DHD'Hoffryn
Oh. Hymen's greetings.
Hi–what?
DHD'Hoffryn
Hymen. The god of matrimony. His salutations upon you. May the love we celebrate today avoid an almost inevitable decline.
Cool.
S6Hell's Bells
It's nice to watch you be happy, for them, even, I don't see it a lot, you, uh... you glow.
That's because the dress is radioactive.
AAnya
I, Anya, promise to cherish you. Yeah, no, not cherish. Um, I promise to have sex with you whenever I want, and uh, uh, pledge to be your friend, your wife, and your confidante, and your sex poodle-
Uh, "sex poodle"?
[As Xander wanders the streets in the rain, Anya recites a final version]
AAnya
I, Anya, want to marry you, Xander, because... I love you, and I'll always love you. And, before I knew you, I was like a completely different person. N-not even a person, really. And I'd seen what love could do to people, and it was... hurt, and sadness. A-alone was better. And then, suddenly, there was you! And-and you knew me. You saw me. And it was this... thing. You make me feel safe and warm, so, I... get it now. I finally get love, Xander! I really do.
S6Normal Again
Then I was like... No, it wasn't like, I was in an institution. There were, um, doctors, and nurses and other patients, they told me that I was sick... I guess crazy. And that, um, Sunnydale and all of this, none of it was real.
Oh, come on, that's ridiculous! What, you think this isn't real just because of all the vampires, and demons, and ex-vengeance demons, and the sister that used to be a big ball of universe-destroying energy?
[Buffy is an inpatient in a psychiatric ward in an "alternate reality" LA. Hank and Joyce Summers, still married, are sitting with Buffy as they consult with her psychiatrist.]
[sobbing] Dawn...
Dawn?
PPsychiatrist
The sister. She was introduced last year. It didn't make a lot of sense though, did it Buffy? She altered the fabric of her reality drastically. (meta-commenting on how the abrupt introduction of Dawn altered the entire series)
[Spike and Xander have found the demon that poisoned Buffy.]
Oh, balls! You didn't say he was a Glarghk Guhl Kashmas'nik!
'Cause I can't say Glarba...
DDoctor
In her mind, she's the central figure in a fantastic world beyond imagination. She's surrounded herself with friends, most with their own superpowers. Together they face grand, overblown conflicts against an assortment of monsters, both imaginary and rooted in actual myth.
'Cause what's more real? A sick girl in an institution, or some kind of supergirl, chosen to fight demons and save the world? That's ridiculous. A girl who sleeps with the vampire she hates?!? Yeah, that makes sense.
S6Entropy
AAnya
I wish you had tentacles where your beady eyes should be! I wish your intestines were tied in knots and ripped apart inside your lousy gut!
They are.
AAnya
Really? [brightening] Right now? Does it hurt?
God, yes. It hurts so bad it's killing me. Anya, I love you. I want to make this work.
AAnya
Those are... metaphor intestines! You're not in any real pain!
AAnya
You're lesbians, so the hating of men will come in handy. Let's talk about Xander.
Well, it's-it's really not so much about hating the men.
We're more centered around the girl-on-girl action.
AAnya
And men really like to watch that kind of stuff, don't they? Men like Xander!
...
AAnya
[frustrated that Willow and Tara won't wish ill on Xander] What kind of lesbians are you? If you love men so much, go love men!
I don't think he could feel any worse.
AAnya
Let's test that theory.
Anya, Xander's my friend. I know what he did was wrong, and if it happened to me, I'd-
AAnya
Wish his penis would explode?
Things fall apart, they fall apart so hard.
Tara?
You can't ever... put 'em back the way they were...
Are you okay?
I'm sorry, it's just... [sigh] you know it takes time. You can't just... have coffee and expect--
I know.
There's just so much to work through. Trust has to be built again, on both sides... You have to learn if... if we're even the same people we were, if you can fit in each other's lives. It's a long... important process, and... can we just skip it? Can... can you just be kissing me now?
You tell them if you want. Go ahead. Rock the boat. Rock and roll it the hell over. My friends and I'll still be groovin' with the movin'. [She stakes the first vamp] Know why? I tried to kill my friends, my sister, last week and guess how much they hate me now? Zero. Zero much. So I'm thinking, sleeping with you... They'll deal.
In that case why won't you sleep with me again?
[The second vamp looks at Spike with a confused expression on his face. Buffy stakes him]
[walking away] Because I don't love you
[To himself] Like hell.
S6Seeing Red
Mmm, I forgot how good this could feel. Us. Together. Without the magic.
There was plenty of magic.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Buffy the Vampire Slayer pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.