Camp Lazlo · Season 1
Chef Mcmuesli, I'm assigning Chip and Skip here to work for the mess hall.
Oh alrighty then boys let's get to work you'll put these hair nets. So what I'd like for you guys to do is... [notices that their hair nets are mainly wrong]
I saw a firetruck.
What do you recommend? [Chip fills all the tray from rice] It needs something. [thinks what needs, meanwhile a fly dies by the insects killer and falls into the tray. he soon speaks to Chip] You’re a genius [although the dead fly do this]
Ugh... [walks backwards disgustedly]
I'm not hungry anymore.
We might throw up.
[The Jelly beans run away from the mess hall]
[annoyed] OH, I'LL TAKE THAT! [chews the tray and throws up off-screen]
[Lumpus gets in crying] Are you hurt, Scoutmaster?
[sadly] Paper cut!
Where? [the phone rings] Huh, there goes the phone. You boys can bandage him up, right? [Lumpus sounds like a hurted puppy dog] You'll be fine. [speaking to the phone] Look how many times do I have to tell you mechanics what to do with my car? I'm going to take you through it step by step for the last time so listen up.
Hey Nurse Leslie, we bandaged him. What else should we do?
Step one: open the hood.
Open the hood. [Chip and Skip hurting Scoutmaster Lumpus]
Then lift the engine.
Lift the engine. [staying hurting Scoutmaster Lumpus]
Now remove and reattach the hose. [Lumpus screams and runs away in panic, because Chip and Skip did too bad] Get out.
FLIP AND DIP!
Yeah?
MOVE THAT MOUNTAIN!
Yes, Sir.
[pointing Lumpus] Really, all this for a cabin upgrade.
[Lumpus laughs evilly, meanwhile Chip and Skip move and knock down to the mountains like a line of dominoes' tokens]
[screams and tries to leave but the last mountain squashes Lumpus] Ow!
[wearing Lumpus's scoutmaster hat] I've always wanted to wear this!
I don't look like that.
[Last lines]
[to Lazlo] Scoutmaster Lazlo?
Yes, Raj?
Um, my cabin's on fire.
Oh, I'm not the scoutmaster anymore, Scoutmaster Lumpus is now. He's not leaving.
Ohhh... [moves over to Lumpus] "Scoutmaster Lumpus, my cabin's on fire. [the camera zooms out to show camp on fire] Scoutmaster Lumpus, there's fire on your shoe.
[Edward and Gretchen are getting into a heated argument while they and the other bean and squirrel scouts get ice cream from the ice cream truck]
Mine is the best!
No, mine is the best!
Oh, yeah?!
Yeah!
Listen, platypus. Frostbite Pops are the best and you know it!
If you brought your head out of the swamp, you would know that Sputnik Cosmopops are 33 and a third times better your garbage on a stick!
Drill Pops!
Cosmo Pops!
Isn't great how Gretchen and Edward debate every time we get a visit from the ice cream truck?
Really...great.
Dumb argument.
[firmly] She starts at every time!
[enraged with her face all red] Lazlo! [grabs him by the shirt with both hands and pulls him into her face; vengefully] I'm gonna get you, if it's the last thing I do.
You're gonna get me? What does that mean?
Oh, I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise.
[Lazlo seeing Edward taking out the bazooka and aims at Gretchen]
Gretchen, look out! [bursts into the restaurant] GRETCHEN!!! [Edward opens fire] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! [gets hit, and reveals that he's wearing the "I'm a Jerk" t-shirt]
[Last lines]
I'm just glad that no one got hurt.
[walks, slams into a pole, and falls onto the ground] I'm hurt!
Oh, boy! The latest issue of "The Weakly Bean." "How to deal with tetherball anxiety." Wow! This is really gonna help my game.
Lazlo, you read "The Weakly Bean?"
Every issue.
Do you do the trivia challenge?
Oh, I just love the trivia challenge!
Then how come you never send in your answers?
Well, I figured I'd let someone else have a shot at winning.
Well, you don't have to worry about that because no one else reads it! [hugs Ping-Pong, weeping and sobbing]
Yes?
Hello, there. I need some newspaper for the bottom of my birdcage. The latest issue of The Bean!, perhaps.
Your bird isn't even alive!
HELP! HELP! My inflatable "Puffy the Pouffy Pony" is loose and floating out with the current! Help! Save Puffy!
[to Lumpus (disguised as Scooter)] Scooter, I think the perfect last test for you would be to swim out and retrieve Puffy the Pouffy Pony for um… uh…
[points to his name tag] Ted.
…For Ted here.
[in disguise] That's all I have to do? Get Puffy the Pimple-Popper, or whatever he is, and then I can peruse the paper?
[Last lines]
I'm going to brush my teeth. [walks towards his cabin]
[to the campers] Do you think we should tell him who's toothbrush he used to clean the latrine?
[Dave and Ping-Pong hold up newspaper gear and smile]
[to the Jelly Beans] It was you! You were the one that messed up Camp Kidney with your sunflowers! You've changed all the shower heads! The flagpole! And I don't want to say what you did with Slinkman!
[Cut to Slinkman wearing sunflower petals around his eyes]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Camp Lazlo pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
