Piccolo quotes from Dragon Ball Z

So you think you're pretty tough, huh? Well, it won't take me long to have you face first in the dirt begging for mercy.

Piccolo

Give it a try!

[after transforming] So, tell me...how do I look? I may not win any beauty contest but I'll beat your tail.

Piccolo

You? Disgusting.

Piccolo

[about Frieza] In my wildest dreams, I've never seen anything so powerful...I wonder what it will look like.

Krillin

I'll bet it's the most hideous, ugly, repulsive creature in the universe.

Vegeta

[after Frieza kills Dende with his death beam] What happened?

No! No!

Nail

Dende! No, it can't be! It just can't be!

Piccolo

Frieza, you monster!

That's one down, and I didn't even break a sweat.

No, Dende!

What does this mean?

Krillin

It means Piccolo was right and that Vegeta doesn't stand a chance against Frieza!

Piccolo

No one stands a chance against Frieza!

[after whipping Goku into lava with his tail] A pity really. Such an uneventful ending and for such a great fighter.

Piccolo

Hey, what have you done to him? Where is he?

Where is...who?

Piccolo

You know who I'm talkin' about!

Oh yes. I seem to recall him melting in the river of lava. How would you like to join him? I'm making a stu down there and I wouldn't mind adding a Namek for seasoning. Yes, that's just what it needs. Perfect. Consider it done.

Captain Ginyu

[while in Bulma's body, about Frieza beating Goku] Hee hee ha ha ha. This is great!

Krillin

She's lost it.

Captain Ginyu

It looks like Frieza's going to win after all. Hee hee hee hee ha ha. I should've known.

Piccolo

Look. Shut up or leave and that's final!

Captain Ginyu

Oh...

Krillin

Are you sure you're okay Bulma?

Captain Ginyu

Yes...I guess I got carried away for a second there. Sorry guys. [Bulma in the frog's body begins to toss little rocks at Captain Ginyu in anger]

Hey!

Captain Ginyu

What's the matter guys...why are you looking at me so funny? You wouldn't hurt a lady, would you? Hm? Hee hee ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Krillin

Hey, look out! It's Ginyu!

Krillin

Ahh! We forgot about Bulma! What are we going to do?

Don't scare me like that, Krillin! For a second, I thought you saw Frieza again.

Krillin

In...in some ways, Bulma's worse than Frieza. Uh...at least that's how I feel.

Aha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Piccolo

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Krillin

Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh.

Ooo...ooo...don't make me laugh Krillin. I still ache all over.

Vegeta

You're all so foolish to assume Kakarot would abandon such a good fight, because the blood of a Saiyan flows too strongly in his veins. And now, as that idiot martyr is becoming a Super Saiyan, his hunger for battle is even greater! Nothing will stop Frieza and Kakarot from fighting, that is, until Namek explodes and they both go out with a bang! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Don't laugh!

Vegeta

Meanwhile, since I was revived from death, I should become even stronger, and once Kakarot and Frieza are both completely out of the picture, I'll be the most powerful fighter in the universe!

Piccolo

You little...

Vegeta

I must admit this was unexpected, but that doesn't mean I won't enjoy it! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Yamcha

[speaking telepathically to Bulma] Bulma! Can you hear me?

Huh? Who said that? I must be losing my mind!

Yamcha

Bulma, you're not losing your mind. It's me, Yamcha.

Huh? Yamcha? Where? I don't see you.

Piccolo

Huh?

Huh?

I can hear you though. Did somebody shrink you or something?

Yamcha

No, nobody shrunk me. I'm full size. Look, Bulma. I'm communicating with you telepathically. King Kai arranged it. I'm relaying a message for him.

No way...

Bulma? Yamcha's talking to you? It's King Kai, he must have a message.

Hey, that's what he said. Man, that's wild. Telepathy, huh? So, it's true then. It is Yamcha. Hiya Yamcha! What's up?

Yamcha

Not a lotta! Just hangin' out with the other dead guys. You know how it is. But hey, I have to hurry, because uh...I'm sorta calling long distance. It's about Goku, Bulma. The fight on Namek is over.

You're kidding. Who won?

Yamcha

Goku did. He beat Frieza. But uh...

Goku won! Alright! That's our Goku! Hey guys! Goku won!

Wow! Dad really won! Yay! Woo! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!

Piccolo

[to himself] Goku, you did it my friend.

[dancing around with Dende] Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!

Dende

Aha ha! Aha ha ha!

Vegeta

[to himself] He did it. Unbelievable.

Yamcha

Bulma, please listen. That's not the end of the story. There's more. After Goku defeated Frieza, he tried to use Frieza's space ship to high-tail it outta there, but the darned thing bugged out on 'im. He was stuck, with no way out! When Namek exploded, Goku went with it! He's gone.

Hold on guys! There's more! Goku didn't make it off planet Namek before it exploded. He's dead.

Yamcha

Huh!?

What a bummer.

Yamcha

Bulma!? What are you doing? Are you nuts? You're not givin' a weather report or announcing the score of a football game. The kid's dad just died. I could've done a better job than that.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Duh. Now listen up, peabrain. I'm the one with the real inside scoop, not you. What would you say if I told you that with the dragonballs from Namek, you can wish people back to life more than just one time? That means we can wish everybody back. Goku, Krillin, and Chiaotzu can all be wished back. You're all coming home. How do you like them apples? And it's not gonna take that long either. So just chill. You dork, I was always the brains of the outfit when we were together and you were always the brawn.

Yamcha

Oh man. Same old Bulma.

Vegeta

[after pounding Gohan into the ground] Pity. What a waste of talent. Bye. [Vegeta tries to blast Gohan to death and Piccolo appears behind him] Huh?

Piccolo

Not today. Back off.

Vegeta

Ha. Have it your way.

Please, father. Come home. I know you're still out there somewhere. You have to be. I need you dad.

Vegeta

A tough guy like you should be able to face the truth.

Vinegar

Good, yeah. This'll be fun!

Piccolo

Fun? You slither around in the darkness waiting to capitalize on people's weaknesses, and you call that fun?

Garlic Junior can destroy you anytime Piccolo. He has Kami held captive you fool!

Piccolo

What? Garlic Junior's back?

Admit it. You've always had a fascination with the dark side Piccolo. Why don't you join Garlic Junior now while you still can? He's about to take over the planet.

Piccolo

Yeah right. Don't make me laugh. Come on, how could someone stupid enough to get caught in his own trap take over a planet friend?

Ey! Watch your mouth!

You're gonna wish you never said that lizard boy.

Vinegar

You're lucky that lord Garlic ordered us ta take you in alive or I'd finish you off right now.

Piccolo

How did your brainless boss escape the dead zone?

Vinegar

Alright, that's it. You're dead.

Hey...heh heh heh. Settle down, Vinegar. He's just trying to get you riled up. I'll answer your question Piccolo, if you really want to know. [pointing upward] The power of the Makyo Star.

Piccolo

Go on. How?

Ah yes. Now I have your attention. Not long ago, the autumnal equinox was on the first point of libra. Heralding this auspicious moment for the dark side was the Makyo Star, whose proximity to the Earth provided an incredible source of power to all creatures of the night. This rare alignment of the planets and stars occurs only once every twelve thousand years. At no other time is man more susceptible to evil than this. It is a time when the powers of darkness are at their zenith and the unseen lower forces dominate the Earth. Garlic Junior used this influx of dark energy as a springboard to shatter his prison and escape it forever. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You don't get it do you? Garlic Junior is the new guardian of the Earth. He's taken over Kami's lookout and is seated quite comfortably on the throne. Kami and Popo are just mantle pieces now, looking on hopelessly from their little glass jars.

Piccolo

Huh?

Uh?

Krillin

Great. We're in trouble.

The beautiful part about it all is that with the black water mist, we hardly have to raise a finger. Just look how eager your friends are to help us. We're gods to these plebians.

Vinegar

We're like celebrities to all these people, kinda like the role models an' all!

Yeah! Dig it man! You should join us! You would love it. They worship us. And soon they're gonna be like that for good.

Huh?

Krillin

What!? For good?

Once twenty four hours passes by, the change becomes permanent. Not even the sacred water can change them back.

Heh heh heh heh. You came here looking to fight us, but the battle has already been won. There's no one left to fight for, nobody wants your help. Can't you understand that? Just look. Look at your friends. Do they look like they're waiting for a knight in shining armor to come and rescue them? Who do you think you're fooling anyway? You haven't really changed. So drop the goody two-shoes act and join us. Or oppose us and suffer like you've never suffered before. Your choice. Well?

Krillin

I guess it's true what they say...you can't trust anyone anymore. Heh heh heh.

Grr...grr...grr...grr...

Krillin, you and Piccolo are really good actors. I didn't suspect a thing. You two were acting, weren't you?

Krillin

Heh heh heh heh heh...

Piccolo

Hmph, with Kami and Popo as hostages, that was the only way I could get close enough to Garlic Jr. to release them safely.

Kami

Thank you for freeing us Piccolo. We are eternally grateful.

Piccolo

Spare me your thanks. I didn't rescue the two of you because I wanted to Kami.

Kami

Hmm...

Piccolo

The only reason I did it was because with you captured, I can't fight at my maximum power.

Kami

Yes, of course.