The annual block party was a winter tradition on Wisteria Lane. It was a way for the residents to spread holiday cheer. Everyone was invited, including Art Shepard, the newest resident of Wisteria Lane. But as the big night drew near, more than holiday cheer was being spread around. By Sunday evening, most of the gossiping had subsided, and the neighborhood was once again consumed by the spirit of the season. Friends laughed over eggnog, lovers kissed under mistletoe, and the mood was jolly. That is, until a certain guest made his appearance. Yes, for the residents of Wisteria Lane, it was the most wonderful time of the year. But for Arthur Shepard and his sister, it had turned out to be a very silent night.
“The Miracle Song” · Season 3
In this episode: Susan Delfino (10), Bree Van de Kamp (8), Gabrielle Solis (4), Gloria (4), Ian (4), Lynette Scavo (3), Mary Alice Young (2), Mike Delfino (2)
While you're in a good mood, I thought I'd spring something on you. My parents are coming to town.
Your parents? Really?
And I wondered if you might be free to join us for dinner Saturday.
Absolutely. So I assume this means they know about me?
But of course.
And they know about me as in (in a bad English accent) "Mum, Dad, bloody good news. I've got myself a smashing new girlfriend."
That's adorable. Please don't do it in front of them.
Ian, haven't you ever wondered why I've never cooked for you?
I just assumed that you were lazy.
I wish. My cooking is not good.
Well, my parents won't be expecting a gourmet meal.
Will they be expecting stomach cramps, acid reflux, night sweats?
Now nothing elaborate. Just a simple roast and, uh, and something appropriate to go with it.
Right...like an ambulance.
VVern
Poor thing, she tries so hard.
Yeah, she's a trooper. Let's dump her.
VVern
How will I tell her family?
We'll do it together. We'll be very diplomatic.
VVern
Are you sure about this? The poor kid's been through the wringer and—
Amy! For God sakes, Little Miss Snowflake does not scratch down there!
VVern
Well, then again, her mother died a year ago. How long is she gonna milk it?
What are you watching?
Home movies.
It's fun looking back at the past, isn't it?
Well, it's one way to kill time while you're waiting for death.
We also have cable.
It's not that easy. I love him.
You'll get over it. I did.
So I'm cooking dinner for Ian's parents tomorrow night, and it's the first time I'm meeting them, so I sort of wanna impress them.
And yet you're cooking?
What's going on?
They just arrested Mike for murder.
What?!
"They're saying he killed that woman on the news, that Monique person."
Oh, thank God!
VVern
Well, when it comes to performing, she's not exactly...well, she tends to be...feel free to jump in.
I have no idea where you're going with this.
VVern
Well, as Gaby and I discussed, Amy has certain limitations and her odds of winning are slim.
Vern! He is so competitive. I constantly have to remind him they're just kids. When did you lose the joy?
VVern
Oh, I think you know.
I don't know if you picked up on this, Mike, but...I haven't been happy.
No, I didn't pick up on it.
Well, I wanted to tell you this weeks ago, and I wish that I had, because now I know you're gonna think that I'm breaking up with you over this whole blood on the ax thing.
Wrench.
Whatever. But believe me, that's not it. It's just...we are moving too fast.
What are you trying to say?
Well, maybe we should just take a break. You know, date other people.
You're telling me this on the day I'm put in a men's prison?
Well, I said the timing was bad. I am sorry. I, I really am. I just can't do this.
Is Edie getting you a good lawyer?
I doubt it. She dumped me today.
What? Why?
Well, I was arrested for murder.
Still. It's tacky.
Well, you, uh, you may not be a good cook but you're certainly a tidy one.
Don't worry. Dinner's all taken care of. We're having blanquette de veau and a grand marnier soufflé.
Well, that's very ambitious of you, and, uh, when will Bree be done making it?
Five-thirty. But I am rewarming it all by myself.
What are you saying? You think Mike is guilty?
Hey, why don't we start that girl talk?"
I'll get the ball rolling. Anybody have a yeast infection?
They found Monique's blood on the wrench that Mike was trying to dispose of. I mean, that hardly screams innocence.
Her teeth were pulled. You don't think that's worth telling the cops she was messing around with a dentist?
If you're so sure that Orson is innocent, why don't we go through his things? Where's his desk?
At his office. And what did you think you'd find there anyway?
I don't know. A blackmail letter, a necklace made of teeth?
Well, I am certainly not playing with a woman that is willing to let Mike take the fall for her psycho husband.
Well, needless to say, I won't be cooking dinner for Ian's parents.
Fine. I'll cook myself.
Good. Let me know if there are any survivors.
And if you take Orson back, you do the same.
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