Scenes with Dark Danny 166
[Danny sits on the steps of Casper High; Jazz comes over to him]
DannySo how long have you known?
About the test? For days, but I'm really proud of you for not cheating.
Danny
Not that. [Danny holds up Jazz's tattered note and torn piece of her headband] Your headband, your note with your handwriting.
What that? [chuckles nervously and blushes] I didn't write that. And there must be dozens of headbands.
Danny
[looking unconvinced] Jazz...
[sits down beside Danny] Since the Spectra thing. I didn't want to tell you until you wanted to tell me. It's your secret.
Danny
Well, it's our secret now.
[They hug]
Don't think this means I'll stop being meddling and overprotective.
Danny
I wouldn't have it any other way.
Danny
[to the ghosts] "I'm trapped in this story. The guy's off his nut."
"He ought to know better."
"Let's go kick his butt!"
Danny
"Roses are red; violets are blue.
Once these fry, I'm guessing this lame poem is...! [Destroys the keyboard] Through.
NO!!!"
Danny
"I'm still talking in rhyme!"
I would have forewarned you, if given the time!
There are two ways to finish this poem. Just two.
I'd type out "The End", but I can't, thanks to you!
So, now, you'll guide this story of the ghost who hates Christmas!
Think you can do it? All mopey and listless?
[Gets thrown in the prison truck] You think this ends here? You’re about to get burned!
This story's not done 'TIL THE LESSON IS LEARNED!
Danny
And that's when I thought, maybe this is the moral –
In the same way my folks love their old Christmas quarrel:
Everyone celebrates in the way of their choosing.
I was so busy whining, I started abusing
The ones I loved most and I ruined their cheer.
I'll try to be better come Christmas next year.
Uh, nice sentiment, but what are you, a greeting card?
Yeah. Why you talking in rhyme?
Danny
We're not talking in rhyme. [excited] We're not talking in rhyme!
[As Ghost Writer is shown in a prison cell, a bear-like creature scoots up to him. Ghost Writer tries to scurry away until he sees Walker in front of the bars, holding an orange]
[exclaims in fear] Get that thing away from me!
[the gang sees Skulker fly by]
Skulker?! He's hunting you again?!
Again?! As in more than once?
Danny
Jazz, take it easy. There's a rhythm to these things. Ghosts attack, we exchange witty banter, I kick ghost butt, and we all go home having learned a valuable lesson about honesty, or some such nonsense.
[jotting down on a memo pad] Attack, banter, kick butt, lesson, got it. [beat] So, why is he not attacking?
Danny
What?! [Sees Skulker flying away] No attack? He's ignoring me?!
Danny
[watches Skulker tear through the lab equipment in the basement] And here I thought you weren't hunting me.
Where is the Ecto-Converter?
Danny
See, that's more like it. You make demands, I ignore them.
[Jazz walks in the janitor closet holding her laptop with Danny's personal ghost files on it]
Danny
Where did you get this?!
Danny
You hacked into my personal ghost files?! And how did you get the password?!
STSam, Tucker, and Jazz
It's Paulina Fenton.
Seriously Danny, it's not that hard to figure it out.
How come you never told me Vlad Masters has ghost powers? And he has a thing for Mom?!
Danny
Because it's none of your business! [while he closes the laptop Jazz is holding]
[sneaking out of the closet with Tucker] If you don't mind, we'll be over there, doing the "glad I'm an only child" dance.
Danny
Calm down? How can I calm down with you constantly butting your nose in where it doesn't belong?
I was just trying to help...
Danny
NO ONE ASKED YOU TO HELP, Because you're a lousy ghost hunter, [while people are listening outside the closet] an overbearing sister, and an annoying, obnoxious know-it-all who has no respect for her brother's privacy", SO STOP HELPING! [they gasp and Jazz begins running crying out of the closet and the people then glare at Danny]
Do you want us to talk to Jazz?
Danny
I'm perfectly capable of talking to my own sister!
...Which is why you're hiding from her. In a broom closet.
Danny
No, I'm not!
Danny
Hide me! [jumps into a trash can]
Danny
We're gonna have to fight. But we're gonna need to make it look convincing. [Jazz punches Danny, sending him into the shield. He is shocked by the electricity and falls back to the ground]
That's for humiliating me in front of the whole school.
Danny
Alright, I deserve that and I'm sorry, you're just trying to help, but please just follow my lead. [She punches Danny who gets electrocuted again then punches him repeatedly as he falls, but he phases her suit into the ground]
Danny
Will you listen to me for once in your life?!
[about his PDA] It's picking up Technus! Something in his new upgrade is making my PDA all wonky.
Like at the mall... And the lab... And the ferris wheel! He's pushing Danny and Valerie together! [Tucker laughs] [unimpressed] If you're done, we have to tell Danny.
[giggling and speaking] You wanna tell Danny that Technus is playing matchmaker? How do you think he's gonna react to that?
[Scene changes to the next day with Danny laughing]
[annoyed] Are you done yet?
Danny
No. [keeps laughing] Okay, now I'm done. You're trying to tell me that Technus is trying to hook me up? Come on! Technus hates emotions!
And hello? He's using yours against you.
Dim lights, stalled ferris wheel - You think the universe wants you two to be together?
[Valerie is shown hiding in the bushes]
Danny
Well, maybe, but... I don't know... I might.
[Sam and Valerie gasp]
Uh...really? Because Tech...
[sees Valerie hiding] Uh... Technically because we just want you to be happy! If you like her we'll just have to make space for her at our table. [eye twitches]
Danny
Speaking of Valerie I was suppose to meet her before class. [Danny walks away and Valerie shows up]
Um...uh...yeah, sure. If Danny likes you and you like Danny, the least we can do is give you a chance. [Valerie hugs Sam] Human contact...crushing Goth...indifference....
Danny! Word on the street has it that you've got a girlfriend! [to Sam and Tucker] Can you two leave so I can have a totally awkward "father and son"-chat?
STSam and Tucker
[run off] Gone and gone!
[Scene cuts to Jack and Danny eating Ice cream in the kitchen.]
Danny
Does it have to be awkward?
Yep! I'm gonna give you some fatherly advice. Then I am going to say something that makes you cringe and run out of the room in embarrassment!
Danny
Check. Advice, first?
Alright... If you really like this girl, Danny, you should let her know and give her something... Like this! [puts a ring on the table]
Danny
[surprised] A class ring?
A girlfriend's not a girlfriend until you give her a class ring, Danny. It also says, "I think you could be the girl I fight ghosts with"! [beat] At least it did with your mom - I don't know how appropriate that is for you...
Danny
[laughs] You'd be surprised. I can give her this?
Only if she's special. I'm sure Sam'll love it!
Danny
[alarmed] It's not for Sam!
[laughs, unconvinced] Of course, it's not! You guys are just friends! [leans in slightly] I even had it engraved! [Danny looks at the ring, and sure enough, Sam's name is engraved on the inside] See, that was the embarrassing thing. Now, if you'll excuse me, it's time for pie! [holds up a pie, Danny walks off] Clueless...
[sees Valerie following Danny into the sky] Uh...Danny. Danny. Come in, stay alert. You have company.
Danny
Company? What kind of company?
Danny
She's not my girlfriend until I give her the ring.
[gives Danny the ring] Here you go.
Danny
Well, she said she'd give up ghost hunting. For me. Besides, I like her, and she likes me – isn't it supposed to be that simple?
STSam and Tucker
[shrugs] Clueless.
[puts her hand on Danny's shoulder] Danny?
Danny
Wow. I-I'm glad you're here. I, uh wanted to ask you something.
Actually, me first. [Sam and Tucker walk off] Danny, I've had a lot of fun these last few days, but my life's way too complicated right now for us to be anything other than... friends.
Danny
Just... friends? B-b-but I thought...
I thought, too. But there's something important I have to do, and I don't want you to get hurt because of it. Besides, it's not like you were going to give me some lame class ring, right? [kisses him on the cheek]
Danny
Ye-eah, right.
[Valerie leaves as Danny opens his hand holding the ring and looks at it. Valerie goes behind the corner of the school building, changes into her new suit, then looks back at Danny seeing how sad he looks. She gets a determined look on her and flies off. Danny sits down as Sam returns]
Danny
[gives the ring to Sam] Can you hang on to this?
[tosses up the ring like a coin] Ah, clueless.
Danny
[after Dash asks where they should hide on Jack's indoor mini-golf course] Have you seen him play golf? The only safe place is the hole!
[Danny and Dash hurry into the hole, as golf balls whiz past them.]
Man! Is everyone in this family bad at sports?
We did it! What do you think we just benched? Proportionally?
Danny
I don't know, dude. I'm not that good at math.
And soon, you will not be that good at breathing either.
Danny Phantom · 303 quotes
