Eric Matthews quotes from Boy Meets World

Feeny

I was cleaning out the attic and found a trunk that belonged to my great-aunt Fanny.

Eric

Fanny Feeny?

Feeny

Don't go there.

Eric

So I said to myself, "Kyle - "

Alan

Kyle?

Eric

That's what I call myself.

Eric

[about graduating] You know, I don't think I could have done this without everyone in this room believing in me. That's why this diploma, which signifies my intelligence, belongs as much to you as it does to I.

Feeny

[correcting] Me.

Eric

I included you.

Feeny

Oh, dear.

Eric

[eating pie] Oh, oh, that is delicious! What kind is this?

Pie.

Cory

Eric we have to go home and here's why, I'm completly out of clean underwear.

Eric

Eh' Big deal, I ran out a week ago. I'm sittin' pretty.

Cory

Yes but you see, I don't know if you've noticed, but I've also run out of pants.

Cory

I want to go home.

Eric

I want you in pants!

I'm surprised you had the guts to show up.

Eric

[seeing her Goth look] I'm surprised you're out when the sun is up.

You don't want to see me any more, do you?

Eric

Oh, oh, it's more than that. I want to put you on a rocketship and send you to planet Flaflooga.

Eric

Oh, that could be about anyone.

Shawn

Well the next song is called Eric Matthews, You're So Vain You Probably Didn't Know This Song Before It Was About You.

Eric

I'm famous!

Eric

Oh come on there's 2 billon people in the world this could be about anyone.

Shawn

Track 2 Eric Matthews, You're So Vain You Probably Didn't Know The Song Before This Was About You.

Eric

I'm famous!

Cory

You know we've lived in the same room for 15 years and you never even told me about your first time.

Eric

Remember Mitchell Davis?

Cory

That's an unexpected surprise- how 'bout your second time?

Eric

Bear with me. Now, you know that Mitch and I were always competing: Who could- who could run the fastest, who could shoot the most baskets, who could catch the most flies...

Cory

Oh, please, get to it.

Eric

Well, one day Mitch shows up here with a brand new bike; three-speed, emerald green, speedometer on the handle.

Cory

Wait, that's the same one you had.

Eric

Right that's why Mitch got his but you see, to show me up, Mitch's didn't have any training wheels on it. So I beg Dad, "Dad you gotta take these training wheels off". Dad said I wasn't ready. Well apparently Mitch wasn't either because one day we're riding down Oakhurst Drive...

Cory

Ah, Dead Man's Hill.

Eric

Right. Mitch falls off his bike, slams his head into a couple of trash cans, and that my friend is why Mitchell Davis repeated the sixth grade eleven times.

Cory

Eric what could this possibly have to do with me and Topanga and moving past kissing?

Eric

Cory, sex is like a bike without training wheels. Try it before you're ready, you're gonna fall off and break your head.

Cory

So, the Hunters' trailer is right over there.

Eric

The one that looks like all the other ones?

Cory

Yeah, that's it.

Feeny

What are you doing in Beantown?

Eric

Hiding from you; and I fail. Why must you stalk me so?

Eric

Y'know something, Cor? He's absolutely right. I mean, I had this same problem when I broke up with Francesca. There's a lot of pain, there's a lot of heartache. But eventually time stepped in. And I got over my devastating loss.

Alan

Who's Francesca?

Eric

[whispering loudly] There is no Francesca, I'm just trying to help.

Alan

[whispering loudly] Nobody wants that.

Eric

Oh, there's Kelly. Better get going.

Amy

Whoa, wait a minute. You guys have been going out for a while and we still haven't met her. You should invite her to come in.

Eric

Uh, you know, Mom, we're really in a hurry.

Amy

[calling out the door] Kelly, hon, come on in.

Eric

You know something? We're really in a rush.

Alan

What's the matter? Afraid I'll say something to embarrass you?

[enters] Hi, I'm Kelly.

Alan

[looking her over] Atta boy!

Diana is the baby-sitter.

Eric

Ooh, role-playing. Okay, I wanna be the commander-in-chief of the allied armies.