Seeley Booth quotes from Bones

Sweets

What mistake?

Booth

Hint: it's not what you think.

Sweets

You disagree with my conclusion that the two of you are in love, and the sublimating energies of that connection are responsible for the energy, vigor, and rigor that you bring to your homicide investigations.

Booth

I just told you it's not what you think and you immediately say what you think.

Brennan

That's your interpretation. We recognize your right to interpret.

Sweets

You do?

Brennan

That's your right as a psychologist to get everything wrong.

Booth

Okay, excuse me, you know what, you really need to learn how to speak to human beings.

Brennan

I speak six languages .. two of which you've never even heard of.

Booth

You know what, you're a cold fish.

Brennan

You're a superstitious moron!

Booth

Get a soul!

Brennan

Get a brain!

Brennan

I used to come here to find animals to dissect. I didn't have a boyfriend.

Booth

Well, maybe because you were cutting up little woodland creatures.

Brennan

Why are you so suspicious of Mr. Buxley?

Booth

Why? Because, you know, he's psycho. He has access to the shop. And he has a huge knife.

Booth

Bones, you're tearing up.

Brennan

This is the prom I never got to go to.

Sweets

Now, this first victim, Sarah Tidwiller, was a member of the class of '94?

Booth

And the second victim was killed just before the reunion of the same class, so it doesn't sound like a coincidence to me. The cops here agreed to keep everything quiet until we ID the victim and catalogue the evidence.

Sweets

And this, uh, Ray Buxley, was a prime suspect in '94?

Booth

Yeah, he was the High School Custodian, but they didn't have enough to hold him.

Sweets

[reading file] Lives alone, low-status job, obsession with gruesome crime stories, surrounded by teenage girls - Very creepy. It's like, Freddy creepy....

A seasoned law enforcement agent who still has empathy for victim. I'm glad to know you're out there.

Booth

At your service.

I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime?... Maybe this weekend? Unless of course, I'm a suspect, cause I know you can't date me if I'm a suspect, right?

Booth

I ... I can't date anyone who's a suspect.

I understand.

Booth

Yeah, right. It's FBI, rules regulations.

Brennan

He emailed me and said he had tickets to a play.

Booth

He emailed you for a play??

Brennan

I believe that play is Andrew's code for sex. Is it okay for us to talk like this?

Booth

Yeah!

Brennan

Well, when he invited me to the play I thought it was code for sex, so I said no.

Booth

Oh.

Brennan

But I said yes to coffee.

Booth

Maybe that's a code.

Brennan

Angela informed me that coffee isn't a code for anything.

Booth

I have a date, too.

Brennan

[surprised] Good.

Booth

Catherine Bryar.

Brennan

Everyone at the aquarium is a suspect.

Booth

And once she is eliminated as a person of interest --

Brennan

Why did Andrew call?

Brennan

What's wrong with these angelfish?

They've been listless the past few days. Most likely from something they ingested.

Booth

Or someone.

Brennan

We should take these fish back to the lab.

No, you can't! These are a gift from Morocco!

Brennan

They need to be tested for trace evidence in a murder investigation.

Booth

We'll get them back to you. Don't worry.

Brennan

I may or may not get them back to you.

Brennan

I'm going to have coffee with Andrew.

Booth

Alright, have a good time.

Brennan

Thank you!

Booth

I'm going to see someone too.

Brennan

Dr. Catherine Bryar.

Booth

Case is closed.

Brennan

She's very nice. The two of you seem compatible.

Booth

Maybe. We'll see.

Brennan

She's easily as pretty as I am. I mean, using me as a standard.

Booth

Bones, you are the standard.

Brennan

Andrew is not as handsome as you, using you as a standard. He is however, taller. Catherine isn't as smart as I am.

Booth

Well, I'm not as smart as Hacker.

Brennan

You once said he was a doofus.

Booth

He is a doofus, a smart doofus.

Brennan

I hope you have a good time together.

Booth

Yeah, you too.

Brennan

[smiles] Thanks.

Booth

[aside to Sweets] Just tell me if any of these kids is a killer.

Sweets

Well, it's pretty tough to tell your average nine-year-old from your average psychopath.

Booth

Don't say that, all right? I have a kid nearly that age.

Sweets

Children are still forming their sense of ethics at this age. Like I said, they're basically sociopaths.

Booth

Well, I'm not afraid to bring this guy in.

You should be. You value your pension, you should be.

Booth

Ok, well, I'm not, even when you sound like Yoda.

You want me with you when you talk to him?

Booth

Why?

Vladov the Impaler? The nickname is self-explanatory.

Booth

Nah, I can handle it.

Good. But I truly hope that you don't end up getting eaten by sharks because your successes have done wonders for my career.

Booth

No. No. Uh, let's -- you think, we can go twenty minutes on this case without talking about testicles?

Sweets

Please.

Brennan

Okay.

Booth

Great.

Brennan

Booth has made a social contract with a marine biologist.

Sweets

Sorry?

Booth

[laughing] It's amazing that you go from injured testicles to the woman I'm dating. [turning to Sweets] And you, you're supposed to say, "Oh, that's interesting," in a very annoyed way.

Brennan

It's a logical transition.

Sweets

But it is very interesting.

Brennan

Booth and I are friends. Catherine is an intelligent, attractive woman, and I'm intrigued by their developing relationship.

Booth

That's nice. I think.

Sweets

Yeah. I think it is nice.

Booth

Thank you, Bones.

Sweets

Wow. You two seem to be handling dating very well. I'm impressed.

Brennan

Well, you've known me for two years, Sweets. You should expect to be impressed by me.

Brennan

Our partnership is so important to me. You know that, right?

Booth

Sure. Yeah. Die for your partner. That's the way I look at it.