Salt quotes from Dragon Ball Z

You see, boys...our army of darkness has always been here. We just have to wake it up.

You're a genius lord Garlic. What a brilliant plan.

Yeah. You've really outdone yourself this time boss.

Why, thank you. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Krillin

Gohan, wait!

No! I'm not scared! These freaks did something to my mom!

We sure did. So?

So you'd better change her back right now!

Hee hee hee. We can't, you dope. Only the sacred water kept at Kami's lookout can do that.

Sacred water?

Vinegar

That's right. But Kami's on an extended leave of absence.

Too bad ey? But don't worry. Our boss is guardian now. Garlic Junior.

Grr...

Oh, I see you remember 'im. Lord Garlic will be pleased.

Vinegar

Yes. Indeed he will.

Give up kid. You're outnumbered.

Vinegar

Good, yeah. This'll be fun!

Piccolo

Fun? You slither around in the darkness waiting to capitalize on people's weaknesses, and you call that fun?

Garlic Junior can destroy you anytime Piccolo. He has Kami held captive you fool!

Piccolo

What? Garlic Junior's back?

Admit it. You've always had a fascination with the dark side Piccolo. Why don't you join Garlic Junior now while you still can? He's about to take over the planet.

Piccolo

Yeah right. Don't make me laugh. Come on, how could someone stupid enough to get caught in his own trap take over a planet friend?

Ey! Watch your mouth!

You're gonna wish you never said that lizard boy.

Vinegar

You're lucky that lord Garlic ordered us ta take you in alive or I'd finish you off right now.

Piccolo

How did your brainless boss escape the dead zone?

Vinegar

Alright, that's it. You're dead.

Hey...heh heh heh. Settle down, Vinegar. He's just trying to get you riled up. I'll answer your question Piccolo, if you really want to know. [pointing upward] The power of the Makyo Star.

Piccolo

Go on. How?

Ah yes. Now I have your attention. Not long ago, the autumnal equinox was on the first point of libra. Heralding this auspicious moment for the dark side was the Makyo Star, whose proximity to the Earth provided an incredible source of power to all creatures of the night. This rare alignment of the planets and stars occurs only once every twelve thousand years. At no other time is man more susceptible to evil than this. It is a time when the powers of darkness are at their zenith and the unseen lower forces dominate the Earth. Garlic Junior used this influx of dark energy as a springboard to shatter his prison and escape it forever. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You don't get it do you? Garlic Junior is the new guardian of the Earth. He's taken over Kami's lookout and is seated quite comfortably on the throne. Kami and Popo are just mantle pieces now, looking on hopelessly from their little glass jars.

Piccolo

Huh?

Uh?

Krillin

Great. We're in trouble.

The beautiful part about it all is that with the black water mist, we hardly have to raise a finger. Just look how eager your friends are to help us. We're gods to these plebians.

Vinegar

We're like celebrities to all these people, kinda like the role models an' all!

Yeah! Dig it man! You should join us! You would love it. They worship us. And soon they're gonna be like that for good.

Huh?

Krillin

What!? For good?

Once twenty four hours passes by, the change becomes permanent. Not even the sacred water can change them back.

Heh heh heh heh. You came here looking to fight us, but the battle has already been won. There's no one left to fight for, nobody wants your help. Can't you understand that? Just look. Look at your friends. Do they look like they're waiting for a knight in shining armor to come and rescue them? Who do you think you're fooling anyway? You haven't really changed. So drop the goody two-shoes act and join us. Or oppose us and suffer like you've never suffered before. Your choice. Well?

Alright, you heard him. Why don't we get started. Prepare ta get whooped!

Vinegar

Hey, don't whoop him too bad. Save some for me.

But two against one wouldn't be fair, would it?

Ah, like they say...all's fair in love and war. Hee hee hee hee hee. Come on kid, lets play. I haven't got all day.

Aha ha ha ha. Oh, isn't this wonderful Kami? I've always believed that revenge is so sweet.

What are you waiting for? Well, if you're not gonna make a move, then I guess I will. [Salt pummels Gohan]

Krillin

Gohan, I'm comin'!

Hey, hold on! Where ya goin'? It's my turn ta play with you! [Mustard repeatedly slams his knees into Krillin's face]

[while pummeling Gohan] Aha! What's wrong kid!? You don't wanna fight with me? Oh please! I thought the son o' Goku was a little tougher than this! My sister can take a punch better than you!

[about Gohan] That kid's sure got a lot of moxy.

You're not kidding. He's on fire.

Well, I think you should have first crack at 'im. Okay?

Remember what he did last time? I say two against one is our only option against him.