BubblegumIf the King of Ooo tries to come here again, you have my secret permission to stop him. No holds barred, Moosewood Stadium freestyle. So what're you two up to now?
Ehh, guardin' stuff, I guess.
Um... Hey, Bonnie? You always act like a loner, right? But next year your brother, you're the light of the party. Sorry, the light of the party.
Bubblegum
I mean, yeah! One of the first things I did after making sure Neddy was safe was to start making the Candy People. I was formed in the mother-gum. My mind and my gum were in touch with dozens of others, like a crowded womb. I guess I missed that.
But Neddy's from the same place you're from, and he's a wet hotdog around everyone!
Bubblegum
People get built different. We don't need to figure it out, we just need to respect it. Maybe he likes his company more than I like mine.
Well... do you miss the Candy People?
Bubblegum
Maybe we can find something useful around—ohh!! [sees writing on the wall reading "Marceline made me write this – Bonnibel Bubblegum"]
Your tag! We actually found it. Man, your handwriting hasn't changed at all. [laughs] Still as prissy and prim [turns back] as— wha..?
[Bubblegum starts breaking down in her tears]
Hey, h-hey, whoa, wait! I didn't mean... I like your handwriting, I think it's really pretty...
Bubblegum
It's-it's not that... I lost my hat...
W...we can get you another hat.
Bubblegum
I lost my hat, lost my home, lost my people... I can't even keep darn varmints out of my pumpkin patch.
Bubblegum
I tried. I really, really tried. I just— I thought that if I shut everything out and just focused on work, it will all be okay. [debris starts crumbling down] And look what that landed me. All I managed to do was to push everyone away. I pushed you away. I'm sorry, Marceline. I've been a real dinger to you.
C'mon. Why are you even apologising for?
Bubblegum
You really like chopping wood, huh?
I'm not chopping wood. I made a toothpick from the ancient elm! See?
Bubblegum
Oh-hoh! He-heh— [the tree crashes through the window] Whoa!! [a scathed Marceline peeks out the tree]
Bubblegum
What the dip, Marceline?!
Sorry, it was supposed to be a joke. Actually... I have something really serious to ask. I want you to do the procedure. The one we talked about?
Bubblegum
I'm sorry, but I don't think you'd make a good blonde.
No, not that. I don't wanna be a vampire anymore.
Bubblegum
[gasps] Oh, my globness!
You said you were working on a cure, right?
Bubblegum
[sighs] Well, the machine is built and the serums are ready, but... are you sure you wanna do this?
I'm sure. Some bad things happened to me when I was little. When I became a vampire, I was just a messed-up kid. Now it's a thousand years later and I'm still messed up! [Peppermint Butler nods] I don't want to spend eternity like this... with this emptiness. I want to grow up.
Bubblegum
Okay... let's do this.
Bonnie, I don't get it. Jake's talking about vamps at the same time you fixed me, and there can't be any still around!
Bubblegum
Well, clearly something's creeping around.
Okay, what about the paste you took out of me? That should be all that's left that's vampiric in the modern world.
Bubblegum
It's all over there, safely in the safety bucket. [all gone] What?! Pep But, what'd you do with the gunk?!
Okay, there was one that looked like if a baby snake was a baby-baby.
[Pep But scribbles in his sketchbook and shows an illustration of a larva-like thing with its tongue out on top]
Nah, that's not right. There was another one that looked like if an ant hill were a girl.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of ant hill with eyelashes and lips]
Nah, that's not right. There's one of them that looked like a wet uncle.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of a face with a tie, messy hair and moustache with teardrops]
Nah, that's not right. There was a lady who looked like black drapes on a cake pop.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of a cake pop and drapes]
Nah, that's not right. There was also one that looked like an angry stop sign coming out of a loaf of bread.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of what looks like a epicanthic folded face between two sides]
Nah, that's not—oh, actually, that one's pretty close.
[Finn and Jake burp constantly to a severely poisoned Marceline]
Bubblegum
Cut it out! That's not helping her!
But Mom and Dad always burped on us.
Bubblegum
Sorry, guys, there are no cure-alls. Your parents were just burping on you for kicks.
Oh, yeah, that makes sense. [burps] Oh, sorry, last one.
Bubblegum
Auh! What did you eat, Jake?!
Hey, now! I pride myself in having nice-smelling burps. Just kidding.
Bubblegum
Pride, hmm. Do you guys know what "hubris" is?
It's like an old-timey deity who weighed your deeds on a scale.
Bubblegum
No, it means excessive pride or arrogance.
Bubblegum
No, it's true. I believed in myself so much that I was blind to the possible consequences.
Don't believe in yourself so much then, dum-dum!
Bubblegum
[crying] Now my best friend is dying of poison because of me.
That ain't true, PB! Marcy took a risk, and you helped her because you're her friend. Real friends take each other to the edge of death. 'Cause death is life! Right, Finn?
Shoot, yeah! I get poisoned all the time just doing the dishes.
I get poisoned on purpose—for research. I have a poison lab back at the castle.
Bubblegum
Well, let's get our butts over there, then! Find the Moon, Finn. We'll work on an antidote. You guys take her back to the poison lab. Maybe we can extract her healing powers.
Word. [everyone runs off except LSP]
Hey, wait! What should I do? You guys? [pushes a stake out of her] Brrrrr... Hahahahaha!
How many times do you want to do this, Marceline? Our lives are magnetised. [Marceline morphs further and charges at him] We're in a negative loop. But we can change our outcome this time!
I like the outcome where you get staked!
And you become a vampire?
Rrrrh... [morphs back to normal with her head being held]
Marceline... [she starts punching his arm] I know I was ruthless in the past, but tell me. What's the one thing you've noticed about the world since you beat me all those hundreds of years ago?
Everything repeats over and over again. No-one learns anything, because no-one lives long enough to see the pattern, I guess.
But you've lived long enough.
And you still think this is the right way, fighting me?
The other way's like a black hole. An unknown.
So let's consult a witch.
[she immediately punches his face, sending him flying into a large thick cloud. She gets a spare stake from her left boot]
[as she flies over, the thick clouds part away to see a vocalising Vampire King in a cloud pool and shreds his suit]
I'm not afraid of the unknown! [pounding his chest] I have the power to change destiny! [shoots a twirling column of water high in the sky, thunder crashes] Queen of vampires! You weigh the scales of fate! Spill my guts or face the unknown! Either way, I will not bite! For turning you would subjugate me to the wheel of fortune, and I am a king, not a hamster. My path runs straight into the void on a sick flaming chariot! [bursts column and rains on Finn, Jake and Bubblegum]
FJFinn/Jake/Bubblegum
Whoa...
Stake me! I will not hide! [shreds his pants, thunder crashes] Do it, chicken! You make me sick! [drops down and squirms in his cloud pool]
Okay, dag! We'll take your stupid thing out!
Your dang vamp juice! Come on!
[Bubblegum and Tree Trunks walk along in the evening grass after being abducted by aliens]
Bubblegum
I'm really sorry, Tree Trunks. I never meant to hurt anybody with my space program. It was supposed to seed new Candy Kingdoms on uninhabited planets, in case Ooo goes straight-up dong-bongles. 'Cause... like, confidentially, there's a lot of ways that could happen. And when it does, maybe I won't look so crazy after all, you know? [Tree Trunks looks up at the alien spheres in the sky]
I can help you find a space for your goo. [Bubblegum turns to Tree Trunks]
Bubblegum
You would do that?
You and I will never be friends, but we can respect each other as mothers and as fellow believers in the infinite promise of the cosmos above.
Bubblegum
..Sure.
Bubblegum
Marcy?
Bubblegum
My armor has an emergency-
(hugs her) You scared me.
Bubblegum
What?
Even back when we weren't talking, I was so afraid that something bad would happen to you and I wouldn't be there to protect you and- (sheds a few tears) I don't want to lose you again.
Bubblegum
(gently) Hey, I'm a tough gum. Nothing never happening to me, never.
I know, I- girl, you phrased that so weird.
Bubblegum
I might have a concussion. (the two giggle and then kiss)
Adventure Time · 447 quotes
