I like beatings, I'll beat ya all day!
S1MC Pee Pants
CCarl
Hey, which one of you guys has been playin' "I Like Candy", for a frickin' week?!?!
It was your other neighbor.
Meatwad.
CCarl
You know what? At this point, it doesn't matter, 'cause it keeps runnin' inside my head and it won't leave unless I blow it out, with a bullet!
[notices Carl's mouth is full] What you eating there, Carl? (walks over to him) You gonna show me some love?
CCarl
Jawbreakers. For some reason, I can't get enough of 'em.
Is that why your teeth are blue?
CCarl
Uh... no.
Oh. Uh... So, why are you...
CCarl
Shut up. [brief silence, then begins singing] I like candy, bubblegum and ta--DAMN IT!!
Trick or treat, smell my meat...[Carl shuts the door]] ...Ah, man.
CCarl
[Opens the door] Look, Meatman, what are you doing trick-or-treatin'?! It's frickin' May.
Look, I need candy. Now, are you going to give me some, or are you going to lose some teeth?
CCarl
I know, I've only heard your little song a thousand times! Now I need candy and I don't know why.
Shhh... I don't listen to that kiddie crap any more, I'm check'n the adult jams now, see, check it. MC Pee Pants don't just want candy now, that's childish, he needs it. And when you need something that's a responsibility, that only only an adult... of my maturity... bunnies!
CCarl
Yeah, I got a deal at the dumpster, I mean, warehouse. Yeah, you might want to wipe the juice off 'em.
You know Meatwad and Carl have been hanging out quite a bit lately.
What, you want 'em to stop? (yelling out the front door) Rape, rape, oh rape!
No, no, no, it's fine, it's fine, but don't think it's a little bit weird that they started washing the car at midnight...and they're still doing it?
Look, people do things, it's a fact.
Shake, did you hear this lyric? About drilling a hole straight to hell, and releasing demons to create a global diet pill pyramid scheme?!
Eh, I don't know. All that rap is is clicks and whistles.
CCarl
612 Wharf Avenue? I know where that is, that's the, uh, abandoned warehouse next to Melon Shakers...th-the Gentlemen's Club.
I should not walk so a child may live. [pause] That's what it does.
Get up!
CCarl
Why aren't your lips moving?
Look, my shniggys, I had a strizzoke in my brizzain, okay? You know what I'm sayin'? So I can't move all good. Thanks for bringing that up, thank you very much!
You're all the things that are in this ad: you're energetic, hard-working, you like people—
No, I love the liquid inside people. How many times I gotta tell you this, man? I'm insane! I eat people-juice. No one's gonna hire a people-juice eater!
[In hell]
Hey guys. Hey man, who's into rap yo?
SSatan
Now you listen to me scab! We listen to speed metal!
Hey man it's cool. [Satan blasts MC P Pants with fire] AAAHH!
SSatan
No, it isn't!
S1Dumber Dolls
Gentleman, behold. My time space contin- [freezes]
What? [long pause] Uhhh....Dr. Weird? [pushes over Dr. Weird, and he explodes] See you later have a good weekend!
[After running over Meatwad's toys with a lawnmower] Hey, your astronauts better watch where they land their ship next time, 'cause they might get overrun by the alien life form, hahaha!
They don't use ships, they use rocket boots.
They don't use nothin' now, do they?
No, no I don't have a firearm, I just got these...action bills.
Frylock, where are the pills?
Pills? What do you need pills for?
Well, Happy-Time Harry needs 'em. He says that the pills make the phone calls go away.
[Writes on a post-it note] Alright Meatwad, this is a prescription from Dr. Frylock for Jolly Sunshine Happiness!
Oh, you think this is a game?! They're gonna garnish his wages and how's he gonna pay child support then, huh? I'll tell ya, he ain't!
Look man, all you had was root beer and triple sec.
I was gonna make margaritas with that!
Ah man, you had tequila the whole time?! Well, where the...where is it?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Aqua Teen Hunger Force pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.