Gustavo quotes from Big Time Rush

James

I love being a part of the RCM/CBT Global Net/Sanyoid Family... but I hate their hair dryers.

Gustavo

CUT! Just say what's on the card!

James

And what? They've completely ignored ionized technology.

Gustavo

You have said NOTHING I can use for the last 2 hours!

James

(Stalling Gustavo and talking extremely slow)) and in no way am I purposely stalling you.

Gustavo

Where did you get that banana?

James

Waffle? No thanks, I already ate!

Gustavo

The bad boy is a rock and roll tradition.

Gustavo

Notice: The back turned to the rest of the band. Bad boy.

Gustavo

Notice: the back turned, the dark clothing, and the scowl. Bad boy.

Kelly

But there can only be one bad boy per group, as learned from the bad boys experiment of '95.

Gustavo

Didn't sell a single CD.

Logan

WayneWayne is a total fraud.

James

He wants to kick Kendall out of the band. (Kendall raises his arms)

Gustavo

Really? I bet on Logan.

Logan

(laughs) Well you would have LOST.

Gustavo

(In the bad boy off, where Kendall has just been wrecking Gustavo's office) (Talking about Kendall in an annoyed way) HE USED MY DESK AS A BATHROOM!!

Kendall

Bad boys go where they want.

Ooh, that's a new one.

Gustavo

[playing on the piano] Any kind of guy you want, that's the guy i'll be...this song, is terrible. IT'S TER-RI-BLE!!!!!

Katie

Don't you have to be in love to write a love song? I mean, you're not wearing a wedding ring, and don't you hate EVERY LIVING THING?

Kelly

You told me to get him to stop sneezing, and I did.

Gustavo

But he can't sing! And we have to sing this love song, because the record company wants a love song, AND I STILL HATE THIS SONG!!!!!

Kelly

Well, he refuses to take an allergy shot, (waves her arms around) AND I'M NOT A NURSE!!!!!

Gustavo

Your yelling has improved. But more like this: GET HIM AN ALLERGY SHOT!!!!!!!

I tell you I want a slow love song, and instead you ignore me, and give me...a hit.

Gustavo

YES! (the others cheer)

But I still want a slow love song. And put the word "baby" in it.

Kendall

Okay, so we do put a little wear and tear on things from time to time.

James

But that's showbiz! Right?

Gustavo

WRONG. And it's time you take responsibility for your actions. By paying me back...my TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!!!!!

James

So how 'bout this one.

(singing) Please don't stay another moment. We don't wanna hear more words spoken. Walk out through the door, OH LOOK, IT'S OPEN! And you snore in the dark and it's freakin' us out. (Gustavo shuts off the game)

James

Bad right?

Kendall

Terrible. (to Gustavo) You know you should probily go back to the mansion and write a new song.

James

A better song for the album. (James picks up some fish sticks and Kendall picks up a suitcase).

Gustavo

Nah, let's go with yours. (James and Kendall lower their things. Gustavo starts the game) I'm skiing down the Alps.

Gustavo

In light of recent skunky events, I have decided...NOT to kill you. (the boys sigh) HOWEVER! You blatantly disregarded my orders to stay away from Jordin Sparks. And proved, once again, you are BAD...LUCK...RUSH!!!

Gustavo...they're not bad luck. They're good luck.

Kelly

Um, they knocked you down a well.

Yeah, but if I hadn't fallen down the well, I would have never figured out the song.

Gustavo

They helped you figure out the song?

Yeah! It's not a solo...it's a duet.

Gustavo

(laughs) Duet? Duet...with Big Time Rush. That is the most-greatest idea I've ever had.

Gustavo

CUT, cut! Will somebody please tell me why James is ORANGE?!?!?!?!

James

Actually, I'm...mangerine.

Kelly

How come all your friends got Hollywood fever, and you didn't?

Gustavo

Because HE has a normal brain, and his friends have the brain of a cricket.

Kendall

We think he might have Hollywood Fever. (Kelly looks worried)

Gustavo

(to Kelly) You, don't panic. (to James) You, STOP BEING ORANGE!!! (he tries to take the cans of mangerine spray out of James' hands as he sprays them, which he eventually does. His jacket has mangerine splattered on it) A-HA!

Gustavo

Well, that didn't work. Let's try this. (he throws the cans on the floor) Fix your FRIEND, or I will FIRE him, and REPLACE him, with someone...who's not...ORANGE!!!!!!!

Gustavo

Boys...as you start to get famous, people will start to ask you for favors. Like a fashion photographer, that wants to direct a ROCK video, even though he has no experience.

Marcos

So Marcos get the job?!

Gustavo

No. (Marcos looks upset) You see what I did there? Even when Marcos starts crying (which he does), I still say...A NO. (Marcos continues crying) Now, go tell your friend that she's NOT IN THE VIDEO!!!

Carlos

(trying to hypnotize Gustavo with his watch) She WILL be in the video...she WILL be in the video...

Gustavo

Get OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!!!!!!(Carlos backs up)

Big Time Rush...all alone. Nobody else! On the tallest building...in the sanseis.

Carlos

I'm afraid of heights.

Logan

I hate tall buildings.

Kendall

Nosebleed!

James

I get nauseous when I stand up! (he stands up, then faints)

Gustavo

NEXT!

They're in a magical underwater city...without girls.

Logan

Can't swim.

Kendall

Me neither.

Carlos

I'm afraid of sharks! (hides)

James

I get nauseous just drinking water! (drinks some out of a cup and faints)

Gustavo

NEXT!