ED!

Eddy

We're sinking!

Edd

Lifeboats! We forgot to make lifeboats!

Edd

Gadzooks!! Do you see any jawbreakers? I certainly don't?

Eddy

They're all gone! Say it ain't so Double D!

Edd

I'm afraid we're too late, Eddy?

Ed

Come out, come out, wherever you are

Eddy

This is your fault! Admit it! If you do, I promise not to leave bruises.

Kevin

Hey, you lovebirds, vamoose. Babysitting's over, 'cause I just scored big time. Later.

Ed

You forgot to say 'dorks,' Kevin.

Eddy

Did you see Kevin's pockets? They're bursting with cash, I tell ya.

Edd

Let's hope for Kevin's sake those stitches don't tear. Wouldn't it be a shame if he were to lose that plentiful peck of pennies?

Eddy

Yep.

Edd

Yep? Is that all you have to say for yourself? Yep? No rash, nonsensical quip to defraud Kevin of his fortune?

Eddy

Scam Kevin. That's what he said, right? I'm way ahead of you, Sockhead. Here's the plan, boys.

Eddy

Hey monobrow, give me a push will you?

Ed

Can do, Eddy! But I cannot join you in your merriment for I am responsible for Plank's mommy and daddy. Hey, hold it one darn second there.

Eddy

This is all your fault. They're all just hunks of wood, for Pete's sake.

Edd

I wouldn't say that too loudly, Eddy. I think they're watching us.

Ed

Make them go away, Double D! Make them go away!

Eddy

Man, this is stupid.

Old Eddy

What happened to us, Double D? We look like turkeys.

Old Edd

Calm down, Eddy. I'll let you shuffle.

Old Eddy

I hate cribbage. I'm just a kid.

Old Edd

[chuckles] Kid? Oh, Eddy. We haven't been kids in over 90 years.

Old Eddy

90 years?!

Old Ed

Baby go wee-wee. [he and Edd laugh]

Eddy

What's this about you givin' stuff away? How am I supposed to compete with that?

Edd

My school supplies! Gone! Pillaged! Plundered! It can't be! IT CAN'T BE!

Edd

A highlighter pen?" "How am I supposed to take notes with a highlighter...

Ed

"Double D, can I have your hat?"

Edd

Oh sure, why not! Why would I need a hat when school is now totally out of the question! Wait! You still have it, don't you? From your parents, yes? The back-to-school-sale coupon?

Ed

Haven't got a clue what you're talking about, Double D. All I got is a back-to-school-sale coupon from my parents.

Eddy

That stupid thing's worthless! The signs are as clear as the gap in your teeth, sock-head. School ain't meant to be. 'Cause it's Summer baby!

Eddy

Oh puh-leeze.

Ed

Sounds good to me, whatever you just said!

Edd

Quickly, Ed! We have shopping to do!

Eddy

Oh c'mon, guys! Forget school, will ya? SUMMER AIN'T OVER!

Eddy

Oh yes you do, or Ed here will write your locker combination on the girls' bathroom wall.

Edd

You wouldn't dare!

Edd

What are you doing to that poor defenseless dictionary?

Eddy

Ed's cramming for the spelling bee. [Eddy stuffs pages into Ed's ears] Feeling smarter, Ed?

Ed

[spewing out loose sheets as he speaks] What?

Ed

This Bubble Bathbel is a smart guy.

Eddy

It's Bobby Blabby, idiot.

Kevin

Better spill the beans, Mr. Editor, or you're paper pulp.

Edd

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Kevin

Who wrote this stuff?

Edd

Miniature aliens? Hairy legs? Lost cities and spandex bicycle shorts? Who indeed is this Bobby Blabby? Eddy? Care to explain?

Eddy

What? Uh... couldn't tell ya. Sounds like a jerk.

Ed

You dropped your loot, Bibby Boo-boo.

Eddy

IT'S BOBBY BLABBY! GET IT RIGHT! Oops.

Eddy

Hey! Let me go! Untie me!

Ed

I found him the science cupboard pretending to be a stuffed beaver, Double-D.

Edd

The nurse thanks you, Eddy.

Eddy

Oh Yeah? What for?

Edd

For helping Kevin conquer his fear of needles by allowing him to witness the safe and easy administration of a real booster shot.

Eddy

Oh no you don't! Not me!

Ed

Worry not, little man. Because you get to have a lollypop after.

Eddy

Mommy.

Kevin

Sweet.

Eddy

But... No! Don't do it! I'm too young!

Ed

Needle!?

Eddy

I hate Needles!

Eddy

Great. So I end up with a detention because of your stupid eating habits.

Ed

Is it that time already? Ooh, gravy cakes. Yum."

Edd

Excuse me, Ed, but don't you feel this daily diet of gravy may become detrimental to your health?

Eddy

I swear he's obsessed with the stuff. It's stashed here, right there. I bet you couldn't go a lousy day without your lousy gravy, Ed.

Ed

Says you.

Eddy

SO PROVE IT!

Ed

[screams] Your voice is like toothpicks in my drumsticks, Eddy!

Edd

I agree, Ed. I've always wished Eddy could communicate in a tone of voice that didn't rattle the timbers of every house in a four-block vicinity.

Ed

Don't touch that dial, kids.

Eddy

What about you, Mr. Encyclopediac? I bet I could stop yelling way before you could stop using those big fancy-schmancy words of yours.

Jonny

Plank says Double D would go wacky if he only used words with one syllable.

Eddy

Ha! Even the doorstop's got you pegged.

Kevin

Aw, Dork, Dorkk and Dorky are having a little tiff. Ain't it precious? [He and Nazz laugh] What dorks.

Rolf

Always with this duck word, yes Kevin-boy? Rolf would wager his love of mammal flesh and 25 cents that you cannot renounce this label for the mixed-nuts Ed-boys.

Eddy

25 cents?

Kevin

What? I can give up saying dork just like that. [Snaps his fingers]

Eddy

[To Jonny] Think you could go a whole day without that chunk of termite food telling you what to do?

Jonny

Easy-peasy lemon-squeezy, Eddy. Right, Plank?

Eddy

Sounds like we got ourselves a bet.