Paige Matthews quotes from Charmed

Piper

Wow pre-natal yoga this morning and now you wanna crash a stranger's funeral. You really do need friends.

Paige

You're mean.

Piper

Hi! I am off to yoga and then to the salon for a manicure and pedicure. There's a cherry pie cooling on the counter and I will be on my cell.

Paige

Uh uh. Prenatal police lady. Put the mug down, step away from the coffee.

Piper

It's herbal tea. I'm on a natural high today.

Piper

Ah, Jinxed! I should have know this was going to happen. It's the story of my life, when everything is going great something will inevitably happen that will ruin it.

Paige

A little spider did all that to you?

Piper

Oh, you just wait, you will see.

Cole

Please, you've got to help me.

Piper

See?

Leo

As your whitelighter, I would say go with your instincts.

Paige

Okay.

Leo

But as your brother-in-law, going up against your sisters is pure suicide.

Paige

Great. You really helped clarify this issue.

Paige

What does this Barbas do? What's his thing?

Piper

He brings really bad things to life.

Phoebe

Paige, orb the potion.

Paige

It's in a puddle.

Piper

You can do it, Prue did.

Ay, there's the rub. You're no Prue, are you?

Piper

Oh no, they're going upstairs! Should I stop them?

Paige

No, only if you want to make a total ass of yourself - but that's up to you.

Piper

Too many spells and potions to remember, let alone defend against.

Phoebe

We're dead.

Piper

Again.

Paige

And again.

Phoebe

How long have you guys been standing there?

Paige

Long enough to know you've got some serious 80's dance moves!

Leo

You're getting your first charge.

Paige

Are you serious?

Leo

Yeah, well the Elders aren't exactly known for their sense of humor.

Paige

That is so great. I am now Paige Matthews, whitelighter-witch... I'm a hyphenate.

Phoebe

Last night two guys held up a bar and a vigilante killed them.

Paige

That sounds more like you need an arrest warrant, not a potion

Phoebe

Not when the vigilate is tall, dark and handsome and can send people flying with the wave of a hand.

Piper

Well, that doens't mean it's Cole.

Phoebe

Did I forget to mention the scorch marks?

Piper

That means it's Cole!

A little advice, you need to work up a cover. Didn't you read the whitelighter manual?

Paige

There's a manual?

Paige

The Elders sent me to protect someone without telling me who he was.

Piper

I'd say that's a bit of an understatement.

Piper

Everything is so bright and cheery and ruffly.

Paige

Your pants stopped fitting you.

Piper

Well, I could have gone up a size or two. I don't have to resort to maternity clothes. I just feel so-

Adorable! I think it's you.

Piper

Obviously, you don't know me very well. Look, do you have anything that will go with combat boots? Ya know, something for the mom-to-be who kicks some ass upon occasion? You know something in black. Or gray.

... I'll go check.

Piper

So what? I'm unbreakable, dude.

Paige

Dude, I'm not.